This article concerns the fictional geography of Terry Pratchett's Discworld, featured in the novel series of the same name. The Discworld is a flat disc on the backs of four elephants, who are in turn on the back of a giant turtle, Great A'Tuin.
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The Disc itself is roughly 10,000 miles (16,000 km) wide, giving it a surface area two fifths that of the Earth. Its principal geographic feature - other than its flatness - is the Cori Celesti: a 10-mile-high (16 km) spire of rock that lies at the centre of the Disc and is the location of Dunmanifestin, the home of the Discworld's many gods. The central area of the Disc including the Cori Celesti is known as The Hub, a land of high, icebound mountains that serves as an analogue both to the Himalayas and to Earth's polar regions (since, although the Disc has no poles as such, it is as far as possible from the Disc's edge and thus the sun). The areas closer to the Rim are warmer and tropical, since the Disc's sun passes closer to them in its orbit. At the Rim, a great, encircling waterfall (the Rimfall) sends the Disc's oceans cascading into space. The Last Hero hints that the rocks jutting out from the Rimfall could be home to their own, as yet undiscovered cultures.
Cardinal directions within the Discworld are not given as North, South, East and West, but rather as directions relating to the disc itself: Hubward (towards the centre), Rimward (away from the centre) and to a lesser extent, turnwise (direction of the disc's rotation) and widdershins (against the direction of the disc's rotation). The disc rotates clockwise.
There are four main continents on the Disc, along with a number of geographical and political regions and islands. The majority of the Disc's landmass is composed of a single supercontinent comprising a large main region and a smaller Counterweight Continent, an island connected to an ice cap. The main region comprises the Unnamed Continent upon which most of the novels are set, and on the opposite side of the Circle Sea the Continent Klatch. The island continent of Fourecks is the smallest of the four, a parody of Australia, and the setting for the 22nd novel The Last Continent.
The Circle Sea is an almost landlocked body of water approximately halfway between the Hub and the Rim, opening at the Widdershins side into the Rim Ocean. The Circle Sea is analogous to the Mediterranean, in that it is bordered both by countries on the Sto Plains (Europe) and continent of Klatch (Middle East, North Africa). Its principal trading ports are Ankh-Morpork, on the Sto Plains coast, and Al Khali and Ephebe on the Rimwards side. Discworld civilization, which can broadly be defined as those countries that have invented the fork as well as the knife, is found around the Circle Sea's historic coasts. The countries around the Circle Sea are Ankh-Morpork, Ephebe, Djelibeybi, Klatch, Omnia and Tsort. The Circle Sea is the location of Leshp, an island that occasionally rises to the surface on a cushion of foul-smelling gas, before settling back to the seafloor once more. Leshp's last appearance sparked a near-war between Ankh-Morpork and Klatch in Jingo.
The most notable nation to lie on the Rim (it actually juts slightly over it) is Krull, an island kingdom whose economy is largely based on the capture and salvage of nautical wreckage as it heads towards the Rimfall. To aid in this, the Krullians constructed the Disc's largest manmade object; the Circumfence, a great net that extends across a third of the Disc's perimeter. Now in disrepair, it is still maintained by the occasional guardian, such as Tethis the sea troll.
Due to its unique position, Krull is one of the Disc's main centres of astronomical and astrological learning; indeed until recently, its high priest was also its chief astronomer. Krull possesses a magical University and, unlike the Unseen University in Ankh-Morpork, the Krullians have no problem educating female wizards. Krullians are noted for their habitual nervousness and fatalism, the product of spending their lives overlooking a bottomless black abyss of infinity. On the Disc, the phrase "being on edge" is a reference to the Krullians.
The nation's capital is also called Krull (featured in The Colour of Magic), and a local river is known as Hakrull river (mentioned in Mort).
The unnamed continent is the one on which most of the books are set. It is essentially the equivalent of Europe, and contains among other things the Sto Plains and Ramtops, as well as the more Eastern European lands around Überwald.
The Sto Plains are the rough analogue to Western Europe on the Discworld. They are a land of rich black loam, upon which rests a great squat forest of cabbages. The cabbage has an almost mythic status among the people of the Sto Plains, and is an emblem of its largest and dominant city, Ankh-Morpork. Most young people who leave the farming areas of the Plains for life in the big city would happily never see a cabbage again.
Although they have been an empire in the past, the Sto Plains currently exist as a loose collection of independent city-states, ruled over by a close-knit (and probably interrelated) ruling class. The Sto Plains could be thought of as being similar to Germany prior to the unification of the states into the German Empire, with no overall authority. According to Mort the area was to be united in the coming decades. As reality was given a retcon in the book, the Duke who united the Sto Plains was Mort, and he did it by diplomacy rather than conquest. In Soul Music, a footnote states various facts of the region:
The principal city of the Sto Plains is Ankh-Morpork, and while it does not exert any political power over its neighbors, its economic domination of the region (summed up by the phrase, "Attack us, and we'll call in your mortgages,") has meant that the smaller cities around it are essentially its satellites.
Pseudopolis, (its name translates to "false city,") is the nearest major city to Ankh-Morpork (approximately a half day's journey by horse) and is first mentioned in the first Discworld novel, The Colour of Magic. That novel also refers to Psephopololis, which according to The Discworld Mapp is the same place. The city is not to be confused with Pseudopolis Yard, the headquarters of the Ankh-Morpork City Watch - which is a reference to Scotland Yard. Pseudopolis possesses a school of magic, Braseneck College (a parody of Brasenose College, Oxford), which is apparently in competition for prestige with the larger, older Unseen University. As of Unseen Academicals the aristocracy of the city appear to have undertaken an experiment in representative democracy, much to Lord Vetinari's amusement. (Braseneck is also similar to the British term for someone who has a certain cheeky courage (see also moxie and chutzpah) - brass neck e.g. "He's got a brassneck coming in here after what he has done")
Eric Thursley lives/lived at 13 Midden Lane (Faust Eric). Charlie, a man with an extraordinary physical resemblance to Ankh-Morpork Patrician Havelock Vetinari, ran a clothes shop there (The Truth). Nobby Nobbs had an early career as an armourer in one of the Pseudopolis city militias. Curiously, (and this may be no more than a coincidence, although given Nobby's penchant for nicking and flogging anything not nailed down there may be a connection,) Pseudopolis always lost its wars at this period, because of an unaccountable shortage of weapons. John Keel, a city watchman, moved from Pseudopolis to Ankh-Morpork and was the mentor of the young Sam Vimes, (Night Watch.)
