Wikipedia:WikiProject Biography/Peer review

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

WikiProject Biography
General information (edit · changes)
Departments
Infoboxes
More biography infoboxes...
Biography work groups
Things you can do (edit)
Biography article statistics

This list is generated automatically on alternate nights.
view full worklist

Biography
articles
Importance
Top None Total
Quality
Featured article FA 21 480 501
A 2 19 21
Good article GA 24 966 990
B 151 14396 14547
Start 2 110533 110535
Stub 336778 336778
List 111 111
Assessed 200 463283 463483
Unassessed 56189 56189
Total 200 519472 519672
Shortcut:
WP:BIOPR

The peer review department of the Biography WikiProject conducts peer review of articles on request. The primary objective is to encourage better articles by having contributors who may not have worked on articles to examine them and provide ideas for further improvement.

The peer review process is highly flexible and can deal with articles of any quality. The process is intended to make both marginal and good quality articles into excellent, encyclopedic ones. However, use of a peer review for articles assessed below the Biography WikiProject's B-Class may not be a good use of reviewers' time.

Editors with article requests involving significant policy and/or POV concerns or edit wars should use Wikipedia:Third opinion, Wikipedia:Requests for comment, and/or Noticeboards (Wikipedia:Biographies of living persons/Noticeboard for living persons and Wikipedia:Administrators'_noticeboard/Incidents for others.) before a peer review.

All reviews are conducted by fellow editors—usually members of the Biography WikiProject. Please consider reviewing someone else's article too, if you request yours :-)

Contents

[edit] Instructions

[edit] Requesting a review

  1. Add peer-review=yes to the {{WPBiography}} project banner at the top of the article's talk page (see the project banner instructions for more details on the exact syntax).
  2. From there, click on the "request has been made" link that appears in the template. This will open a page to discuss the review of your article.
  3. Place === [[Name of nominated article]] === at the top.
  4. Below it, write what you hope to gain from a peer review. For example, what are you aiming for with this article? Do you hope it can become a Featured Article? Good Article? Or something else? Remember to sign your post with four tildes (~~~~).
  5. Add {{Wikipedia:WikiProject Biography/Peer review/Name of nominated article}} at the top of the list of requests on this page.
  6. Add a link to your article to the beginning of the Peer Review announcement list.
  7. The peer review volunteers interested in your subject area welcome direct requests. Simply leave a message on their user talk page inviting them to comment on your article.

[edit] Responding to a request

Everyone is encouraged to comment on any request listed here. To comment on an article, please add a new section (using ==== Review by [[User:Your name|Your name]] ====) for your comments, in order to keep multiple responses legible.

[edit] Archiving

Reviews should be archived after they have been inactive for some time, or when the article is nominated as a featured article candidate. To archive a review:

  1. Replace peer-review=yes with old-peer-review=yes in the {{WPBiography}} project banner template at the top of the article's talk page
  2. Move {{Wikipedia:WikiProject Biography/Peer review/Name of nominated article}} from this page to the current archive page.
  3. Remove article from Peer review announcement list


[edit] Requests

[edit] Insane Clown Posse

This article got little notice during the last peer review, and has since failed featured article candidacy, after much work from the Psychopathic Records WikiProject. What further needs to be done in order to get this article up to FA standards, quality and status? (Ibaranoff24 (talk) 18:02, 8 June 2008 (UTC))

Comments from Kakofonous (talk · contribs)

  • Lots of missing commas throughout—here's one example: "After being rejected by several labels, they signed a contract with Jive Records who released the group's third studio album, Riddle Box on October 10, 1995." A comma is needed after Riddle Box as well as before it.
  • I question the reliability of the band's official website as a source. Can other sources use to replace the claims sourced by the site?
  • I notice that you've mixed usage of the serial comma with the traditional version without the comma after the conjunction; stick to one or the other.
  • Some redundancy as well; see this example: "In 1999, Bruce and Utsler performed at Woodstock '99, in addition to completing their fifth studio album, The Amazing Jeckel Brothers." Pretty obvious to us that they are performing at Woodstock '99 in '99! Could be simplified to something like "Bruce and Utsler performed at Woodstock '99 and completed their fifth studio album, The Amazing Jeckel Brothers, in the same year." Check for this type of phrasing throughout.
  • The lead lacks a good overview, aside from a few sentences, of the sections after "History"; expansion would be useful.

