Sexual jealousy
Sexual jealousy is a special form of jealousy in sexual relationships, present in animals that reproduce through internal fertilization, and is based on suspected or imminent sexual infidelity. It is founded on the instinct of keeping genes in the gene pool and expecting sexual partners to care for the offspring. The concept is studied in human and non-human primates in the field of evolutionary psychology.
Sexual jealousy is cross-culturally universal [1] but, is felt differently between men and women.[2] For men it is felt as a threat to his relationship's future because he could be cuckolded into raising children that are not his own. For women they can lose their relationship and all the benefits that entails to another. Research has shown that men are impacted more by sexual infidelity, while women are more impacted by emotional infidelity, or their partners “falling for” another.[3] There are differences in sexual jealousy regarding a social-cultural perspective. Typically men will place a lot of importance on their masculinity and sexual dominance. When the male's partner commits infidelity, these two components of his ego become severely threatened which is why men are more upset when a partner has sex with someone else. In contrast, women invest a lot of emotion into a relationship and will experience a threat to their self-perception when a partner commits infidelity, hence why women are more concerned with emotional infidelity rather than the sexual kind.[4]
As well as infidelity, research has found that perceptions of mate scarcity known as low mate availability tend to also evoke sexual jealousy and increase intrasexual competition among men and women.[5] Evolutionary research demonstrates sex differences in response to sexual jealousy and methods for combating competition. Women prioritize improvement of their appearance, where men prioritize demonstration of wealth and strength through exhibition of resources and engagement in physical conflict with a competitor.[6]
Sexual jealousy may also differ across cultures. The tendency towards sexual jealousy may be influenced by sexual permissiveness in general culture as both U.S. males and females reported more distress to sexual infidelity than Chinese peers.[7]
Sexual jealousy in humans
Female sexual jealousy and parental investment
After choosing a mate, females bear the brunt of child production. Not only does the woman have to produce and carry the baby, in a majority of cultures she remains responsible for raising him or her. Because offspring are at such a high cost for the female, the male’s resource contribution could mean life or death for her and her child, weighing significantly on her fitness potential (Schutzwohl, 2008, 93). If a woman knows or suspects that her husband is being unfaithful, she will be more concerned that he is sharing his resources with another female, rather than making another baby (Schutzwohl, 2008, 93). As a result, for females, emotional infidelity is significantly more vexing than sexual infidelity. In a study done to determine the behavioral differences between men and women in terms of jealousy, researchers found that women were most upset when they found out, or suspected that their mate had given a gift to another woman, closely followed by spending time with another woman, and spending time thinking about another woman (de Weerth, 1993, 271). These are considered the worst offenses because the man is giving away both the monetary resources, and the time that he could be using to support his child. By giving a gift to another woman, the man may not directly take much away from the fitness of his primary mate, but he perpetuates a threat that he may shift all of his resources to another woman, which would be dramatically detrimental to the fitness of his primary mate, as well as her child. In the same study, women also self-reported more overall jealousy in relationships than men did. This is likely due to the parental investment costs that females incur – females have more to lose with an unfaithful spouse (de Weerth, 1993, 266-268).
One major factor in the shifting role of sexual jealousy between men and women is the widespread presence of contraception in the western world. If there is no risk that a long term mate is getting pregnant, the male no longer needs to worry about who will father his child. The woman, however, frequently still relies on the male for resources. Even if she does not have a child, society, to some degree, still dictates that a man must support his wife financially. Females on birth control must still be wary of the other women her husband is seeing for fear that he will abandon her, and she will not be able to support herself, or have children at all. This is not as much of a concern for men (Geary et al., 2001, 300).
Jealousy as a function of self-esteem
Bram Buunke’s research on the correlations between sexual jealousy, self-esteem and past participation in extramarital affairs found that women who are less sure of themselves experience or anticipate more jealousy, unless they have participated in extramarital affairs themselves. If a woman has had an extramarital affair, it is likely that she is more aware of the loss-risk, and is therefore less jealous when her partner is unfaithful. Meanwhile, women who experience low self-esteem are much more afraid that their partner is dissatisfied and being unfaithful (Buunke, 1982). These findings are supported by Khanchandani’s research on the effects of situational and personality variables on jealousy in college-aged women. She found that women who tested for lower self-esteem on the Rosenberg Self-Description Scale reported a higher coefficient of jealousy than women with higher self-esteem (Khanchandani et al., 2009).
