King of the Hill (season 12)

When the guys take Bobby to a University of Texas football game their hijinks land them in a VIP box suite, where Hank is mistaken for a former player of the opposing Nebraska Cornhuskers, and is asked to call a crucial play for the team. Meanwhile, Peggy shops for a new TV after breaking the old one in a fit of rage.

Bobby feigns interest in activism when he goes after the heart of a real student activist, who protests the installation of soda machines in the school (and the funds from said soda machines being used to pay for the teachers' vacation).

Hank encourages Bobby to be a part of the school's Powder Puff team (a team where boys dress in drag and impersonate female cheerleaders). However, the boys learn that Peggy and the PTA are trying to put a stop to the tradition as they feel it's demeaning to women.

Arlen is hit by a heat wave and Hank takes the kids to the water park. Unfortunately, they have to tangle with a group of surfer bullies to enjoy the "Endless Wave." Meanwhile, Boomhauer tries to regain his coolness after two sexy ladies laugh at him for wearing cutoff jeans, and Bill becomes a local celebrity known as the "Heat Waver" after his car breaks down and he begins waving at passing motorists.

While at a Japanese restaurant, Cotton suffers a war flashback and ends up getting hospitalized after falling on the grill and suffering from a shrimp allergy, where Peggy learns that Cotton may not have long to live.^[3]

After buying tough, unsavory steaks at the Mega-Lo-Mart, Hank, at Appleseed's suggestion, visits the town co-op in search of better meat. After falling in love with the delicious organic food, Hank becomes a co-op volunteer and co-owner, but his business skills causes the co-op to sell out to Mega Lo-Mart.

Bobby's plans for a school carnival are ruined by a diversity expert who tricks the carnival committee into planning an assembly about racial and ethnic guilt. Meanwhile, Dale, Bill and Boomhauer try to get a reluctant Lucky to the hospital when he injures himself.

Minh joins the Arlen Gun Club to learn skeet shooting, a skill she hopes will make an exclusive country club want her and Kahn as members. Meanwhile, Hank tries to solve the mystery of who's been discarding trash in his trash cans.

Nancy wants Dale to get a new job since he is not making any money, so he and Hank go on a "vocation vacation" to learn basket weaving. Meanwhile Peggy, Kahn and Bill try to achieve Internet stardom by creating a wacky viral video.

The Hill's dog, Ladybird, suddenly begins acting erratically and is put on a list of vicious dogs, and, if Hank doesn't hire a spiritualist to cure her, Ladybird will be euthanized.

When the Arlen City Council bans the sale of foods containing trans fats (along with rare burgers and raw oysters), Sugarfoot's Restaurant goes out of business. Hank, who feels the ban is an infringement on freedom, encourages Strickland to fix things. Strickland's solution to the problem is to sell his delicious, trans-fatty foods on a lunch truck so he can evade the law.

Bill becomes involved with a single mother, Charlene, who once had an affair with John Redcorn, and, like Nancy Gribble, has a half-Native American child who, like Joseph Gribble, is ignorant of her biological father's identity. Meanwhile, Joseph falls for Charlene's daughter, but everyone tries to keep him away from her as the two are related.

Hank finds out his car salesman has been tricking him into paying more than he should when purchasing a car, and gets tangled in a botched plan cooked up by two college-aged activists.

Peggy inadvertently ruins Enrique's life when she sells a house in Enrique's neighborhood to a white hipster (voiced by Dax Shepard) who invites his hipster friends over to live in the same neighborhood. Meanwhile, Hank is asked to speak at Enrique's daughter Inez's quinceañera.

Tom Landry Middle School holds an emergency community meeting when Dooley goes missing in Arlen run by relationship expert Stephen Davies, who calls Peggy out on not keeping her family tight-knit.

Kahn's father-in-law, General Gum, visits the Souphanousinphone family. The General gives Kahn a hard time and makes him feel like a failure. Kahn becomes depressed until he stumbles upon a Laotian karaoke bar where he becomes a star singing "The Morning After".

Peggy brings in a family of struggling actors to sell a house currently occupied by the strangest family in Arlen, and ends up making the Hill house appealing to customers looking to buy a house.

Joseph becomes the star quarterback at Tom Landry Middle School, and gives the school hope that they'll actually win this year -- until a wealthy prep school offers Joseph a chance to play for their school.

Depressed over her past botched birthday parties, Peggy schedules a 1970s-style murder mystery party on a train, but when Dale ruins the surprise, thanks to Luanne's discovery of what her role is, a new mystery crops up — after Hank and Peg have sex in the train bathroom.

When Hank accidentally steals another man's wallet (thinking that the man pickpocketed him), the man begins exacting his revenge on Hank. Meanwhile, Bobby gets sentenced to spend the day with the school security guard after being framed for throwing a soda can at him and Dale attempts to get a job at a Hooters-esque restaurant called "Bazooms" by citing sexual discrimination if he is not hired. Paul Sorvino guest stars.

Hank and Bobby get in some father/son bonding time when Hank dumps the old team of Dale, Bill and Boomhauer to help Bobby in a boat-building competition. During the building process, Hank gets spooked by bats that invade the construction garage, forcing Bobby to do the building all alone.

Luanne's father/Peggy's brother Hoyt (voiced by Johnny Knoxville) returns to Arlen to stay with the family. Once he arrives, Peggy reveals to Hank that Hoyt (previously mentioned as being an oil rig worker who wasn't going to return to land until Leanne had died and her death certificate was faxed to him) is in truth a no-good ex-con and that she created the lie of him being an oil rig worker to allow Luanne to believe that she has at least one law abiding parent. Hoyt attempts to corrupt Lucky (who has recruited Hank in order to get him his driver's license and other forms of ID after he confesses to Luanne that he has none) and forces him to take the fall when Hoyt is arrested for possessing drugs. Peggy and Hank must then unite to save the day, by getting Hoyt arrested and getting Lucky to recant his confession.