Tell me when done or when extra commentary would be useful. --Kakofonous (talk) 00:38, 10 June 2008 (UTC)

[edit] Jane Elizabeth Hodgson

Comments on this article will be appreciated to get rating and maybe GA status. Regards—G716 <T·C> 05:04, 7 June 2008 (UTC)

[edit] Jesse Jackson, Jr.

Article (edit) • Article talk (edit) • Watch peer review

I've listed this article for peer review because it just passed WP:GA, but it is not ready for WP:FAC. TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:LOTM) 05:44, 24 May 2008 (UTC)

Comments from Ealdgyth (talk · contribs)

I don't promise I caught every minor glitch with the format of the refs, but I think I got most of them.
Otherwise the sources look good. You said you wished to go to FA with this, and I've checked over the sources like I would have at FAC. I did not read the prose or do any checking of the prose. 22:05, 24 May 2008 (UTC)
  • A script has been used to generate a semi-automated review of the article for issues relating to grammar and house style. If you would find such a review helpful, please click here. Thanks, APR t 02:55, 26 May 2008 (UTC)

[edit] Charlemagne Tower

I am seeking a peer review of this article because I invested a lot of time in the research and writing of it, and would like to make it as good as possible. Bowie60 (talk) 00:48, 24 May 2008 (UTC)

[edit] Walter O'Malley

Article (edit) • Article talk (edit) • Watch peer review

I've listed this article for peer review because it failed at WP:FAC mostly for lack of having generated commentary. Thus, feedback is needed. I intend to incorporate information from several books that I have checked out from the Chicago Public Library, but the current article may have some problems that are causing people not to want to take an interest. I think maybe there may be some organizational issues that are keeping readers from getting into the article. Advice welcome.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:LOTM) 08:12, 23 May 2008 (UTC)

Thanks, TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:LOTM) 08:12, 23 May 2008 (UTC)

Note: Because of its length, this peer review is not transcluded. It is still open and located at Wikipedia:Peer review/Walter O'Malley/archive1.

[edit] Barry Bonds

Article (edit) • Article talk (edit) • Watch peer review


I've listed this article for peer review because it has failed at WP:GAC for the third time this year. Although many of the most recent reviewer arguments were for reasons not in keeping with policy (e.g., the reviewer knowledgeable on size policy and thought the article exceeded policy limitation), some arguments were of varying degrees of merit. With respect to size, the article is currently only half the length that is against policy at WP:FAC. Currently, according to this tool, the article is 30.2 KB of readable prose and 5350 words and WP:SIZE says articles much more than 6,000 to 10,000 words, which roughly corresponds to 30 to 50 KB of readable prose is a problem. Generally, much longer than 30 of 50 KB is perceived as over 60KB. So this article could be nearly twice as long and be a WP:FA. It certainly is far short of the length of Featured article Harry S. Truman or either of the Roosevelts for example. In truth, given my experience with WP:GAC, which is about as broad and deep as any on WP, I was quite surprised given the lack of merit of some of the arguments against this article that it was not given a hold at GAC. I am somewhat convince that the common dislike of Bonds may have spilled over into the evaluation of the quality of the article. However, I concede that that as the most active editor of the article, I may be too close to see very deep problems with the article. In short, I need more outside eyes on this article that I think of as very close to WP:WIAGA to help me see points of improvement.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:LOTM) 07:40, 19 May 2008 (UTC)

Comment Bonds' article is shorter than his peer group Featured article Wayne Gretzky and Featured article Michael Jordan.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:LOTM) 16:10, 19 May 2008 (UTC)
Further details: Jordan - 37.2 KB, 6493 words. Gretzky - 36.4 KB and 6332 words. Bonds which is deeemed too long 30.2 KB and 5350 words.--TonyTheTiger (t/c/bio/WP:CHICAGO/WP:LOTM) 05:04, 22 May 2008 (UTC)
Note: Because of its length, this peer review is not transcluded. It is still open and located at Wikipedia:Peer review/Barry Bonds/archive1.

