The Chrismukkah That Almost Wasn't

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“The Chrismukkah That Almost Wasn't”
The O.C. episode
Episode no. Season 2
(2004-2005)
Episode 6
Written by Josh Schwartz
Directed by Tony Wharmby
Production no. 2T5106
Original airdate December 16, 2004 (FOX)
Episode chronology
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"The Chrismukkah That Almost Wasn't" is the 33rd episode of the FOX television series, The O.C. The episode was written by Josh Schwartz and was directed by Tony Wharmby. It originally aired on Thursday December 16, 2004.

Contents

[edit] Guest starring

[edit] Plot

Caleb's trial is approaching, and Caleb is starting to realize that he might be going to prison. Sandy urges him to tell the truth about Renee and Lindsay. He says it will be easier to face Kirsten and Julie, than it would be to go to prison. Caleb isn't so sure, and is reluctant to own up about his affair with Renee. With that, Sandy walks away from the situation, saying he is finished.

Back home, Seth is ecstatic about his favorite holiday, Chrismukkah. After hearing that the Cooper-Nichols will be attending their annual dinner, Seth is concerned that the Gentile to Jew ratio is too high, so he is on a mission to find Jews to invite to dinner. On the topic of invitees, Seth reveals that Alex is away for the holidays. Ryan wants to invite Lindsay but is hesitant about rushing things. In class though, when Lindsay mentions she has never had a good Christmas, Ryan invites her over.

On Jimmy's boat at the harbour, Julie and Jimmy are in bed together. Julie feels that they might be rushing things, and she doesn't want to commit adultery. But she rationalizes their romance as Caleb might be going to jail, so they have sex. Up the shore, Sandy meets Renee to discuss the case against her and Caleb. He urges her to talk about the affair she had with Caleb, or she could end up in prison for accepting bribes from Caleb (which were actually support payments for Lindsay). She is just as hesitant as Caleb, afraid to tell Lindsay the truth.

Back at school, Marissa and Summer talk about how sucky this Christmas will be. Zach and D.J. are both away with their families, and so they are both faced with spending the holidays with their respective dysfunctional families. When Seth sees how miserable they both are, he invites them by his house for Chrismukkah.

That night before dinner, Seth tells Ryan that Summer and Marissa are coming for Chrismukkah. Ryan isn't happy because he doesn't want Marissa and Lindsay hanging out together. When they go outside where Sandy is barbequing, they mention that they invited the girls over, to which Sandy tells them he doesn't think that is a good idea. He says that since Lindsay is involved in Caleb's case, the timing isn't good. Ryan agrees but wonders how Lindsay could possibly be involved. Seth and he joke about how Lindsay is a drug dealer or an illegitimate love child of Caleb's. Sandy glares at them, revealing that Caleb is indeed Lindsay's father. He tells them not to tell anyone.

The next morning, Ryan plans to uninvite Lindsay from Chrismukkah, but he asks Seth to uninvite Summer as well, so it doesn't look like Lindsay was the only one. Seth reluctantly agrees, and they both head off to break the news to the girls. When Ryan gets to Lindsay's house though, he sees how excited she is about Chrismukkah and can't break her heart. The same happens with Seth and Summer. She takes him Christmas tree shopping and professes that she believes they are finally becoming just friends. Of course Seth can't uninvite her now. Seth and Ryan return home and confess that they both chickened out.

As everyone is arriving at the Cohen house, Jimmy and Julie sneak off to the kitchen to kiss. Kirsten walks in and sees them close together, but doesn't say anything. When Renee and Lindsay arrive, Lindsay is surprised to find Ryan with Seth, Summer, and Marissa. Renee wasn't planning to attend, but a few minutes later rings the doorbell and asks Kirsten if she can talk to her. At the same moment, Sandy is in the den with Caleb telling him to confess everything.

As Caleb comes in to the kitchen to tell Kirsten the truth, he finds that Renee is already there. Everyone else enters the kitchen at the same moment, including Seth, Summer, Marissa, Ryan, Lindsay, Julie and Jimmy. Everyone wants to know what Caleb has to say, and although he is reluctant once more, he admits that sixteen years ago, he had an affair with Renee, that resulted in a child – Lindsay. With the news, Lindsay storms out of the house, and Renee follows. Caleb tries to apologize to Kirsten, but she slaps him and asks him to leave. He then tries to apologize to Julie, but she slaps him as well, telling him he should be ashamed of himself. Caleb then turns to Marissa, Ryan, Seth, and Summer, who are left standing in silence.

Upstairs, Kirsten is fuming with Sandy for not telling her what he knew. When Caleb comes up to explain, Kirsten throws a vase at him. Seth has followed them all upstairs and advises his grandfather that he should leave. Kirsten barricades herself in the master bathroom.

Across town, Ryan has gone to see Lindsay at her house. When he asks how she is doing, she tells him that she thinks it would be best if they didn't see one another anymore, or at all for that matter. She doesn't want anything to do with the Cohens, and she closes the door on him.

Back at the Cohen house, Summer and Marissa wait for Seth in his room. When Seth joins them, he says that he thinks Chrismukkah should be cancelled. Later, Summer announces that she has a plan for a Chrismukkah miracle.