Quirm is most significant as the location of the Quirm College for Young Ladies (formerly attended by Susan Sto Helit) and the birthplace of Leonard of Quirm.
According to the books, Quirm is a quiet and peaceful town, and for this reason is a popular holiday destination, as well as where Morporkians go when they retire (including Lord Vetinari's aunt, Lady Roberta Meserole). In this regard, it relates to Ankh-Morpork as Eastbourne relates to London, or possibly as Spain relates to the United Kingdom. (Or even Greece as a description in Unseen Academicals describes Quirm as having "strange water", which is the typical stereotype of the Greek Water Supply.)
The Quirmian language is occasionally mentioned in the books as being similar to French or Spanish, but the only substantial appearance of the town (in Soul Music) had the inhabitants apparently speaking Morporkian (although the story is told from the perspective of Susan, who doubtless speaks fluent Quirmian). Spoken Quirmian is heard in Making Money, where it is identical to French, and Italian is, in Maskerade, spoken under the name of Brindisian. Quirm is famous for its floral clock; a circle of flowers, each of which opens its petals at a different hour. Quirm is also famous for its (blue-veined) cheese. Quirm is a duchy, ruled by the Rodley family. Members of this family seen in the books include Lord Rodley, an upper-class twit, in Mort and Brenda Rodley, the swamp dragon-breeding dowager duchess in Guards! Guards!. In Sourcery, Quirm was destroyed by wizards during a magical war, but was presumably restored by Coin when he put everything back as it was before the war.
The Quirm College for Young Ladies is an educational institution located in Quirm. In the books, Susan Sto Helit, Lady Sybil Ramkin and Miss Perspicacia Tick were educated there. The school's headmistress and founder is Miss Eulalie Butts (possibly a reference to Frances Buss). It is explained that, as few of the Discworld's higher-class schools (such as the Ankh-Morpork Assassins' Guild School), see fit to admit female students (although the Assassins have since changed this policy), Miss Butts founded the College "on the astonishing principle that, since gels had nothing much to do until someone married them, they might as well occupy the time with learning things." (Soul Music).
The school resembles a traditional English independent girls' school, with an academic curriculum and a heavy emphasis on respectable and decent behaviour. The school's strong emphasis on decency reportedly makes it rather difficult to teach certain areas of Biology. Students come out of that class "with the vague idea that they were supposed to marry a rabbit." (Soul Music) Students at the school do not seem to be preparing for any particular profession. As the known universities on the Disc are solely for wizards (who must be male - see Unseen University), and most other higher education institutions on the Disc do not admit females, there is no clear lifelong aim for the school's alumni. Susan Sto Helit describes it as "an education in, well, education" (Hogfather). It appears that those students who do not marry upon leaving school generally go into the teaching profession themselves, or become governesses. Staff include Miss Butts, the Headmistress, Miss Delcross, the Biology mistress and "Iron Lily", the gym mistress.
Sto Lat, ruled by Queen Kelirehenna, is located about 20 miles from Ankh-Morpork.
According to the books, Sto Lat is a sizable walled town in the Sto Plains, although eclipsed enormously both in size and influence by the neighbouring city of Ankh-Morpork. Sto Lat is located about 20 miles from the city of Ankh-Morpork, to which it is connected by two clacks towers. It encompasses a large boulder emerging out of the Sto Plains like 'a geological pimple', left there by the retreating Ice Giants. The castle is built into this rock.
Its most recent king before the present monarch was King Olerve, who was shot with a crossbow by an assassin hired by the original Duke of Sto Helit, a thoroughly nasty man who staged a bid for the succession, thwarted only by Mort in Mort. At the end of Mort, Princess Keli became Queen.
Politically, Sto Lat is the capital of a kingdom ruled by Queen Kelirehenna, which includes Sto Helit, Sto Kerrig and the Eight Protectorates. Her authority is exercised through a Mayor. The kingdom was one of the first places outside Ankh-Morpork to adopt its own stampings for the post.
Astolat is a legendary location in Arthurian mythology, and Sto lat is also a traditional Polish song equivalent to Happy Birthday to You ("sto lat" literally means "hundred years").
Sto Helit is a duchy within Sto Lat, which was given to Mort in Mort, after he'd saved Queen Kelirehenna. After his death in Soul Music, his duchy apparently was passed to his daughter, Susan. She works as a teacher now, but, apparently, as of Thief of Time, she still is duchess of Sto Helit.
The Ramtops are the Discworld's principal mountain range. Across their vast extent, from the Hub to the Rim, they incorporate elements from virtually every noted mountain range on our world, from the Scottish Highlands (Lancre) to the Himalayas (the High Tops) to Appalachia (Slice). They are the Disc's main magical conduit, as they lie like a metal rod across the centre of the Disc's magical field (indeed, the source of the field, the Cori Celesti, is technically part of the Ramtops), and are thus alive with unreality. Portals to various otherworlds dot the range's hidden crevices; "gnarly ground" compresses vast areas of land into tiny patches, and where witches, wizards, and godlike monks alike practice their arts within these secluded communities.