[edit] John Zorn

Would like a fresh set of eyes to check this article as I wish to progress it to GA status.

Thanks DISEman (talk) 02:36, 9 May 2008 (UTC)

[edit] James C. Duff

I edited this article to better conform to Wikipedia standards and would like some other editors to take a look at it to make sure I'm not missing anything obvious. Also, I really don't know about the section titles in the article. They don't sound very good to me, but I couldn't think of a better way to divide them at the time. The names and section-break placement are open for discussion.
I'd like to get this article up to GA standards if we can. — OranL (talk) 08:25, 8 May 2008 (UTC)

[edit] Javascript review

The following suggestions were generated with the aid of a semi-automatic javascript program.

You may wish to browse through User:AndyZ/Suggestions for further ideas. Thanks, DrKiernan (talk) 14:38, 13 May 2008 (UTC)

[edit] Skip Holtz

I created this article and wrote it to WP:GA. I need a new set of eyes to help this article achieve WP:FA status. It hopefully will be my first:) PGPirate 22:27, 24 April 2008 (UTC)

  • And I have run the semi-auto peer review. so that is not needed, Thanks, PGPirate 22:30, 24 April 2008 (UTC)

[edit] Yannismarou

  • I think the prose needs some work. The fact that we have to do with two Holtz in the article, that the prose is not flawless sometimes results in the confusing of the reader. I think this is clear in both the second paragraph of the lead, and "Early life".
    • After mentioning Skip Holtz and Lou Holtz, I should be able to say Skip and Lou, instead of their full name, correct?
  • "Skip accepted the offer immediately, and began work. Some time afterward, Skip met his future wife, Jennifer, in Coach Bowden's office.[9] After two years at Florida State, Holtz then took a job as wide receivers coach at Colorado State University under legendary coach Earle Bruce.[4] A year later, Skip joined his father, still the head coach at Notre Dame.[4]" A bit choppy.
    • I agree, ill try to fix it. Not my strong suite.
  • "Head coach Lou Holtz's first choice, Joe Moore, declined. Lou than asked Skip for recommendations to fill the position. Skip... Coach Bowden said Holtz could hire Richt as long as he could hire Skip. Coach Holtz said, "Well, if I'm just going to switch coaches, I might as well hire Skip."[7] Skip became Notre Dame's offensive coordinator in 1992." Again choppy. With this choppiness, going down to the next sections as well, the reader does not get the impression that reads an attractive story.
    • I will fix.
  • "In 1996, Skip's mother, Beth, was diagnosed with throat cancer. Two years later, the cancer spread to her liver, lung, adrenal glands, and ovary. Meanwhile, Skip and Lou". Is this necessary for Skip's bio? Sometimes it is also a matter of how we incorporate such personal infos in a bio. After all you have a "personal life" section, when it should maybe more appropriate to incorporate such info.
    • Maybe it does not need to go that in depth, but I believe his moms cancer should stay in. That is one reason he left UConn, to be closer to his family.
  • "As a moderately successful college coach". According to whom?
    • Me:)
      • I am not sure that "you" are enough!--Yannismarou (talk) 13:28, 1 May 2008 (UTC)
        • Rewritten
  • The 2004-2008 period looks to me quite successful for him. But the relevant section of the article seems to be a bit under-developed.
    • Should I have a year-by-year breakdown?
      • If there is material rich enough to support such a structure.--Yannismarou (talk) 13:28, 1 May 2008 (UTC)
  • "External links" go after "References".--Yannismarou (talk) 13:08, 28 April 2008 (UTC)
    • Done

