The Fire (Seinfeld episode)

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“The Fire”
Seinfeld episode
Episode no. Season 5
Episode 84
Written by Larry Charles
Directed by Tom Cherones
Guest stars Melanie Chartoff, Veanne Cox, Jon Favreau & Dom Irrera
Original airdate May 5, 1994
Season 5 episodes
Seinfeld - Season 5
September 1993 - May 1994
  1. "The Mango"
  2. "The Puffy Shirt"
  3. "The Glasses"
  4. "The Sniffing Accountant"
  5. "The Bris"
  6. "The Lip Reader"
  7. "The Non-Fat Yogurt"
  8. "The Barber"
  9. "The Masseuse"
  10. "The Cigar Store Indian"
  11. "The Conversion"
  12. "The Stall"
  13. "The Dinner Party"
  14. "The Marine Biologist"
  15. "The Pie"
  16. "The Stand In"
  17. "The Wife"
  18. "The Raincoats, Part 1"
  19. "The Raincoats, Part 2"
  20. "The Fire"
  21. "The Hamptons"
  22. "The Opposite"
List of Seinfeld episodes

"The Fire" was the eighty-fourth episode of the NBC sitcom Seinfeld and the 20th episode for the 5th season. It aired on May 5, 1994.

[edit] Plot

At Pendant Publishing Kramer is discussing his idea of a coffee table book about coffee tables with Elaine and his new girlfriend, Elaine's co-worker, Toby. Elaine finds Toby, as well as Kramer's book, very annoying. George is dating Robin(played by Melanie Chartoff, whom Larry David knew from the time they worked on the short-lived sketch series Fridays) a woman with a young son. Jerry is preparing his act to impress a critic.

Kramer invites Toby to see Jerry's act, and she heckles, boos, and hisses him ceaselessly. As a result, Jerry gets a bad review from the critic. George, attending Robin's son's birthday party, cannot understand how Eric the Clown (played by Jon Favreau) doesn't know who Bozo is. Later George panics when a small fire breaks out and he rushes away, pushing down children, senior citizens, and the clown in the process. He tries to justify his behavior by saying how he acted bravely, like a "leader."

Jerry takes the ultimate revenge for a comedian by appearing at Toby's workplace to heckle her; she runs out of her office and onto the street and loses her pinky toe. Later, Kramer retells the story of how he found the toe, boarded a bus, and fought a gunman just to go to the hospital.

Toby got her toe reattached and was promoted instead of Elaine because her boss felt sorry for her because of the accident. At the club, Jerry convinced the critic to return to judge his performance again. Also in the club, George, inspired by Kramer's story, asks Robin for a second chance. However, he panics again at the sight of a comedian's prop gun and ruins Jerry's act.

[edit] Quotes

  • George: I was trying to lead the way. We needed a leader, if I die then all hope is lost. Who would lead, the clown?

Woman, mother: When you ran you knocked everyone down in a mad panic. Then you left everyone behind.

George: Seemingly, seemingly, to the untrained eye. I can fully understand how you got that impression. In a fire, you stay close to the ground, am I right?

Fireman: How do you live with yourself??!

George: It's not easy.

  • Jerry: Well, perhaps when she's released from the burn center she'll see things differently.




Scene: After Jerry heckles Toby, Kramer tells him and George the aftermath.

  • Kramer: Well, after he heckled Toby, she got so upset that she ran out of the building and a street sweeper ran over her foot and severed her pinky toe.

George: That's unbelievable!
Kramer: Yeah, and after the ambulance left, I found the toe. So I put it in a Cracker Jack box, filled it with ice, and took off for the hospital.
George: You ran?
Kramer: No, I jumped on the bus. I told the driver, "I got a toe here, buddy, step on it!"
George: Holy cow!
Kramer: Yeah, yeah. Then, all of a sudden, this guy pulls out a gun. Well, I knew any delay is gonna cost her her pinky toe, so I got out of the seat, and I started walking towards him. He says, "Where do you think you're going, Cracker Jack?" I say, "Well, I got a little prize for ya, buddy." (Makes punching moves.) Plow! Plat! Ke-yah! Knocked him out cold.
George: How could you do that!?
Kramer: Then everybody is screaming, because the driver, he's passed out because of all the commotion. The bus is out of control! So I grab him by the collar, I take him out of the seat, I get behind the wheel. Now I'm driving the bus.
George: You're Batman.
Kramer: Yeah, yeah, I am Batman. Then the mugger, he comes to, and he starts choking me. So I'm fighting him off with one hand, and I kept driving the bus with the other. Then I managed to open up the door, and I kicked him out the door, you know, with my foot, you know, at the next stop.
Jerry: You kept making all the stops!?
Kramer: Well, people kept ringing the bell!

George: You did all this for a pinky toe?
Kramer: Well, it's a valuable appendage.

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