Due to a relative rarity of horizontal flat surfaces (vertical flat surfaces are plenty), kingdoms in the Ramtops tend to be small, isolated, and sparsely populated. Much of the economy is agrarian and communities largely consist of loosely affiliated groups of self-sufficient farms. The Ramtops are known for their harsh winters; snow drifts can rise up to fifteen feet during the worst storms. "Ramtoppers have 18 words for snow," Pratchett says, "none of them printable."
Pratchett has mentioned that the name of the Ramtops comes from RAMTOP (i.e. top of RAM, or random-access memory), a system variable in the ZX Spectrum computer.
Lancre is situated in the Ramtop mountains, about 500 miles Hubwards of the city of Ankh-Morpork. It is the best-known of hundreds of tiny countries in the Ramtops, occupying a vertiginous shelf looking over the Sto Plains.
Lancre is based mainly on rural areas of Southern England with which Pratchett was familiar. In an article in Folklore entitled, ‘Imaginary Worlds, Real Stories,' Pratchett writes, "the kingdom of Lancre [...] I suspect is a somewhat idealised version of the little fold in the Chiltern Hills where I grew up, stirred in with the western area of the Mendips where I spent a great deal of my adult life.".[1] Pratchett has described the tiny country as "solid folklore"; it is the place all the legends of our world's countryside really happened. Ankh-Morpork serves a similar function for urban folklore, but not as blatantly. The name seems to echo Lancashire and the associated witch trials in Pendle in that county in the seventeenth century.
Part of the reason for this is that the Ramtops are a major earthing point for the Discworld's magical field. Headless horsemen and walking trees are part of the landscape, as are witches. Lancre is famous for witches, especially since the publication of The Joye of Snackes (an erotic cookbook) by "A Lancre Witch", i.e. Nanny Ogg. Lancre also contains a gateway into the "parasite universe" of the elves.
The other thing Lancre is famous for is young people going off and seeking their fortunes (usually in Ankh-Morpork).
Although most maps show Lancre to measure roughly 40 miles by 10 miles in size, its true area remains unknown—partly because of its mountainous terrain and the fact that it borders on the Ramtops, but also due to the warping effect of high level of background magic. Owing to this background magic, geography in certain areas of Lancre can take on additional properties that exist either outside, or in addition to, the conventional geographic dimensions.
Such areas include the Lancre Moors, where reality can become folded into deep troughs and ridges known as Gnarly ground. This can create the illusion that two points in space are adjacent, when in reality they are several miles apart, or vice versa. The effect, as mentioned in The Discworld Companion is that Lancre contains more landscape than a kingdom of its apparent size should be able to contain. (A similar magical effect occurs in the Unseen University Library, which has a diameter of 100 yards, but an infinite radius.)
"Gnarly Ground" can be detected by those with magical senses, or those with keen eyesight who observe how clouds and shadows appear to fracture as they pass across it. Flying over such areas is not for the faint-hearted and walking across it can be fraught with peril for the unwary.
Similarly, Lancre contains areas where the landscape echoes the state of mind of those who pass through it, leading confident travellers to find babbling brooks while, in the same place at the same time, disheartened travellers find deep valleys and raging mountain torrents.
Though it is not clear if the phenomenon is related to background magic, Lancre also serves as the physical location for (possibly two) independent gateways to a "parasite universe" inhabited by Elves.
In times past, Elven incursions were common. Both gateways have been sealed from the Lancre side by standing stones made from thunderbolt iron, a form of meteoric ore which is one of the few sources of magnetism on the Disc; humans, but not Elves (except in exceptional circumstances), may pass through them.
The capital "city" of Lancre is Lancre Town, by dint of being slightly bigger than the other villages, and containing Lancre Castle. Due to Elven incursions, Lancre Castle was built to an exaggerated scale in order to accommodate fleeing citizens.
Bad Ass is the home of Granny Weatherwax. It got its name when a donkey, carrying the supplies of a group of settlers, stopped on a ford and refused to move, forcing them to build their town there. This is possibly a reference to the founding of Amsterdam, which according to legend was on the spot that two fishermen's seasick dog vomited upon reaching land. The valley occupied by Bad Ass overlooks a panorama of lesser mountains and foothills. From there, you can see to the edge of the world. In the long winter snows, the roads out of the village are lined with boards to reduce drifting and to stop travellers from straying. A narrow bridge over a stream leads to the village smithy, birthplace of Eskarina Smith.
The lands around the Hub, also called the High Tops, are icy, mountainous and cold. They are also the areas closest to the Cori Celesti, and so are crackling with magic. They are roughly equivalent to Earth's Himalayas, being home to Yeti and various Buddhist-style monastic orders, such as the History Monks, which give the area the nickname "Enlightenment Country". They are also the closest thing the Disc has to a pole, and so are home to its equivalent of polar bears and walruses, mentioned in The Last Hero.
The countries in the foothills of the Ramtops retain the rural, agrarian character of the mountains, but possess their own unique cultures.
Überwald (German pronunciation: [ˈyːbɐvalt]) is a region located near the foot of the Ramtops, farther from Ankh-Morpork than Lancre is.
Its name is German for "over the woods," as a play on Transylvania, (which is Latin for "across the woods." In fact, this name was actually used for Transylvania in some documents from the 13th century.) The region is based less on the real Eastern Europe, and more on the Hammer Horror stereotype of the area. In keeping with the Discworld's affinity for narrative, Überwald's climate and conditions contrive to fulfil human expectations: for example, Überwaldian thunderclaps occur whenever someone makes a particularly forceful pronouncement. In The Truth this phenomenon is referred to as "psychotropic weather".
The spelling of the German-language word is certainly "Überwald." The usage in some of the books is uneven, but the later narratives use "Uberwald" exclusively. In Carpe Jugulum, Pratchett writes:
On the rare maps of the Ramtops that existed, it was spelled Überwald. But Lancre people had never got the hang of accents and certainly didn't agree with trying to balance two dots on another letter, where they'd only roll off and cause unnecessary punctuation.