[edit] JKBrooks85

Even though I'm a college football fan, my main concern is that there isn't enough about his life outside of football. I'm afraid that when you bring it up for FAC, that's going to be the main point of contention. I'm also not a big fan of tables that don't have accompanying prose. If there's anything that can be written about his experience coaching in a bowl game or about his overall coaching record, I'd love to see that in the accompanying section. Barring that, I'd suggest trying to somehow incorporate those tables into the main body of the article, somehow. I've never seen a FA with standalone tables, but that could just be because I haven't been looking for them. Judging from the Jack Kemp FAC and its trials and tribulations, you're going to be in for a long haul getting it through FAC no matter how much prep work you do. Just keep at it, keep making changes, and eventually you'll get this to FA status. Best of luck. JKBrooks85 (talk) 08:33, 6 May 2008 (UTC)

[edit] Dredg

This article has undergone a large amount of reconstruction since it was initially rated a start-class article. I believe that the article could be a B-class article. I would also appreciate any advice that others could give on how the article could be improved, especially from those that may not be familiar with the band. Thank you to everyone who takes the time to review this page. --Ars Sycro (talk) 07:11, 24 April 2008 (UTC)

[edit] Yannismarou

  • Why "dredg" and not "Dredg"? See below.
  • "While attending middle school in Los Gatos, California, Engles and Campanella started playing music together. After Engles and Campanella started attending Los Gatos High School," Repetitive prose. Done.
  • "In 2000, Engles said that the name was "a request"." Can you elaborate on that? Request by whom? Removed.
  • "Currently, very little information has ever been released about these demos." Do this "very little information" include any useful material for the reader? See below.
  • "While the EP shows their nu metal upbringings". "New" or "nu"? Maybe an ignorant's question! See below.
  • "Completed in May 2002, the album was widely available on the internet before being released on October 8, 2002.[15] Two tracks were later made into music videos, "Same Ol' Road" and "Of The Room"." Avoid stubby paragraphs like this one. Merge or expand. Done.
  • "the band expanded the focus to include sleep paralysis" Include it in what way? Done.
  • "Fourth studio album (2008-present)" is undercited compared to previous sections. See below.
  • You have no analysis of their music, and no critical approaches, influence analysis etc. Why don't you take some ideas from FA bands' articles, such as R.E.M., Metallica or Slayer?--Yannismarou (talk) 13:24, 28 April 2008 (UTC)
Thank you for your comments. I will strike them off as I complete them as well as post responses to your questions below.
"dredg" is the form that has been displayed on their CDs (Leitmotif, El Cielo and Catch Without Arms).
With the "request", it is a quote from the cited interview (which may be suspect in nature), and no other explanation was provided for the request. I will remove it in favor of the other quote.
As far as their demos, there is some information available for their second demo; however, there are no "reliable sources" by Wikipedia's standards with this information.
It's "nu metal". Dumb name, but that's the official title.
As far as the fourth studio album, much of this information comes from their Myspace blogs. As these are not considered "reliable sources" and cannot be linked to, it is difficult to cite; however, I think the information is appropriate. If better sources exist (as one did with a single MTV news post), I will certainly use them as reference. --Ars Sycro (talk) 02:38, 29 April 2008 (UTC)

[edit] G. Edward Griffin

It's an article about a controversial person (political and health writer and documentary film producer, president of activist organizations) and dealing with controversial and popular topics, such as the Federal Reserve System, cancer cures, or the discovery of Noah's ark. Since the article's resurrection after a hot AfD discussion and its survival of a second, a handful of friendly editors have steadily improved the article, especially in terms of content, neutrality, quality of sources and balance. Now the article appears to be more or less stable. We'd like to see the quality assessment catch up with those improvements, and would warmly welcome any constructive criticism for further improvement. FeelFreeToBe (talk) 15:41, 23 April 2008 (UTC)

