Wikipedia:WikiProject Comics/Peer review/Batgirl

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[edit] Batgirl

The article was passed rather quickly as GA. I would like a review to prepare the article for FA. The Bookkeeper (of the Occult) 09:04, 1 June 2008 (UTC)

  • Comments Looking very good so far. This can be a model for other comic character articles that feature multiple chararacters using the same persona (I was intending to do the same with Flash (comics), but never found enough time or resources). I actually think you can go to FAC pretty soon. Some comments:
  • Helena Bertinelli redirects to Huntress (Helena Bertinelli)
  • Many of the lines in the Bettie Kane section are phrased in a very POV way, ie. "The creation of the Batman Family, which included Batman and Batwoman depicted as parents, Robin and Bat-Girl depicted as their children, the extraterrestrial imp Bat-Mite and the "family pet" Ace the Bat-Hound, lead the Batman related comic books astray". Rephrase to be less POV, or indicate that whatever author cited holds this viewpoint.
  • Some of the paragraphs could be split for better readability. See what I did in the Bettie Kane section.
  • Start the Cassandra Cain section with her introduction, then describe the character. I'd highly recommend combining the Huntress section into this Cassandrea Cain one, as the mystery of who the new Batgirl was didn't last long (and in the long term, it isn't too notable), and was quickly replaced by Cain as part of the overarching "No Man's Land" story. Combine both Cassandra Cain sections.
    • Comment: I kinda disagree here. Combinding these sections disrupts the chronological events that took place. Especially if we were to combine both Cain sections. I'd really rather not unless you believe it would be an absolute requirement in order to pass FAC. The Bookkeeper (of the Occult) 06:35, 7 June 2008 (UTC)
      I added the specific issues in which both characters (Bertinelli/Cain) were revealed as Batgirl, but I can't find a source on the specifics of Cain's introduction. The Bookkeeper (of the Occult) 07:37, 7 June 2008 (UTC)
You can still have it be chronological, but you should divide and combine sections properly by subtopic. For instance, look at the "Musical style" section in Joy Division. The live performance and lyrics subsections are both arranged chronologically as separate sections; the lyrics section ends with a reference to the singer's suicide, but the live performances section starts with him alive. This is fine because each section is dealing with a specific topic and is internally consistent in regards to that topic. It's a bit inconvenient to jump from Cassandra Cain to Misfit and then back to Cassandra Cain, especially since Misfit was only temporarily Batgirl. It's mroe efficient to deal with Cassandra Cain in one section, especially since there's that "main article" link. WesleyDodds (talk) 01:36, 8 June 2008 (UTC)
DONE: The sections are merged and I made an attempt to indicate the chronological order of events in Charlotte Gage-Radcliffe's section. The Bookkeeper (of the Occult) 01:57, 8 June 2008 (UTC)
  • Barbara Gordon and Cassandra Cain might be known by name by a casual fan, but Charlotte Gage-Radcliffe is a bit obscure and too recent for those who don't follow Birds of Prey. Possibly retitle the section "Misfit".
    • Comment: I understand your point but I don't believe it makes that big of a difference. Few people, even regular readers of DC know Bette Kane by name either (neither as Bat-Girl or Flamebird). I also think it would break the layout of the article since all other characters are mentioned by their civilian names. The Bookkeeper (of the Occult) 06:35, 7 June 2008 (UTC)

There's also some prose fixes that should be done, but I'll tackle those once you do further work on the article. Let me know how it goes! WesleyDodds (talk) 04:47, 7 June 2008 (UTC)

Thanks. I'll get to it now. The Bookkeeper (of the Occult) 05:59, 7 June 2008 (UTC)

You really don't need the dates in the character headers. WesleyDodds (talk) 07:34, 8 June 2008 (UTC)

DONE The Bookkeeper (of the Occult) 08:20, 8 June 2008 (UTC)

Comment You might want to check out GoogleScholar. There must have been studies conducted from a feminist point of view (female archetypes of every kind seem to be subject to feminist studies). I also see discussion of Barbara as a librarian (more suited for her article, but maybe make a mention here?). Is there enough material to have an Influences section? Maybe flesh out a few more details on the TV/movie Batgirls too? indopug (talk) 08:48, 8 June 2008 (UTC)

Not really. There is very little if any critical analysis on Barbara Gordon, let alone the batgirl character as a whole. It took me about a year to gather as much information as I did on Barbara and that took going through every search engine known to man- including google. There is mention of Barbara impact on pop culture in her article, but im not sure if it is enough to devote a section in this article. I'll see if I can add it to the other media section. The Bookkeeper (of the Occult) 09:06, 8 June 2008 (UTC)
I've added a cultural impact section similar to Batman's article. As I find more resources, I'll add information to the section. The Bookkeeper (of the Occult) 07:34, 11 June 2008 (UTC)