The region was previously united under the rule of the Unholy Empire (a play on the Holy Roman Empire), which had a two-headed bat as its symbol (a play on the double headed eagle). The Empire has long since collapsed leaving the area fragmented, chaotic, and under the rule of lore, not law (the two words pun when spoken with certain British accents).
Although Überwald has a large human population, they play a secondary role in the region's history. It is ruled by dwarfs, vampires, and werewolves. Sergeant (later Captain) Angua of the Ankh-Morpork City Watch is from an old aristocratic family of Uberwald werewolves. While there are indeed a number of human barons, they all tend to be uninterested in politics, preferring instead to dabble in experimental surgery and "Meddling In Things Man Was Not Meant To Wot Of," each with the help of their personal Igors.
From the 'Diet of Bugs' (a play on the Diet of Worms) onwards garlic and silver were considered contraband across Überwald until the events of The Fifth Elephant; the undead simply promised they would not be needed. Apparently this system left something to be desired.
Überwald's economy is apparently based on mining. Though precious metals are plentiful, the most crucial mineral resource is fat, which is believed to have been deposited by a fifth great Discworld-bearing elephant, which was dislodged from the back of Great A'Tuin and crashed into the ground around Überwald. Boiling fat rising to the surface is the reason for the country's many hot springs.
Überwald effectively comprises two utterly distinct societies; the dwarfs, (who exist below in their cavernous cities and tunnels,) and everybody else, who live above on the surface. By tradition, the laws of the surface people do not apply underground, and vice-versa. Überwaldian dwarfs are far more hidebound and traditional than their cousins near the Sto Plains, which has led to a certain culture clash between the two (cf. marching season). Überwald is the centre of Dwarfish history and politics; the Low King, the final arbiter of Dwarfish law, has his seat of power in the underground Überwald city of Schmaltzberg, (a double or even triple play on the Austrian town of Salzburg: Schmaltz means lard or fat in German, but can also mean 'excessive sentimentality').
Koom Valley is a location somewhere in Uberwald. Hundreds of years ago, the trolls and the dwarfs met in a battle at Koom Valley in which each side apparently ambushed the other. Nowadays, dwarfs celebrate the Battle of Koom Valley Day, on the same day that trolls celebrate Troll New Year. Sometimes, in a city where both dwarfs and trolls live (e.g. Ankh-Morpork), the two groups are careful enough to plan their celebratory marches so that they are on the same street. Some people (e.g. Susan Sto Helit), after carefully studying history books, point out that the Battle of Koom Valley seemed to have been repeated several times. The name comes from the Welsh word cwm, which means "valley".
Borogravia is located Rimwards of Überwald, on the Discworld's unnamed main continent. The capital city is PrinceMarmadukePiotreAlbertHansJosephBernhardtWilhelmsberg. The recent history of Borogravia consists mainly of fighting wars with every other country in the area (most notably Zlobenia), for various ill-defined reasons. The current war with Zlobenia has gone on for so long that nobody can remember what it was about. Borogravia is a Duchy, and as such is ruled by a Duke or Duchess. The ruler at the time of Monstrous Regiment was Duchess Annagovia, who has achieved virtual godhood among the people. The Borogravians' principal god is (or rather was) Nuggan. Prayers to the Duchess generally ask for intercession with Nuggan. At some point (see Thief of Time) Borogravia was noted for its chocolate. However, since Nuggan disliked chocolate, this may no longer be the case. In Night Watch, it is mentioned in passing that Borogravia has invaded Mouldavia.
Zlobenia with its capital Rigour, a parody of Riga, is a principality ruled by Prince Heinrich, who is described as tall, handsome, and smug. It has fought numerous wars with Borogravia, usually territorial disputes over the River Kneck, which forms the border between the two nations and frequently changes its course after flooding. Zlobenia's soldiers wear blue uniforms. Borogravians call Zlobenians 'swede eaters'. Heinrich has visions of making Zlobenia "the Ankh-Morpork of the mountains", much to the amusement of Samuel Vimes. Heinrich is also heir to the Borogravian throne after the death of the Duchess Annagovia. In Monstrous Regiment he declares war against Borogravia to assert his claim.
The Chalk is an area of rolling chalk downland near Lancre, bearing a great resemblance to Pratchett's native Wiltshire. The "soft" geology of the area is, according to some mountain witches, not conducive to the channelling of magic. In fact this is a misconception (the bones of the hills are flint), and powerful witches can and do reside there, although the local baron has outlawed witchcraft, meaning they do not identify themselves as such. This law has since been repealed or at least ignored by the new baron since Tiffany Aching began openly practicing magic there. Home of Tiffany Aching.
Llamedos is a land noted for its druids, its bards, and its rain. Rain is the chief export of Llamedos; it has rain mines.[2] Holly is the one plant that can grow in Llamedos's climate; everything else just rots. Llamedos is run by druids, who dot the land with stone circles used for computation. This is a lifetime job, since they frequently need upgrading. Llamedos is a fairly obvious parody of the British constituent country Wales. Its annual bardic competition, the Eisteddfod, is still held in Wales. The name is a reference to Dylan Thomas's radio play "Under Milk Wood", for which he created the fictitious Welsh town of Llareggub ("bugger all" spelled backwards). Llamedos, accordingly, is "Sod 'em all", spelled backwards. The inhabitants tend to speak with a doubled-L accent, i.e. "Llots of lluck!" Homeland of Imp Y Celyn.
The Octarine Grass Country is an area of rich farmland which, thanks to its proximity to the Ramtops, also happens to be saturated with magic—so much so, in fact, that it is possible to grow re-annual crops; crops that germinate and grow the spring before you plant them. This is the homeland of Mort. The Octarine Grass Country predominantly features in Reaper Man where Death goes to work under the name Bill Door.
