Top Gear (series 6)

Main review: Clarkson tests the Mercedes CLS55 AMG, a stylish and comfortable four-door coupe with a throaty 500-hp supercharged V8, brakes from the SLR supercar, a luxurious and wonderful interior, and "fabulous handling." The Stig does a lap time of 1:26.9, currently the fastest four-door saloon ever tested. Jeremy adores it as a "thug in a silk dressing gown" and says the only thing that would keep him from buying on is fear of the recent reputation for dodgy Mercedes build quality.

News: The collapse of MG Rover.

Review: May tests the Honda Element, which is not for sale in the UK. He brings it to a community of retirees to see what they make of it; he proclaims it cool after the stereotypical old Honda drivers don't like it.

Challenge: Clarkson attempted to see whether a Challenger 2 tank could lock its main cannon onto a Range Rover Sport. The Range Rover was good on the rough stuff, but the tank was better.

Cool Wall: Clarkson is annoyed that Kristin-Scott Thomas likes the Honda Civic and a red Bentley and thinks the DB9 is uncool, so he replaces her with Fiona Bruce as the expectation. Jeremy and Richard fall in love with the Alfa Romeo Brera.

Challenge: Hammond and May played a football match using the new Toyota Aygo being driven by drivers such as Russ Swift and Paul Smith. Richard won 2-1.

Star in a Reasonably Priced Car: James Nesbitt discusses guns with Jeremy and what its like being 40. Lap time of 1:51.3

Main review: After destroying the disappointing Maserati Biturbo and lauding the Maserati 250F for its performance in the hands of Juan Manuel Fangio in the 1957 German Grand Prix, Clarkson announces the £412,000 Maserati MC12, saying it's "An Enzo in Drag". Fastest car of 1:18.9. He is impressed with its speed, but, like the Biturbo, doesn't consider it to be a proper Maserati.

Challenge: The team was asked to buy a 2-door coupé that wasn't a Porsche for under £1,500, mirroring a competition they had in series five where they each had to spend £1,500 to buy a Porsche. May bought a Jaguar XJS, Hammond a BMW 635CSi, while Clarkson went for a turbocharged Mitsubishi Starion. They were then set a series of challenges to see who had got the best deal, scoring points for each challenge. The challenges included trying to get to 140 mph (225 km/h), having to drive at 30 mph (48 km/h) over Belgian cobbles with a bucket of water on their lap. They then had to drive to Oxford, with Jeremy arriving first, then Richard using sat-nav, but James never made it because his Jag broke down five times en route. Finally, the team were allowed to spend the remainder of their £1,500 on upgrading their cars prior to an endurance race in a farm's field. The overall winner turned out to be May, followed by Hammond, but with Clarkson out of the running. May, however, offered to give the title to Clarkson if he admitted "I'm a clot and I ruined my car", because he had installed a highly uprated turbocharger (said to be from Pentti Airikkala's Group A Rally car), without any change to the cooling system. The result was that during the endurance race, the engine coolant boiled repeatedly, destroying power and putting Clarkson out of the running.

Star in a Reasonably Priced Car: Jack Dee, who has apparently been in a bad mood since he was 14. Lap time of 1:53.5

Review: Aston Martin DB9 Volante. Richard finds it to be too wobbly and shiny, and proves that more people would like a puppy than this car.

News: Clarkson's Ford GT finally arrives and is shown in the studio alongside Hammond's dream car, a half-timbered Morgan. They talk about the sacrifices needed to make in order to enjoy owning "the car of your dreams".

Review: May drives the Maserati Bora, which is his favorite Italian 70s supercar, and his overall favorite except for the old Aston Martin V8 Vantage. The Bora had comfort and sophistication, but luxurious touches made it the slowest supercar of the 70s. May is vindicated as it is civilized and is still decent to drive in the modern era.

Main Review: Clarkson reviews the Wiesmann MF3 and the TVR Tuscan. The Tuscan is proven to be a very hard and complicated car to enter and drive. Lap times of 1:27 (Wiesmann) and 1:25.7 (TVR). But James (who hates TVRs) and Jeremy prefer the Wiesmann.

Stunt: Clarkson attends the opening of the Chipping Norton lido, near his home, driving a Rolls-Royce into it, apparently as a surprise. (The stunt was of course fully planned, and Clarkson is a well-known supporter of the pool's fund-raising events.^[1])

Feature: They also present the new Batmobile from Batman Begins in the studio.

Star in a Reasonably Priced Car: Christopher Eccleston, for whom they must find an automatic Liana (as he is only qualified to drive an automatic gearbox), 1:52.4.

