Santa Claus and His Old Lady

"Santa Claus and His Old Lady"
Single by Cheech and Chong
B-side Dave
Released December 1971
Genre Novelty, Christmas
Length 6:25
Label Ode Records
Writer(s) Cheech Marin
Tommy Chong
Producer(s) Lou Adler
Cheech and Chong singles chronology
Santa Claus and His Old Lady Sister Mary Elephant

Santa Claus and His Old Lady is a bit by Cheech and Chong, one of their best-known comedy routines. It was the duo's first single.

"Santa Claus and His Old Lady" did not appear on the duo's eponymous debut album, although the B-side, "Dave," did. It has since received continued airplay on radio stations during the Christmas season, particularly those that switch to temporary all-Christmas music formats.

Synopsis

The sketch begins with Cheech attempting to write a parody of ¿Dónde Está Santa Claus? (Spanish for Where is Santa Claus?) a Christmas song by Augie Rios from 1958, to little success. Chong enters, at which point he reveals that he has never heard of Santa Claus (Chong repeatedly mistakes Santa Claus for a musician).

Cheech then explains the story of Santa Claus, but from an unusual perspective: he and his wife began in the projects, after which (in no small part due to the cannabis-infused brownies Mrs. Claus became known for) they were driven out and formed a commune at the North Pole with a large group of midgets. Cheech explains that the reason Santa's sleigh can fly is because of the liberal use of "magic dust" and that an uncomfortable experience with Border Patrol as well as being attacked by "Southerners" who threatened to cut off his hair and beard that prompted him to go underground. According to Cheech, Santa Claus now works undercover as a Salvation Army bell-ringer, at which point Chong once again, and more certainly this time, asserts he really had played music with Santa Claus.

In contrast to most of their other sketches, Cheech and Chong play fictionalized versions of themselves in this bit. (Chong himself was a musician before beginning his collaboration with Cheech, most prominently as a songwriter and vocalist for Bobby Taylor & the Vancouvers in the late 1960s.)

B-side

The B-side was "Dave," one of the duo's earliest and most famous sketches. In this sketch, a man named Dave (Cheech) who is apparently on the run from the cops attempts to enter the locked apartment of his roommate (Chong), who will not answer the door. As Dave tries repeatedly to say his name to his roommate to let him in, the roommate instead thinks he is asking for Dave, and replies "Dave's not here."