Aggression, targets and induced jealousy in females
Contrary to statistics on spousal abuse in which men are the abusers (de Weerth, 1993, 274), women are more likely to report that their hypothetical sexual jealousy would manifest itself as anger and physical aggression. While both sexes reported experiencing sexual jealousy in relationships, as well as an interest in discussing the reasons for the infidelity, significantly more surveyed females claimed that they would cry, and then act aggressively toward their unfaithful spouse. Women also claimed that they would feign indifference as well as attempt to make themselves more physically attractive to their mate (de Weerth, 1993, 272).
There are some conflicting theories on who becomes the target of female sexual jealousy. One theory suggests that women are generally more inclined to feel empathy, so they empathize with “the other woman”, and target all of their aggression and anger at the unfaithful male (de Weerth 1993, 274). On the other hand, however, one study has suggested that because in a sexual relationship females are the discriminating one (the one choosing the mate), the female lends herself as a primary target for sexual jealousy. Therefore, a woman will preferentially direct her jealousy toward her rival female, even though it is her husband who is the unfaithful one. As a result, when a woman is around a suspected rival female, she is more likely than a male counterpart to announce that her companion is “taken,” and go out of her way to enhance her appearance to her spouse (Schutzwohl, 2008, 98).
In that same vein, Gregory White found that women are more likely to attempt to induce jealousy in their partner for some type of gain. Women who considered themselves to be in “low-power” positions in their relationships reported inducing jealousy in hopes that their partner would spend more time with them, or pay more attention to them (White, 1980). White believes that the inducement of jealousy is a manipulation of power on the female’s part, using the partner’s jealousy to gain influence in the relationship (White 1980).
Manifestations
The consequences of sexual jealousy among partners vary. Jealousy is one of the top three reasons for non-accidental homicides (Harris 2004). Sexual jealousy can lead to male aggression and possessiveness, but female physical aggression, such as kicking, slapping, or shoving a mate in anger, has also been observed after jealousy manifests (Denisiuk 2004). Men who are responsible for homicides due to sexual jealousy normally lash out against their wives, and sometimes their children too, after the woman tries to end the relationship (Wilson and Daly 1993). A common quote from jealous homicide killers that has been said is, “If I can’t have her nobody can.” Other frequent expressions husbands will use, proclaim that they will find their wives if they leave and kill them (Wilson and Daly 1993). Morbid jealously is another way to describe a jealous man who commits murders of his wife, and sometimes others, along with constant physical assault and/or abuse occurrences. Most morbidly jealous individuals require psychiatric help (Daly, Wilson, Weghorst 1982). Jealousy is also reported to produce other emotional responses such as fear, grief, depression, anger, and violent aggressions (Buunk and Hupka 1987).
References
- ↑ Template:Daly, M., Wilson, M., & Weghorst, S. J. (1982). Male sexual jealousy. Ethology and Sociobiology, 3(1), 11-27.
- ↑ Template:Harris, C. R. (2003). A review of sex differences in sexual jealousy, including self-report data, psychophysiological responses, interpersonal violence, and morbid jealousy. Personality and Social Psychology Review, 7(2), 102-128.
- ↑ Buss, David (2006). "Strategies of Human Mating" (PDF). Psychological Topics (Department of Psychology, Faculty of Arts and Sciences, Croatia) 15 (2): 239–260.
- ↑ "Chapman University. Research on jealousy: Impact of sexual vs. emotional infidelity". www.sciencedaily.com. 7 January 2015. Retrieved 2016-02-10.
- ↑ Arnocky, Steven; Ribout, Angela; Mirza, Reehan; Knack, Jennifer. "Perceived mate availability influences intrasexual competition, jealousy and mate-guarding behavior". Journal of Evolutionary Psychology 12 (1): 45–64.
- ↑ Sprecher, edited by John H. Harvey, Amy Wenzel, Susan (2004). The handbook of sexuality in close relationships (Transferred to digital print. ed.). Mahwah, NJ: Lawrence Erlbaum Associates. ISBN 0805845488.