News: Clarkson's Ford GT and all the problems it has caused him during the week, starting from the engine not working when he wanted to set off home in it, continuing with the alarm starting off with no reason and the tracker device sending SOS calls while Clarkson was in the car. Clarkson concludes by threatening the people at Ford if they don't mend his car, after mocking the Focus diesel courtesy car they gave him.

Main review: The guys hand over duties to their mothers to review a range of new small cars including the Renault Modus, Honda Jazz and Peugeot 1007. They're tested by seeing how much space there is, how fast they are (to which Hammond points out May's mother is much faster than May himself is) and how easy they are to get into. Their mothers' decision is that the practical and easy-to-drive Honda is the best, while the presenters favour the quicker and better-priced Renault. Everyone finds the slow and impractical Peugeot to be rubbish.

Review: Clarkson tests the Cadillac CTS-V and mocks the claim that it handled like a European car (after development had been done at the Nürburgring), before racing it against an Audi S4 driven by the Stig. Despite a similar power output, and the Stig in competent control of the Audi, the Cadillac wins. Jeremy likes it, but doesn't recommend it over the Monaro muscle car.

Review: Hammond tests the new BMW 3 Series and describes it as "a great piece of machinery"; he also talks about the 3-Series outselling the Ford Mondeo, thus diminishing the "snob value" of the badge.

Challenge: Can a 3-ton stretched limo jump over a wedding party? The party was consisted of an outdoor wedding setting, a few caravans and the guests' cars. The obese Lincoln limo clears the wedding setting, but smashes into the caravans and one of the cars.

Star in a Reasonably Priced Car: Omid Djalili, Britain's only Iranian comedian, talks about the only car made in Iran and Clarkson suggests that Iranian nukes can't be very advanced if this is their idea of car technology. Lap of 1:51.1.

Main review: Clarkson returns to the 60's to define cool with the Aston Martin DB5 and a Jaguar E-type. In standard, antique form they are terrible to drive, unreliable, extremely expensive, and slower in a drag race than a 2.4 litre Honda Accord. But he also recommends that nearly all of these problems can be overcome by spending somewhat more money on a modernized and updated version. The Stig takes both of them around the track; the DB5 is slower than a Range Rover and the Suzuki Liana at 1:46, while the modernized E-type sets the same time as a V6-engined Audi TT at 1:32.

Review: James May takes a Nissan Murano to Hertfordshire and after an overall favourable review he concurs with Clarkson that the only thing he does not like about the car is the looks. Especially the front grille reminds Clarkson of the James Bond villain Jaws. Its positive points include comfort, ease of driving, and most of all extreme quietness.

News: The new Mitsubishi Evo IX is the same car as its predecessor, Mitsubishi Evo VIII. Lamborghini introduces a spyder version of the Gallardo, James May promotes a retro-styled hand-free phone and the bold new Citroen C6 is in the studio.

Challenge: Snipers of the Irish Guards try to shoot Clarkson, as he drives the new Mercedes SLK55 AMG and Porsche Boxster S around a deserted village. Unfortunately, they weren't using real bullets.

Greatest Driving Song of All Time: For the remainder of the series, May will be presenting five songs the viewers nominated to find out what song is the "Greatest Driving Song of All Time." This week, it is Golden Earring's "Radar Love".

Star in a Reasonably-Priced Car: 1996 F1 World Champion Damon Hill tries to disprove the claims that he is the Stig, then talks to Clarkson about the 2005 United States Grand Prix 6-car fiasco; they discuss the bad tastes in cars of people that "have lived at 300 mph" (Hill's car at the moment was an Audi A3). Hill's time of 1:46.3 starts the F1 drivers' board.

Review: Aston Martin's DBR9 racer is given a race around the track. It sets a very quick time of 1:08.6, but can't go on the board because it is not a production vehicle.

Challenge: A race from Heathrow Airport to Oslo. Clarkson chose the Mercedes-Benz SLR McLaren because it was both extremely fast and completely comfortable. This choice seemed to vindicate the SLR as the better real-world car over the Porsche Carrera GT. He embarked on a tiring 1300-mile drive via the Channel Tunnel, France, Belgium, Holland, Germany, Denmark, the Oresund Bridge, Sweden, and into Norway. Hammond and May took a flight to Newcastle, and then a ferry to Kristiansand. Initially, it looked hopeful for them as they planned to complete the trip by speedboat; however, in heavy seas, they broke down in two speedboats and had to complete the journey by bus. Though Clarkson had spent a few hours napping in Denmark, he beat them by several hours due to the setbacks.

News: Nissan Micra C+C, the car for the man who "likes musicals". Also, Hummer have produced aftershave and cologne for "inbreds."