[edit] Yannismarou

  • I do not think that the lead fulfills the criteria of WP:LEAD. It does not look to me as a proper summary of the whole article that could stand as a mini-article.
  • Nothing interesting to include in "Early life" happened between 1956 and 1968?
  • After 1968 I lose a bit the course of his career (already having the 1956-1968 gap!). The article selections and treats three particular issues, but it loses the overall picture. This should be a comprehensive biography; not just the treatment of just some interesting issues in a person's biography.
  • "External links" go after "References". Done, thanks!
  • Are there any additional personal info? E.g., is he married?

The article is well-referenced and well-written, but it needs further development and probably restructuring.--Yannismarou (talk) 15:00, 1 May 2008 (UTC)

Thank you very much for your comments! I'm especially grateful for your 1st and 3rd point, because these points are easy to miss when you're working on an article yourself. We'll work on them and I hope we'll be able to achieve improvements. As for points 2 and 5, it's difficult to find reliable information about Mr Griffin, and no detailed biography exists about him so far. Probably we could include further information, such as a sentence about his children, but we're trying our best to stick to WP:NPF and only include information related to his notability. The fact that he's mainly notable for a number of publications (when we look at only what we can source well) caused the structuring of the article into issues. With his relatively low degree of popularity, a comprehensive biography would probably be a bit of a stretch, therefore we're rather concentrating on those things that he's notable for. Any suggestions how the article could be restructured to meet both goals (not losing overall picture + avoiding not significant information)? Thanks again! FeelFreeToBe (talk) 23:50, 5 May 2008 (UTC)

[edit] Tenacious D

Old peer review

I hope to get this article up to FA class standard. I would like help to address all prose issues here, as I think that is all that is left to be done. Tenacious D Fan (talk) 11:27, 19 April 2008 (UTC)

[edit] Yannismarou

  • It is not necessary to over-link the link, if the same things can or are linked in the main article.
  • The lead prose looks to me fine. Maybe this part is just a bit choppy: "Many of their songs discuss the duo's purported musical and sexual prowess, as well as their friendship and intake of cannabis. Their debut self-titled album features absurd and humorous sketches.[4] Music critics have compared the storyteller-style lyrics of their songs to lyrics of rock opera."
  • "Both were members of the Los Angeles-based theatre troupe, The Actors' Gang[7][8] which was performing Tim Robbins and Adam Simon's[9] play Carnage.[10]" I think I have pointed out from the previous pr already, that sometimes you over-cite within the same sentence, and this may interrupt the reader's attention and focus on the text itself. Have in mind that you can combine notes. For such methods, check Sandy's Tourette syndrome or some of Cla68's FAs or of my nominations El Greco or even an article I now work on, Roman-Persian Wars.
  • Per MoS wikilink only date-month-year, and not month-year as you do in some cases. E.g. "In May 2000" and not "In May 2000".
  • I like the fact that you include critical assessments of the band's work, as you do in "First album (2001–2003)". Try to have more!
  • "A music video, directed by Liam Lynch, was shot for the song.[32] It and featuring Dave Grohl along with cameos by Jason Reed, Ben Stiller and Lynch himself." I did not understand what you exactly mean here.
  • "The film opened to poor box office results and as of December 17, 2006, had earned US$8,334,575 domestically". Any comments or reactions of the band's members for this bad opening and the low earnings?
  • "The front cover of Tenacious D features Black and Gass standing naked below the Devil.[67] Black described it as he and Gass being "schooled by Satan".[68] The pose is similar to that shown on the Devil tarot card. The Devil card signifies sexual desire, uncontrolled energy, vice and addiction.." A bit choppy.
  • "Later, Tenacious D made an appearance in the first episode of Tom Goes to the Mayor televised on Adult Swim.[84] In the run up to the release of The Pick of Destiny film, Tenacious D made several appearances performing the "Pick of Destiny" song, including at the 2006 American Music Awards on 11 November, 2006 and on Late Night with Conan O'Brien. On 2 December, 2006, Tenacious D was the musical guest on Saturday Night Live for the first time.[85] They opened the 2006 Spike TV Video Game Awards, with a performance of "The Metal".[86] They also made an appearance on the 2006 MTV Video Music Awards.[87]" A bit repetitive.
I removed the repetition. Metao (talk) 12:22, 29 April 2008 (UTC)
The repetition has been removed. Metao (talk) 12:22, 29 April 2008 (UTC)
Removed, the repetition was. Metao (talk) 12:22, 29 April 2008 (UTC)
In Soviet Russia, repetition removes you. Metao (talk) 12:22, 29 April 2008 (UTC)
  • "Gass performs lead acoustic guitar and vocals for the band Trainwreck, under the pseudonym "Klip Calhoun".[43] The band also features Jason "JR" Reed, under the pseudonym "Darryl Donald". Black occasionally appears using the name "Tuffy McFuckelby".[89] John Konesky and John Spiker, lead guitar and bass, respectively, on The Pick of Destiny album, are also in the band. They are currently working on recording an album with producer John King.[104] Songs expected on the album include "Trainwreck Theme Song", "Baby, Let's Rock" and "Rock Responsibly"." Choppy prose!
I smoothed this sentence out a little, dropping a little irrelevance along the way. Metao (talk) 11:58, 29 April 2008 (UTC)