Far beyond the Sto Plains and the Ramtops, yet still on the Unnamed Continent, lie a number of disparate cultures, most of which have only been mentioned briefly in the novels; these include Brindisi, a very Italianate culture, and No Thingfjord, a Nordic culture of ice and interminable sagas.
The most notable region beyond the Sto Plains is the small city of Genua, a Morporkian-speaking nation that bears some resemblance to New Orleans. Its most significant appearance in the books is in Witches Abroad. It is in an area called the Swamplands, some distance from the Sto Plains/Ramtops locations of most of the books.
The name Genua is probably based on Genoa, a city in Italy. However, Genua bears a striking resemblance to the French and Caribbean-influenced American South, especially New Orleans. Local transport is by paddle steamer with onboard gambling. The local witch, Erzulie Gogol, is a Voodoo mambo complete with personal zombie (in her case, that of the former ruler of the principality, Baron Saturday, who himself shares a name with a famous Voodoo god) and the local food is basically Cajun cuisine, including gumbo.
During the events of Witches Abroad the city was ruled by an evil fairy godmother, Lily Weatherwax, (sister of Lancre witch Esme Weatherwax) though she went by the name Lilith de Tempscire. She was obsessed with fairy tales and thought she could force everyone to be happy if only she could get them to follow the logic of the "happy ending." Under her rule, innkeepers who were not fat and jolly or inclined to tell jokes were sent to the dungeon, and Genua's ruler, the Baron Saturday, was murdered so that his heir apparent, Ella, could be a neglected orphan, as the tales dictated. Soon, the city began to resemble a skewed version of Disneyland. The name "Genua" therefore could also be an ironic echo of "genuine", which is exactly what Genua, at this time, was not. Eventually, thanks to the efforts of the Lancre Coven, Lily was deposed and sent to a dimension of endless mirrors, and Ella was able to assume her role as Baroness of Genua without, as Lily had intended, marrying a frog.
Genua was most likely established as a far flung colony of the Morporkian Empire, thus explaining why it shares more similarities with Ankh-Morpork/Sto Plains than its immediate neighbours Überwald and Muntab. The state first gained power under General Tacticus, who, having being sent there by the Morporkian Empire to stay out of the way, proceeded to declare war on Ankh-Morpork.
According to the novel Going Postal, Genua is located approximately 2000 miles from Ankh-Morpork by road, a journey of two months by stagecoach. A faster method is to travel by flying broomstick, whereby the city can be reached in a single day, but unfortunately you will most likely blow your own ears off or possibly just freeze to death on the way.
The continent of Klatch consists of that part of the Discworld's super continent that is rimwards of the Circle Sea. Like the distinction between Europe and Asia, the difference between Klatch and the unnamed continent that Ankh-Morpork stands upon is arbitrary and cultural rather than geographically evident. The continent includes the Circle Sea states of Ephebe, Tsort, Djelibeybi, Omnia, and the more rimwards territories of Howondaland, Tezumen Empire, Betrek, Smale, Klatchistan, and Muntab. It can be thought of as roughly equivalent to Africa in our world.
In the words of Terry Pratchett: "Not loosely based on Africa at all. Honestly."
The continent's principal nation, also called Klatch, is a large multi-ethnic empire rimwards to turnwise of the Circle Sea. It resembles medieval Arabic states, and has a political system similar to the Ottoman Empire. Its capital is Al Khali (popularly known as 'the Gateway to the mysterious continent of Klatch'), and it includes outlying regions such as Hersheba and Syrrit. Klatch is a commercial rival of Ankh-Morpork — the book Jingo depicts a brief war between the two mainly on economic land ownership grounds. It is also a common metaphorical boundary for anything considered genuinely "foreign", despite other areas of similar distance not being considered as such. There is some cultural mistrust between the Sto Plains and Klatch, as evidenced by the phrase "Pardon my Klatchian" upon speaking a rude word.
Despite the tendency of Morporkians to see Klatchians as savages, Jingo makes clear that Klatchians are technologically and scientifically far in advance of the Sto Plains. It is said that the Klatchians had 15 words for assassination before the rest of the world had caught on to the idea of hitting each other with rocks. This situation parallels that which existed between Europe and the Arab world throughout the Middle Ages. The ruler of Klatch is called the Seriph (perhaps a play on caliph, sherif/sharif and serif). In Sourcery, the Seriph was Creosote, a rather vain and foolish man who was obsessed with poetry. A genie reportedly granted a great fortune to his grandfather, which was more or less squandered by modern times. It is unknown whether Creosote is still Seriph; the Prince Cadram and Prince Khufurah appeared in Jingo, but it is unknown whether they are relatives of Creosote. The "Klatchian Foreign Legion" parodies French military activities in North Africa. The name is probably a play on "coffee klatsch"; a recognition of its most famous export, Klatchian coffee. The principal deity of Klatch is Offler, a crocodile-headed god.
Al Khali has been described by Rincewind as "like Ankh, only with sand instead of mud". It is bisected by the Tsort River. The city is noted for its wind, which blows from the vast deserts of Klatch, and has been described as "a gentle but persistent breeze". Notable features of the city include:
A strong, nearly magical coffee, brewed in Klatch and drunk only by the initiated in very small cups. Presumably an exaggerated version of Turkish coffee, Klatchian coffee has a strong sobering effect, bringing the drinker "to the other side of sobriety". This state of sobriety is referred to as knurd ("drunk" spelled backwards; compare the entry in the Jargon File[3]). Knurdness is described as the opposite of being drunk: not sober, which is merely the absence of drunkenness, but just as far away from sobriety in the opposite direction, resulting in a terrible, existential clarity. According to Sourcery, being knurd strips away all the comforting illusions in which people usually spend their lives, letting them see and think clearly for the first time. This is a very traumatic experience, although it is noted that it sometimes leads to important discoveries. To counteract the effects of Klatchian coffee, in Klatch it is drunk with Orakh (a very violent alcoholic beverage made by mixing scorpion venom and cactus sap and fermenting it in the sun for several weeks), possibly referring to Italian "expresso" coffee which is often drunk with "grappa", a very strong, often homemade, alcohol (although the name "Orakh" is presumably a reference to arak). After a few screams, a lie down and a stiff drink, the occasional drinker will try never to be "knurd" again.