Star in a Reasonably Priced Car: Jeremy discusses A Picture of Britain and Question Time with David Dimbleby. Lap time of 1:52

Greatest Driving Song of All Time: Steppenwolf's "Born to Be Wild"

Main review: Jeremy drives the first and only non-terrifying TVR, the Sagaris. James contends that despite his great praise for the vehicle, Jeremy would rather have a Mercedes SLK55 because he's a coward.

News: Jeremy has slipped two discs, which he describes as 'repetitive oversteer injury'; Proton have announced the Savvy, as a 'My First Lotus'; two new Mustangs, neither of which will be coming to the UK; Mercedes have styled a car like a fish; the Top Gear Survey.

Versus Challenge: Clarkson races a Fiat Panda against a marathon runner around the London Marathon circuit during the morning rush-hour. After early success, the car gets bogged down in traffic and never recovers.

Greatest Driving Song of All Time: Deep Purple's "Highway Star"

Star in a Reasonably Priced Car: Justin Hawkins recalls driving across America in a Reliant Regal. Lap time of 1:48.

Cool Wall: The DB9 Cabriolet is cool in case you own one and it's called over a tannoy; Richard takes advantage of Clarkson's injury to place the Maserati Gran Sport in cool and the Peugeot 107 in uncool; the Panda is cool because it's a 4x4 and annoys ecomentalists; the Ranger Rover Sport is uncool because a reality TV star wants one; the two disagree over the SLK55 — Hammond says its too fiddly and the two use large audience members to fight by proxy — Hammond's wins at first, but then Clarkson intervenes and it goes in sub-zero.

Time Challenge: To celebrate the Transit's 40^th birthday, Hammond goes to the Nürburgring to see if Sabine Schmitz can fulfill her word and do a lap of the infamous track in a Transit van in less than Jeremy's best lap in the diesel S-Type of 10 minutes. She fails on the first try, so tries again after streamlining and putting the van on a drastic and radical weight diet, and achieves a 10:08 the second time, coming just 9 seconds short of the time Jeremy had set the previous year. Back at the hangar, Sabine is invited to take over oversteering duties from Hammond for the next series, being 'cheaper', much better looking, a better (quicker) driver, and most importantly taller, as well as speaking better English.

Main review: Ferrari F430. Jeremy claims it "about the best car I've ever driven". The convertible version of the F430 is just as pin-sharp to drive and comes only one-tenth of a second slower on the track. He can find nothing wrong with either version, but advises that unattractive people should avoid the soft top, so as not to create embarrassment.

Challenge: Clarkson' Hammond and May take some convertible versions of existing coupes to Iceland. Specifically the Chrysler Crossfire, Nissan 350Z and Audi TT. Clarkson likes the Chrysler because as a soft top it's attractive, comfortable, and cheap. Hammon likes the Nissan for its power. May likes the Audi because of its build quality and four-wheel drive. Two of them find the TT to be too dull, two of them find the Crossfire to be rubbish, and two of them find the Nissan to be too camp and idiotic. They cannot decide which is best, because each one is flawed.

News: The boys discuss NISMO (with May expressing his hate for the R34 Skyline GT-R). A heavily modified Citroën C2 is also discussed and shown in the studio.

Star in a reasonably priced car: Tim Rice has a Jaguar, but he and nobody who works for him know which one. Lap of 1:52.7.

Greatest Driving Song of All Time: Meat Loaf's "Bat out of Hell". In addition, this song has been ridiculed by the presenters.

Main review: The new E60 BMW M5, priced identically with the Mercedes CLS. Jeremy admits disappointment, and points out the list of failures in great detail: confusing electronic settings for everything, annoying sat-nav, jerky gearbox, uncomfortable ride, ugly exterior, non-canceling indicator, and disappointing appreciation of speed with the 400 horsepower standard setting. Though the review then appears to be over, Jeremy presses the M button and the engine delivers 507 horsepower, the suspension stiffens, and the gearbox goes to a default race setting. In this form, it is spectacular to drive, but very fragile- it had to be mended before a lap could be done. In the hands of the Stig, it does a lap time of 1:26.2, putting it slightly faster than the CLS, but worse as an all-rounder.

Review: Clarkson drives three hot hatchbacks, the VW Golf GTI, RenaultSport Mégane, and the Vauxhall Astra VXR. Clarkson thinks the Astra is too powerful for a front-wheel drive car, resulting in disastrous understeer. Torque-steer always yanks the front wheels to the left, and the extra power is useless as it is slower than the Renault. Clarkson likes the Mégane, but would still buy a Golf instead, reiterating his decision in Series 5, Episode 6.

