Talk:The Elder Scrolls IV: Knights of the Nine

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Good article The Elder Scrolls IV: Knights of the Nine has been listed as one of the Everyday life good articles under the good article criteria. If you can improve it further, please do. If it no longer meets these criteria, you can delist it, or ask for a reassessment.

Contents

[edit] Michael Kirkbride

Where exactly is your source that says Michael Kirkbride designed the plugin?

Himself, over and over, on the Elder Scrolls forums. JONJONAUG 23:58, 16 January 2007 (UTC)

Kirkbride's forum posts are not credible. He is not an employee at Bethesda . He was a contractor who wrote lore books for the original game, Oblivion. Please stop trying to give him credit for something he did not work on, it is insulting to the actual developers who did work on this project.--Ashileedo 05:37, 20 January 2007 (UTC)

His posts are credible as can be evidenced by his posting of fragments Remandanaand an an excerpt of the Adaballafrom Knights of the Nine before the DCL was released.
On top of this, his style is rather recognizable. 86.80.122.213 15:53, 24 September 2007 (UTC)Proweler

[edit] is there a 360 retail box?

I was under the impression that there was one for the 360 yet I've been unable to locate one and the article makes no mention of one. does one exist? as well as if there is/isn't one is it worth mentioning? Quabarrick 01:44, 12 January 2007 (UTC)

In answer to the above, the Knights of the Nine for Xbox 360 is available for Xbox Live download for I think about $10 - Anonymous Dissident

[edit] Prices

Can someone actually confirm, and change to reflect, what currency is being talked about? --Dayn 11:58, 21 January 2007 (UTC)

Knights of the Nine is available on Xbox Live marketplace for 800 points, which translates to $10 US. The retail box that includes Knights of the Nine, and other downloadable content like Horse Armor Pack, is available in stores for MSRP, $20.--12.145.63.2 21:53, 22 January 2007 (UTC)

[edit] Merge?

because this is just a plug in and not an actual expansion, i purpose merging this with the Oblivion page.—Preceding unsigned comment added by 209.78.202.2 (talk • contribs)

That makes sense to me. What do other editors think? CWC(talk) 08:00, 12 February 2007 (UTC)
Makes sense to me too, except that there is also a proposition to merge Umaril The Unfeathered with this. If that merge happens, then this article should stand on its own. It should also stand on its own if the information in the Umaril article that is extraneous there but would fit here is moved. VoidTalker 18:52, 13 March 2007 (UTC)

[edit] GA review

After looking through the article, I see just a few things that need improvement:

[edit] Infobox

  • The vgrelease template should be used in the publishers section if there were different publishers in different regions.
  • What engine did the game use?
  • Wouldn't the Xbox 360 version ship on a DVD, and the PlayStation 3 version on a Blu-Ray Disc?
  • Just a note in-line here — actually, the Xbox 360 release was only available through an Xbox Marketplace download. You're right on the other points, though. Geuiwogbil (Talk) 03:15, 2 September 2007 (UTC)

[edit] Lead

  • You don't need to say that it's a single player game in the lead, as that's already explained in the infobox.
  • The metacritic scores aren't need here, because they're mentioned later on. Simply say, "Knights of the Nine was generally well-received in the gaming press. Although it made little change to the basic mechanics of Oblivion, it was praised by most as a brief and polished addition to the game's main plot."

[edit] Plot

  • "The player pledges to the prophet that he will quest for the relics, and will destroy Umaril completely"
Remove the second "will" (redundant). Also, remove the comma.
  • "he had not destroyed his spirit."
Reword to "He had not destroyed Umaril's spirit." (Eliminates confusion.)
  • "and will destroy Umaril completely, in a way Pelinal had not."
Do you mean that the player will accomplish what Pelinal failed to? If that is the case, just say so.
  • "Along the way, the player re-creates the Knights of the Nine"
"Re-create"? How, by sorcery? An ancient spirit-dance or something...? Explain.
  • "The items united, and the Knights reborn, the player sets off to fight Umaril in his fane at Garlas Malatar."
"The items"? I think you mean relics, right? Also, what's a fane? (Provide a wikilink if one exists.)
  • "The Knights fight through Umaril's minions"
Replace "fight through" with "fight and defeat" (or destroy, depending on what works better.)
  • "The player follows Umaril on to the spirit realm"
Try "into" instead of "on to".