At the Nichol's, Caleb promises Julie that he has no more secrets, and that he will be free now, and they can get on with their lives. Julie can't believe that he cheated on his wife. Caleb says that he wants it all to be over, and that he needs Julie to forgive him. Julie isn't sure she can do that. She leaves.

Later in the evening, Ryan meets Sandy in the kitchen. Kirsten still hasn't come out of the bathroom and Sandy has given up trying to make her. Ryan wants to give it a try. When he goes up, she won't answer the door for him either, but he asks if they can talk about Lindsay. When Kirsten asks how Lindsay is doing, Ryan says that it depends on whether she figures out that the Cohen family is good at taking in new members. With that, Kirsten comes out of the bathroom. She says that she isn't sure she is ready to accept Lindsay as her sister, but that she does know that Lindsay seems like a great person.

On the water, Marissa and Summer meet Jimmy at his boat. They need a generator for their plan. Before they leave to get the generator, Jimmy asks Marissa if she's talked to her mother lately. She shrugs it off, and leaves with Summer. When they leave, Julie emerges from inside the boat. They have been together again. When Jimmy asks if they are making a mistake, Julie tells him that she wants to be with him.

On the beach, Seth finds Lindsay sitting alone. He tells her that he understands how overwhelming things might seem, but that she is a Cohen now, and he gives her a Christmas stocking. They walk back to her house to find that Kirsten, Ryan, Summer, Marissa, and Sandy are all there waiting. They have decorated her house with lights and Christmas ornaments, and they have put up a tree for her and Renee. Lindsay is overwhelmed, and Kirsten welcomes her to the family. They all celebrate with Egg Nog and Latkes, and a Chrismukkah hymn about Moses and Jesus by Seth.

[edit] Quotes

Lindsay: When I was little, all my friends were waiting for something from Santa, and I was just hoping for something ... anything, from my dad.

Ryan: Still waiting?

Lindsay: Not anymore. Every kid grows up and stops believing in Santa. I stopped believing in my dad.


Summer: Whoa, Coop, I cannot believe your dad lives on a boat. That is SO Miami Vice.

Marissa: You've seen Miami Vice?

Summer: Repeats. My stepmom finds the pastel colors soothing.

Marissa: She's on some interesting drugs these days.

Summer: I'll tell her to keep them away from you.

Seth: (singing) Moses and Jesus, they both had beards.

Sandy: I've had so many clandestine meetings lately I feel like I'm in an Oliver Stone movie.


Seth: Now, we're gonna have to really put our heads together and do some serious Jew-cruitment. Ryan, do you think you can rope in some Hebrews?

Ryan: Blonde hair, blue eyes. Yeah no problem, I'm a natural

Seth: Fair point, my Aryan friend. Now where are we going to find some Jews in Orange County? (Sandy walks in) Father! I have just discovered the ideal job for you this Chrismukkah!

Sandy: Chrismukkah... Leave me out of it.

Kirsten: Oy, humbug.

Seth: Oy, humbug.


Marissa: Last year's holidays were so much better.

Summer: Yeah, I got rejected by Cohen in a wonder woman costume and you got caught shoplifting.

Marissa: Well, at least it was memorable.


Summer: We need a Chrismukkah miracle! (looks at Seth, Marissa, and Ryan who all look doubtful) I have a plan!


Lindsay: (tearfully) This is really weird.

Kirsten: Oh... it's our family.


Seth: Here's the thing. Lindsay, you and I, we're kin.

Lindsay: No! No, we're not!

Seth: Yeah. Yeah, you are. Congratulations. You're a Cohen. Welcome to a world of insecurity and paralyzing self-doubt.


Marissa: You've been talking to her (Julie) a lot lately. You're not, like, becoming friends or anything?

Jimmy: Why? Would that, uh, that be so terrible?

Marissa: Yeah, for you.

Sandy: Facing Kirsten and Julie has got to be better than going to jail.

Caleb: Kirsten, maybe. Not Julie.

Seth: The Chrismukkah backlash, What if it's getting too big and commercial...It's like it started out as this really cool, cult holiday, flying under the cultural radar and then all of the sudden it crosses over. Then there's too much pressure. I mean can it really be the next Thanksgiving? Can it top Halloween?


Kirsten: You gonna answer it?

Julie: Oh, no. It's just Jimmy.

Kirsten: I thought you two were getting along really well.

Julie: What makes you say that?

Kirsten: Last week, when you said that you and Jimmy were getting along really well.

(after being late for a meeting due to being with Jimmy)

Kirsten: Julie are you okay? You seem a little frazzled.

Julie: Yeah, well, I didn't get to blow my hair out this morning so...

Kirsten: I said frazzled, not frizzy.

(after Sandy tells them it is best not to invite Lindsay for Chrismukkah as she is involved in Caleb's case)

Ryan: Yeah, okay. Except, I mean, what does Lindsay have to do with Caleb's case? What is she like, Caleb's hit man, drug dealer?

Seth: Illegitimate love child?

(Sandy glares, confirming Seth's comment)

[edit] Music

[edit] External links