- ↑ Geary, David. C.; Rumsey, Michael; Bow- Thomas, Christine, C.; Hoard, Mary K (September 1995). "Sexual Jealousy as a facultative trait: Evidence from the pattern of sex differences in adults from China and the United States". Ethology and Sociobiology 16 (5).
Further reading
- Barett, Louise, Robin Dunbar, and John Lycett (2002) Human Evolutionary Psychology. Princeton, NJ: Princeton University Press.
- Begley, Sharon. 28 Jan 2010. Of Sex and ‘Soulmates’. Newsweek.
- Buunke, Bram (1982). “Anticipated Sexual Jealousy: Its Relationship to Self-Esteem, Dependency, and Reciprocity.” Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin. 8: 310-316
- Buss, D. M., R. J. Larsen, D. Westen and J. Semmelroth (1992). Sex differences in jealousy: Evolution, physiology, and psychology. Psychological Science 3:251–255.
- Buss, D. M. (1995). Evolutionary psychology: a new paradigm for psychological science. Psychological Inquiry 6:1–30.
- Buss, David M. (1998). Jealousy on Mars and Venus. Volume 3.
- Daly, Martin, Margo Wilson, and Suzanne Weghorst (1982). “Male Sexual Jealousy.” Ethology and Sociobiology 3:11-27
- Daly, M. and Wilson, M. (1982). ‘Whom are newborn babies said to resemble?’ Ethology and Sociobiology 3:69-78.
- Denisiuk, Jennifer S. (2004). Evolutionary Versus Social Structural Explanations for Sex Differences in Mate Preferences, Jealousy, and Aggression. Rochester Institute of Technology.
- Deweerth, C, Kalma, AP (1993). “Female Aggression as a Response to Sexual Jealousy.” Aggressive Behavior. 19: 265-279
- Dickeman, M. (1979). ‘Female infanticide, reproductive strategies, and social stratification: a preliminary model’, in: N.A. Chagnon and W. Irons (eds) Evolutionary Biology and Human Social Behavior pp. 321–67. North Scituate (MA): Duxbury Press
- Gaulin, S. and Schlegel, A (1980). Paternal confidence and paternal investment: A cross-cultural test of a sociobiological hypothesis. Ethology and Sociobiology 1: 301-309
- Geary, David, DeSoto, M., Hoard, Mary, Sheldon, Melanie, Cooper M (2001). “Estrogens and Relationship Jealousy.” Human Nature. 12: 299-320
- Harris, Christine R. 2004. The Evolution of Jealousy. American Scientist. 92: 62-71.
- Hart, S., T. Field, C. del Valle and M. Letourneau (1998). Infants protest their mothers’ attending to an infantsize doll. Social Development 7:54–61.
- Kanchandani, Laveena, Durham, Thomas (2009). “Jealousy During Dating Among Female College Students.” College Student Journal. 43: 1272-1278
- Margo Wilson, Martin Daly. “The Man Who Mistook His Wife for a Chattel.” (1992, New York). Oxford University Press.
- R. D. Alexander and K. N. Noonan (1979), Concealment of ovulation, parental care and human social evolution. In: N. A. Chagnon and W. G. Irons, Editors, Evolutionary Biology and Human Social Behavior: an Anthropological Perspective, North Duxbury Press, Sciuate, pp. 436–453.
- Strassman, B.I. (1981). Sexual selection, paternal care and concealed ovulation in humans. Ethol. Sociobiol. 2: 31–40.
- Strassman, B.I. (1992) ‘The function of menstrual taboos among the Dogon: defense against cuckoldry?’ Human Nature 2: 89-131
- Strassman, B. I. (1996). Menstrual hut visits by Dogon women: A hormonal test distinguishes deceit from honest signaling. Behavioral Ecology, 7, 304–315.
- Schutzwohl, Achim (2008). “The Intentional Object of Romantic Jealousy.” Evolution and Human Behavior. 29: 92-99
- White, Gregory (1980). “Inducing Jealousy: A Power Perspective.” Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin. 6: 222-227
- Wilson, Margo and Daly, Martin (1993). Spousal Homicide Risk and Estrangement. Violence and Victims. 8: 3-13.
- Buss, David (2006). "Strategies of human mating" (PDF). Psychological Topics (Department of Psychology, Faculty of Arts and Sciences, Croatia) 15 (2): 239–260.