I have to go, but I'll get the rest tomorrow. Until then, consider the article on hold. Green451 03:04, 2 September 2007 (UTC)

Much thanks for the review! I've fixed everything you've brought up. Geuiwogbil (Talk) 03:24, 2 September 2007 (UTC)
No problem, happy to help! That was pretty fast. Now for the rest of the article:

[edit] Production, release, and availability

  • "criticism by customers do to its alleged low value"
"do" should be "due".
  • "As of August 2006, one Bethesda employee wrote in a post to Bethesda's Elder Scrolls forums, the company had "no plans to make an expansion for Oblivion"."
"In", not "As of" (past-tense/present-tense conflict). Also, the second comma should be replaced with the word "that".
  • "Further questions were raised by a product listing found on GameStop's website"
GameStop's a software retailer, right? We don't have them here in Canada, so for the benefit of the international community, it's always a good idea to clarify these things. I can see you have in a few other places.
  • "The title was kept on the website only briefly — removed after gaming news site GameSpot had sent a request for comment to Bethesda."
You can use a comma there instead of a dash.
  • "press release announced that Knights of the Nine content was scheduled for PC and Xbox 360 releases"
"also scheduled" would emphasize the non-exclusivity better, I think. (Wow, that was a mouthful...)
  • "The October press release set a planned release date for the Xbox 360 and PC releases"
There were two October press releases mentioned earlier. For the sake of clarity, say which one.
  • "Bethesda later clarified earlier statements regarding PC releases, stating that although the boxed retail PC edition Knights of the Nine was set for release on November 21, the standalone Knights of the Nine download from the company website wouldn't be available until December 4, 2006."
"later clarified earlier"? That's a bit roundabout. Find a way to get some distance between these two concepts. Also, it should be "boxed retail PC edition of" the game. Finally, pluralize "company".
  • "The downloadable release had a price of US$9.99."
the references says the the download version was released after the retail one. Mention this. Something like, "Later, a downloadable release was issued at a price of US$9.99.", or similar.

[edit] Reception

  • "GameSpot recommended the game for its value; although it made few improvements over the basic Oblivion experience, Knights of the Nine provides "a good day or two's worth of questing for a low price"."
Replace the semicolon with ", saying that"
  • "doesn't really change the game's gameplay"."
To clarify, try ""doesn't really change [Oblivion's] gameplay".
  • "Eurogamer praised the game for its memorable plot, and its new and unique content."
Try "Eurogamer praised the game for its memorable plot and new, unique content."
  • "Eurogamer concluded that"
You don't need to say their name again. "They" will suffice.
  • "if fans were to fully accept individually priced content releases, Eurogamer's review suggested"
On a similar theme, try replacing their name with "the site" here.
  • In the reviews and awards box, you should mention which version was reviewed for each.

[edit] External links

  • Remove the link to the online download; it treads a little too close to providing advertisement, similar to if you were to add the Amazon.com link to the boxed version.
  • I'm uncomfortable with doing this. It's the closest thing to an "official site" for the entity available, and different from an Amazon link in that Amazon is a third-party, where Bethesda Softworks' own page is first-party. I know "Links mainly intended to promote a website" are to be avoided, but in WP:EL policy that recommendation is prefaced by a note explaining that "the subject of the article or an official page of the article subject" is an exception to that rule. I don't think removing that link is a good idea. Geuiwogbil (Talk) 01:46, 3 September 2007 (UTC)

And one more thing I forgot: The infobox should contain the PC system requirements.

Everything else looks great. I just made a few really small formatting and grammar changes that were left over from my last round of comments, but I do typically prefer the editor to do the work themselves, hence all these comments.

Once all of the above issues have been worked out, I'll give the article GA status. Great working with you! Green451 01:00, 3 September 2007 (UTC)

It's been great working with you, too! I've made all your requested changes, save for the removal of the external link to the official site. Geuiwogbil (Talk) 01:46, 3 September 2007 (UTC)

All right. I guess that technically, that is the official site of the expansion, so I'll let that go. This is now officially a Good Article! Cheers, Green451 01:57, 3 September 2007 (UTC)

Much thanks! Geuiwogbil (Talk) 01:59, 3 September 2007 (UTC)