Although knurdness is a state usually only obtainable by drinking Klatchian coffee, Samuel Vimes, one of the Discworld's most notable characters, is described in Guards! Guards! as being naturally two drinks short of actual sobriety. This makes him slightly knurd by default, which partially accounts for his depressive nature and tendency towards alcoholism—he started out looking for a cure to knurdness. Once he starts drinking, however, he cannot stop and always gets the dosage wrong.
From the novels Small Gods and Pyramids the location of certain nations on the Klatchian coast can be determined; Djelibeybi separates Tsort and Ephebe, and Ephebe borders (an undetermined border in uninhabitable desert) Omnia.
Ephebe is largely the Discworld analogue of Athenian Greece, however also takes influences from Alexandria and Minos; the name is an Anglicization of the Greek concept of ephebos. Ephebe lies on the hubwards shores of the Circle Sea on the Klatchian continent, widdershins of the Klatchian Empire, Tsort and Djelibeybi and turnwise of Omnia.
Ephebe has only been visited twice in the novels, in Pyramids and Small Gods. However, we know from Eric that in its early history, it fought a series of damaging wars against Tsort, with which it remains in a cold-war situation to this day. The disappearance of the Djel River valley in Pyramids briefly sparked a resumption of hostilities, which mostly involved highly reluctant soldiers hiding in wooden horses, waiting for the other side to take them into the city. This was quickly ended by the Djel's abrupt reappearance. In Small Gods, it was briefly invaded by Omnia; however, this occupation quickly collapsed and Ephebe launched a decisive counter-strike.
The country was heavily affected by the first temporal shattering mentioned in Thief of Time, as a result of which the philosophers living there appear extraordinarily long-lived. Ephebe has a population of about 50,000, according to The Discworld Companion. Much of this population is made up of slaves, who have steadfastly refused any efforts to give them more rights; they are quite happy with their guaranteed income and safety as slaves (and the possibility of owning slaves of their own).
As a democracy, Ephebe is unusual on the Discworld. Those citizens who are not disqualified by being foreigners, mad, poor or female, elect a Tyrant to run the city, who invariably turns out to be a criminal madman. They then elect another Tyrant, who is much the same. At the time of Small Gods (the role of which in the Discworld chronology is somewhat obscure), Ephebe was ruled by a small, fat man with skinny legs, who resembled an egg hatching upside-down. It is unknown whether he is still ruler.
According to The Discworld Companion, it does not have an economy. The people are perfectly happy living off the fish and olives farmed by the slaves, or the way Teppic described it in Pyramids, they made wine of everything they could stuff in a bucket and ate whatever couldn't crawl out of one, which gives time for Ephebe's major export: philosophy. For what it's worth (about one Ankh-Morpork penny), the currency of Ephebe is the talent. Ephebe is a city of philosophers; some hardware merchants have taken to stocking towels, in case of clothing-challenged brilliant thinkers. The philosophers are noted for pondering the existence of gods, but carefully in case the gods get mad. Brawls between varying philosophical factions frequently erupt across Ephebe's many taverns, but Ephebe is on the whole a peaceful city, which ambles by from day to day (The New Discworld Companion). One of the philosophers Teppic met in Ephebe was instrumental in the building of a lighthouse. Sadly, the proposed location for the lighthouse was deemed to be disruptive to the view of the harbour and so it was placed some distance inland. Sailors who find themselves stranded on the rocks of the harbour have considered the lighthouse a quite beautiful thing to look at whilst waiting to be rescued.
Djelibeybi is based on the cultures of Ancient Egypt. Also called the Kingdom of the Sun and the Old Kingdom. Principal crops: melons, garlic and, since they are increasingly encroaching on the fertile agricultural land, pyramids. The name "Djelibeybi" is a pun lost on most people outside the UK, South Africa and Australia, playing on "Jelly baby", a popular gummi sweet in those countries. The joke is compounded when Pratchett says that "Djelibeybi" means "Child of the Djel" (its main river; the line is a parody of Herodotus's famous claim that Egypt was the "gift of the Nile"). Djelibeybi is two miles (3 km) wide and 150 miles (240 km) long and is on the Circle Sea coast of Klatch. The ancient country of Ur lies to the Rimward of it. The kingdom is almost entirely underwater during the flood season, and both threatened and protected on either side by stronger neighbours (Tsort and Ephebe). It was once great, but all that now remains is an expensive palace, a few ruins and pyramids. The entire economic life of the country is, until after the events of Pyramids, devoted to building them. As a result, Djelibeybi is permanently bankrupt. The country has an enormous number of local gods, unknown to the world outside. Its ruler, the Pharaoh, is also a god, although in human form. He wears a gold mask (the Face of the Sun) and during his official functions carries the Flail of Mercy, the obsidian Reaping Hook of Justice, the Honeycomb of Increase, the Asp of Wisdom, the Sheaf of Plenty, the Gourd of the Water of the Heavens, the Three-Pronged Spear of the Waters of the Earth, the Cabbage of the Vegetative Increase and the Scapula of Hygiene. Under the current ruler, Queen Ptraci I, it is quite likely that the mask has been sold and the money spent on plumbing.
