User:Zonination

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Zoni (fully, Zoni Nation) was originally created in spring 2005 by Mark. The nickname stuck, and became permanent for the remainder of that year at Saint Ignatius High School (Cleveland, Ohio)

In November 2005, in room 206, during seventh period Robotics, Tom and Zoni were involved in a theological debate that involved Jesus being able to walk through walls. The discussion quickly fell off track to discuss whether or not Zoni was God. Since he could not completely nullify the arguments Zoni offered, Zonism was born.

[edit] Zonism

Zonism is the belief that Zoni is God. Although this remains a rather small religion, it has about 30 followers to this day.

Image:Almightylogo.gif
A form of the Zonist logo

Since its creation in November 2005, no theology teacher or student has been able to negate any Zonist statements. Zoni has canonized his saints and appointed 6 angels. The angels are as follows:

  • Angel of Allergies
  • Angel of Death
  • Angel of Fire
  • Angel of Mercy
  • Angel of Shortness
  • Angel of Virginity

The Zonists are currently working on a collection of books—written with the authority of divine inspiration—called the Quarzoniahspel. There are currently no books.

Zoni has performed three miracles so far.

  • Making the head of a zip tie disappear.
  • Sending a PVC particle flying across the room, with no force to act upon it.
  • Alphabetizing a keyboard
  • Successfully dividing by zero.