In terms of content, the article is fine. Some more critical approaches and not just what the band's members say of themselves would be fine. The overciting, as I mentioned above, gets a bit tiring sometimes, and the prose is obviously improved with still some flaws (in FAC you may face Tony's harsh criticism!). However, I think it deserves the star!--Yannismarou (talk) 12:05, 28 April 2008 (UTC)

[edit] Jordanus de Nemore

This is an article replacing an older (Jordanus Nemorarius) article based on an early-twentieth-century encyclopedia article. For the last 100 years a great deal has been learned about the work of Jordanus, as now summarized in the article, and all biographical rumours about him have been refuted. We simply know nothing certain about this man, only that his works start appearing in the first half of the 13th century.

It is not a stub. I have worked on Jordanus all my life, and no one is going to get anything more of substance. All that is left to do is to critically edit one of his texts, although that will be unlikely to change the content summary in the article.

If the reviewer(s) think that more informtion of a certain type is desired, I would be happy to either add it, or show why such information is never going to be available (e.g., birth, death, education, nationality information).

It should probably be a GA article, but I could try to turn it into an A with some comments.

Ron B. Thomson (talk) 19:09, 16 April 2008 (UTC)

The following suggestions were generated with the help of a semi-automatic javascript program.

  • You need to write a lead section, to conform with guidelines at Wikipedia:Lead. The lead (the bit before the first sub-heading) should have an appropriate number of paragraphs, and should adequately summarize the article. [?]
  • Consider adding more links to the article; per Wikipedia:Manual of Style (links) and Wikipedia:Build the web, create links to relevant articles. [?]
    • a number of (reasonable) links have been added. Ron B. Thomson (talk) 19:09, 21 May 2008 (UTC)
  • Only one image! Please try to find and include a free use image in the top right corner of the article.[?]
    • Since we have no biographical information, there are no "contemporary" images so this will be hard to do. (talk) 20:30, 13 May 2008 (UTC)
    • Most of the other diagrams of any interest are under copyright. Ron B. Thomson (talk) 19:09, 21 May 2008 (UTC)
  • You may wish to consider adding an appropriate infobox for this article, if one exists relating to the topic of the article. [?]
  • Per Wikipedia:Manual of Style (headings), headings generally do not start with articles ('the', 'a(n)'). For example, the section called ==The Algorismi treatises==, should be changed to ==Algorismi treatises==. [?]
    • Changed (talk) 20:30, 13 May 2008 (UTC)
  • As per Wikipedia:Manual of Style (headings), please do not link words in headings.[?] They do not format properly in some browsers and some screenreaders used by disabled users cannot parse them (see Wikipedia:Accessibility).~
  • Watch for redundancies that make the article too wordy instead of being crisp and concise. (You may wish to try Tony1's redundancy exercises.)
    • Vague terms of size often are unnecessary and redundant - “some”, “a variety/number/majority of”, “several”, “a few”, “many”, “any”, and “all”. For example, “All pigs are pink, so we thought of a number of ways to turn them green.”
    • I will do some pencil and paper editing of the whole text again to try to tighten this up. Ron B. Thomson (talk) 20:30, 13 May 2008 (UTC)
    • Don't see anything specific that can be fixed. Ron B. Thomson (talk) 19:09, 21 May 2008 (UTC)