Tsort: A mythical place (no books have yet been set there, with the possible exception of the events portrayed in Eric where Rincewind and Eric Thursley appear briefly), the Disc's analogue to ancient Troy. Its enmity with Ephebe began with the famous Tsortean War, when King Mausoleum of Tsort kidnapped Queen Eleneor of Ephebe, leading to a siege that lasted for decades. To this day Tsort and Ephebe believe there is a place for giant wooden horses in combat. Tsort possesses a Great Pyramid, although pyramid-building has long been out of fashion and - no doubt because of the example of nearby Djelibeybi - modern Tsorteans scorn the things. Tradition claims Tsort was razed by the armies of Ephebe under Lavaeolus, and that it was home to the famed Tsortean Knot until the Knot was undone — sliced in half — by Carelinus. The people of Tsort worship all manner of gods, some of which seem to comprise all the bits the other gods had left over. The river Tsort bisects the desert rimwards of Al Khali.
Omnia is a desert theocracy ruled by the Cenobiarch, the head of the Omnian Church, from the Citadel in the capital city of Kom (a sort of cross between Jerusalem and the Vatican). There is also a connection to the Latin word 'Omnis', meaning all or everything, ironic due to the nations unipolar outlook). When Omnianism was an intolerant religion it was known for its imperialism, as it conquered neighbouring countries in the name of the Great God Om. After Brutha became the Cenobiarch, the country reversed directions, and became the home of a renowned theological college and library. These days it is known for the constant arguing amongst the clergy, as new interpretations of Brutha's teachings spring up every day. The currency of Omnia is the obol.
Howondaland is the Discworld's principal "jungle" region. It lies on the Klatchian continent, and is the Disc's rough analogue to Sub-Saharan Africa, although the Tezumen Empire gives it Mesoamerican overtones as well. Howondaland is not so much a country as a blank patch on the map. Just as "darkest Africa" remained largely unexplored until the 19th century, "darkest Klatch" is largely unknown to most Discworlders. Exploration of the land has been hampered by the habit of explorers ending up nailed to trees. Its name is probably a play on Gondwanaland or perhaps a play on the expression "How on earth ...?" transformed into "How on the land... ?" There is also an echo of Lewis Carroll's "Wonderland" in the name. In some of the early Discworld novels (American publications) it is spelled "Howonderland."
The Great Nef is a vast desert on the Klatchian continent, noted mainly for containing the Dehydrated Ocean, an ocean consisting of dehydrated water. Dehydrated water is a peculiar substance found only in areas of high magical concentration. It resembles fine sand, but can be reconstituted into normal water by adding water. The Dehydrated Ocean is home to its own, unique, kinds of fish. The name "Nef" is a reversal of fen, a type of wetland; "Great Nef" in particular may be a reference to the Great Fen, an historical wetland area in England in the area now known as The Fens and the subject of a restoration effort known as the Great Fen Project.
Only briefly mentioned in the books, Hersheba is a small desert kingdom rimwards of Klatchian empire, practically on the more-or-less vague boundary of Howondaland. The country is said to be ruled by a queen who lives forever (probably a reference to H. Rider Haggard's She). The nomadic tribes known as the D'regs occupy areas of Hersheba as well as Klatch. Depredations against Klatch by Hersheban D'regs, Hersheba by Klatchian D'regs and both sides by their own D'regs has led to the border being in a permanent state of war. The name is a play on Hershey bar and also resembles Israeli Beersheba; Pratchett initially suggested it as an alternative name for Djelibeybi, to aid American readers mystified by the pun.
Very little is known about the Theocracy of Muntab. Its ruler is known as a Pash (Lu-Tze, the History Monk, once had to make sure one of them choked on a fishbone). It is often used as a generic third-world country, as in "Eat your dinner, there are starving children in Muntab who'd be glad to have that!" It is more or less on the border between the continent of Klatch and the Unnamed Continent, and is located more or less rimwards of Borogravia. Muntab is known to be eager to emerge as a dominant nation in the modern world, and is suspected to have ambitions to conquer the hubward nations, most notably Borogravia. As a result, it figures into the famous political problem, the Muntab Question - most often quoted as "Where's Muntab?", but in serious political discussion is more likely to concern which side the more developed nations would fall in a war between Muntab and Borogravia. Muntab is very likely one of the nations in the Alliance that Borogravia is fighting in the novel Monstrous Regiment. Muntab's calendar counts down. No-one really knows why, but it's probably NOT a good idea to stay there to see for oneself what happens when the count reaches zero.
Nothing is known of Istanzia, although it is a state big enough to send an Ambassador to Ankh-Morpork for Commander Vimes to frighten: when in The Fifth Elephant the Istanzian forces were reported to be making repeated armed incursions across the Slipnir river, Vimes's offer to arrange for the Istanzian Ambassador to "...go home in an ambulance" resulted in the Istanzian forces pulling back so far that they were "...nearly in the next country."
The Tezumen Empire is a jungle civilisation in the darkest depths of Howondaland that resembles the Aztecs. They are renowned as the most pessimistic and angst-ridden culture on the Disc; their writing is engraved on giant slabs of stone rather than more conveniently written on paper, the better to beat yourself to death against when finished. Large discs of precisely-carved stone with holes in the middle are used for almost every imaginable purpose except making wheels, a technology which they have not yet discovered. Before the events in Eric, they worshiped the "feathered boa" Quezovercoatl, a parody of the Mesoamerican deity Quetzalcoatl, but have since tired of gods and killed all their priests.
The Counterweight Continent is situated on the opposite edge of the Discworld from the Unnamed Continent and Klatch. It is smaller than these other two landmasses but acts as a counterweight because its crust is made up largely of gold and octiron, both dense, heavy metals. It is (roughly) comma-esque in shape, and the tip of the comma extends all the way up to the ice cap at the Hub. Its closest point to the Unnamed Continent is about 15 miles away but, as the channel is under an ice cap, it is often referred to as an isthmus. The cultures of the Counterweight Continent are a play upon those of our world's Far East, or at least Western perceptions of it. In a pun on the Orient, it is also known as the Aurient, from the Latatian (Latin) word 'aurum' (gold), meaning 'the place where gold comes from'.