Challenge: Hammond and May play a game called "Road Test Russian Roulette", which involved them having to test cars while driving the cars' owners (which are supposed to be drunk) back to their homes. Hammond tries to be polite and avoid telling people that some parts of the car are rubbish, instead talking about spices and that part of the car. Clarkson tells him that he's cocked it up because of this approach.

Challenge: A new world record was set for the number of complete sideways rolls in a car. A stuntman managed to make a Ford Sierra estate complete 6 rolls - and survived.

Star in a reasonably priced car: Chris Evans who tells Jeremy about trying (and failing) to take old people to the shops during his five-year hiatus, Lap of 1:47.9

Greatest Driving Song of All Time: Queen's "Don't Stop Me Now"

Main review: Clarkson tests the BMW 535d, testing the diesel car against the similarly-priced petrol version. The diesel is quieter at motorway speed, it has much more torque, it's slightly cheaper, and the weight of the heavier engine doesn't affect the handling. The Stig takes it to a 1:31.8 time. But the petrol version is more responsive, more fun to drive, and it beats the diesel on a track.

Challenge: Hammond goes back to Iceland (on the basis that the convertible test in episode 8 had been very boring, and he was not allowed to come home until he had filmed something interesting) to race a modified off-road vehicle against a Snowmobile over Lake Kleifarvatn.

Greatest Driving Song of All Time: A retrospect of the five finalists.

Star in a reasonably priced car: Big Brother host Davina McCall tries to invite Clarkson onto Big Brother and admits she owns an eco-unfriendly Range Rover, she also tells about her shoes and how the Stig said they were slowing her down and made her do a lap barefoot. She gets a 1:57.1, slower than the completely lost Jonathan Ross in wet conditions.

Review: May takes the Bentley Continental Flying Spur to Dubai, as he can think of no other place to respectfully test the "New Money" car. May defies his "Captain Slow" nickname by bringing the Bentley to 180 mph on roads specially closed off for him; he likes the car and finds that the addition of two more doors and a bit of re-characterization has moved it successfully away from the Bentley Continental GT. Jeremy despises the new four-door Bentley, calling it "the most dreary styling" he's ever seen.

Star in a reasonably priced car, take two: Mark Webber complains that the wet conditions would hurt him, despite Clarkson's reassurances that he could've gotten 4 seconds faster in dry. His time of 1:47.1 is disputed after Clarkson suggests that he could have gotten a 1:43 in dry conditions. Afterwards, Clarkson gives Webber a shirt proclaiming "I AM THE STIG."

Review: The Trio reviews several off-road toys, including a quad Bike, the 8-wheeled Argo Cat, a Hovercraft, and others in a bid to find out, which one of them is most fun?

Main review: Hammond tested the Vauxhall Monaro VX-R and was taught how to drift in the same car by D1 Grand Prix driver Yasuyuki Kazama, despite Kazama not speaking English (he had to teach using hand signals). Kazama then took the VX-R and showed Hammond how to drift properly.

News: It is revealed that Vauxhall has discontinued the distribution of the Monaro VX-R, making the former segment irrelevant.

Challenge: James May tries to re-create the Top Gear theme tune using car engine noises. Ranging from the supercar Ferrari Enzo to a classic Chevrolet Corvette to modern cars like the Suzuki Swift and the Mazda RX-8 and even a construction dumper, May's song is purist as he refuses to use computer effects to make it sound better, with results that fail to impress the others. Clarkson compares it to "a fat shop assistant farting."

Star in a Reasonably Priced Car: Timothy Spall talks about his movie roles with Tom Cruise, and manages to take the Liana to a respectable 1:51.1 time.

Greatest Driving Song of All Time:

• Rankings:
  1. (WINNER) Queen - "Don't Stop Me Now"
  2. Golden Earring - "Radar Love"
  3. Meat Loaf - "Bat out of Hell"
  4. Steppenwolf - "Born to Be Wild"
  5. Deep Purple - "Highway Star"

Review: Clarkson reviews the Ford Lightning, and considers the truck useless in England. From claiming it's made from old shovels and the interior is rubbish to getting something stolen from the bed of the truck, Clarkson closes his argument by mentioning how these trucks often appear to crash in police chase videos.

Cool Wall: Clarkson and Hammond could not be bothered to put up the BMW 3-Series on the cool wall, finding it too dull to be worth the time.

Review: Hammond participated in the Pamplona Bull Run in Spain, where he was shoved into the path of a bull by a participant, before a segment in which he road tested the Lamborghini Murcielago Roadster.