Thanks, DrKiernan (talk) 14:28, 13 May 2008 (UTC)

[edit] Johan Arnold Smellekamp

New article on a South African statesman of of Dutch descent of the mid-19th century. This article is part of a series of Orange Free State biographies. Looking for Start-status, if possible on the basis of quality B-status. Michel Doortmont (talk) 18:32, 11 April 2008 (UTC)

  • Minor comments You might consider expanding the lead per WP:LEAD, adding one or two free-use images if possible, and there are three years (1863, 1866 and 1859) which are linked when they probably don't need to be (don't have accompanying dates and are just years on their own). In the "Family" section, I would move that external link into a footnote. DrKiernan (talk) 14:45, 13 May 2008 (UTC)

[edit] Eros Ramazzotti

This is an article about a well known Italian singer, it initially was a small article when I first began working on it, I expanded it as much as I could by whatever knowledge I had about the artist and then I did thorough research in order to include information about his early life and details about his 20 years of career. I have included sources for the article, unfortunately, not every single one could be found in English language, some of them are in German. At the moment the article has a Start rating, I'm hoping to get at least a "B" and perhaps it may even qualify for GA rating.--Harout72 (talk) 02:59, 11 April 2008 (UTC)

[edit] Javascript review

The following suggestions were generated with the aid of a semi-automatic javascript program.

  • Please expand the lead to conform with guidelines at Wikipedia:Lead. The lead should have an appropriate number of paragraphs, and should adequately summarize the article.[?]
  • Per Wikipedia:Context and Wikipedia:Manual of Style (dates), months and days of the week generally should not be linked. Years, decades, and centuries can be linked if they provide context for the article.[?]
  • This article has only one image. Please see if there are any further free use images that fall under the Wikipedia:Image use policy and fit under one of the Wikipedia:Image copyright tags that can be uploaded. To upload images on Wikipedia, go to Special:Upload; to upload non-fair use images on the Wikimedia Commons, go to commons:special:upload.[?]
  • Please consider adding {{persondata|PLEASE SEE [[WP:PDATA]]!}} along with the required parameters to the article - see Wikipedia:Persondata for more information.[?]
  • Watch for redundancies that make the article too wordy instead of being crisp and concise. (You may wish to try Tony1's redundancy exercises.)
    • Vague terms of size often are unnecessary and redundant - “some”, “a variety/number/majority of”, “several”, “a few”, “many”, “any”, and “all”. For example, “All pigs are pink, so we thought of a number of ways to turn them green.”
  • The article needs a thorough copyediting for English usage. See User:Tony1/How to satisfy Criterion 1a for some pointers, or ask for help from a native English speaker who you think may be familiar with the article's subject matter.[?]

You may wish to browse through User:AndyZ/Suggestions for further ideas. Thanks, DrKiernan (talk) 14:54, 13 May 2008 (UTC)

[edit] Archives

Articles archived - 2006, 2007, 2008

See also: Index of WikiProject Biography peer reviews and Category:Old requests for Biography peer review