The Agatean Empire is the home of Twoflower and the Luggage. The country was first mentioned in the very first Discworld novel The Colour of Magic, but was not explored: its main role was as the place from which Twoflower had come. It appeared in a brief segment of Mort, and was the setting for most of Interesting Times.
The Agatean Empire is similar to feudal Japan or Imperial China, most obviously in the vast wall that surrounds it, and the belief that anyone from outside the Empire must be an invisible vampire ghost (probably a play on gwailo, lit. ghost man). The name is a pun on the term "Jade Empire," referring to ancient China.
The crust of the Agatean Empire is composed largely of gold, octiron and other heavy metals. In Ankh-Morpork and its environs, the Empire is known as the Aurient - 'the place where the gold comes from' (a pun on Orient and aurum, the Latin for gold). Exchange rates between the Ankh-Morpork dollar and the Empire's currency, the rhinu, has never been established because the solid gold coins are worth significantly less on the Counterweight Continent than on the Sto Plains.
The Empire was founded by the Emperor One Sun Mirror thousands of years ago and until fairly recently it was ruled by a number of constantly fighting and somewhat psychotic noble families (the Hongs, the Sungs, the Fangs, the Tangs and the McSweeneys), all jockeying to be emperor. They viewed politics as similar to chess; the goal was to put one's opponent in an untenable position, and the best way to do that was to take as many opposing pieces as possible. And it did not matter if you sacrificed your own pawns.
As in our own feudal Japan, the Emperor was seen as a god, and could do anything he liked. Given how nastily inventive a noble had to be to get to this point, this was not a good thing.
(In The Colour of Magic and Mort the Emperor was an idealistic young boy. However, by Interesting Times he had been supplanted by an elderly man who was quite insane.)
During Interesting Times, Cohen the Barbarian was declared Emperor, and started changing the system into one a no-nonsense barbarian could feel comfortable with. It was felt by many of the peasantry that he was the "preincarnation" of One Sun Mirror (because Agateans believe in a form of backward reincarnation in which the soul's next life takes place chronologically earlier than its previous life). Since the events of The Last Hero, it can be presumed Cohen is no longer Emperor. Details of his replacement are unknown, although it is implied that most of the duties of governance had already been assumed by his Grand Vizier Twoflower by the time of his intended-to-be death.
EcksEcksEcksEcks or Fourecks (previously known as XXXX or Terror Incognita) is clearly influenced by Australian culture, as seen in The Last Continent. Like Australia, Fourecks is both a country and a continent. It consists largely of desert land, which for some time remained unfinished. It was created some time after the rest of the Discworld by the old man who carries the universe in a sack. Lu-Tze and other sources state that on Fourecks time and space are very twisted up, and there is a big time source right in the middle (probably the Red Rock, the Ecksian version of Uluru). The continent's name is a play on Castlemaine XXXX, a Queensland lager that is semi-popular in Britain, and advertised there with adverts playing on Australian stereotypes. According to the books, they put XXXX on the maps because no-one knew what the place was called.
Both the flora and fauna of the continent is extremely dangerous, as Death's Library attests. A book series known as "Dangerous Mammals, Reptiles, Amphibians, Birds, Fish, Jellyfish, Insects, Spiders, Crustaceans, Grasses, Trees, Mosses and Lichens of Terror Incognita" extends at least into "Volume 29c Part Three", while a list of the harmless ones contains only "Some of the sheep." There are few poisonous snakes in XXXX, the explanation for this being that "most of them have been eaten by the spiders".
Due to interference by the wizards of Unseen University while fleeing the bug-obsessed god of evolution during the creation of Fourecks, the entire continent was surrounded, for much of its history, with a huge anticyclone which effectively prevented rainclouds from arriving or ships from leaving. Shortly before the permanent drought reached catastrophic proportions this was dissipated by Rincewind, although, as usual, he received no credit. Many Ecksians have since taken the opportunity to explore the Disc. According to Lu Tze, the relief barman everywhere now comes from Fourecks.
The indigenous population are very similar to Indigenous Australians, with a strong mythology. Until recently, their main peculiarity was a tendency to attack anyone who talked about the weather (see below). There is also a population of Ankh-Morporkian settlers, from various shipwrecks. The capital of Fourecks is evidently Bugarup. The Archchancellor of the local magic college is named Bill Rincewind, possibly a relation of Unseen University's Professor of Cruel and Unusual Geography and trained coward. Other known settlements are Dijabringabeeralong, Cangoolie (a parody of Kalgoorlie) and Worralorrasurfa. Time and space appear more consistent in these areas.
An odd quirk of the Fourecksian government is that they immediately put their politicians in jail as soon as they are elected. According to the locals, "It saves time"[4]
Just off the coast of Fourecks are the islands known as the Land of Fog or the Foggy Islands, home of the morporks (a reference to the English translation of New Zealand's Māori name "Aotearoa", the Land of the Long White Cloud) and Purdeigh's Island (or Purdeighsland), discovered by the explorer Sir Roderick Purdeigh, who somehow missed the continent itself.
Bugarup is the apparent capital or principal city of Fourecks. It has a harbour, with an opera house that looks like an open box of tissues, or as if it is about to set sail (see Sydney Opera House). It also has a prison, in which the Prime Minister resides. Another important feature of the city is the Old Brewery, where Roo Beer lager is made. It has a huge billboard featuring a grinning kangaroo. The New Brewery is abandoned, because it was built on an "unsacred site" which made the beer flat.
There is also a university for wizards, motto: Nullus Anxietas (no worries). The university is similar in some ways to Unseen University in Ankh-Morpork, although rather than an 800-foot-tall (240 m) Tower of Art they have one that is thirty feet tall at the bottom, but a half-mile tall at the top.
Bugarup has a regular festival very similar to the Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras (female impersonators play a notable part). It is called the Galah, possibly after a local bird (and also a play on "gala"). Galah is also Australian slang for someone who is a bit of a fool.