Tentacles of Doom
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| “Tentacles Of Doom” | |
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| Father Ted episode | |
| Episode no. | Season 2 Episode 3 |
| Written by | Graham Linehan, Arthur Mathews |
| Directed by | Declan Lowney |
| Guest stars | Kevin Moore (Bishop O'Neill), Denys Hawthorne (Bishop Fachs), Paddy Ward (Bishop Jordan), Tony Guilfoyle (Fr. Larry Duff) |
| Original airdate | 22 March 1996 |
| Season 2 episodes | |
| Father Ted - Series 2 8 March 1996 – 10 May 1996 |
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| Series 3 → | |
| List of Father Ted episodes | |
"Tentacles Of Doom" is the 3rd episode of the second series of Channel 4 sitcom Father Ted and the 9th episode overall.
[edit] Synopsis
The episode begins with Dougal reading a book of 'Gary Lineker's Ghost Stories', supposedly too scary to complete - followed by a discussion with Ted on ghost sightings (following a rambling 'scary' story, neither has seen any - Dougal's 'ghost' in fact being Ted himself). While dealing with serious plumbing problems at the parochial house, Ted receives some bad news. He learns that the nearby Holy Stone of Clonrichert is being upgraded to a "class two relic" by the Vatican. Three bishops are to be sent to Craggy Island to perform the ceremony. This means that the priests must be "on their best behavior". Ted realizes that Father Jack, in his perpetual drunken state, stands to offend the bishops. He sets out to train Jack to say some all-encompassing phrases, apart from his usual stream of obscenities. After much effort, Jack is able to enunciate "Yes" and "that would be an ecumenical matter".
When the bishops arrive, the priests manage to interact fairly normally with the visitors. One, Bishop O'Neill, even goes so far as to say that Jack will make a valuable contribution during their visit. Another, Bishop Fachs, dominates conversation with enthusiastic rhetoric about improving the church's image. The oldest, Bishop Jordan, remains mainly contemplative. The ceremony passes without incident and the priests and bishops begin to interact on a one-to-one basis. Father Ted is thoroughly confused by Bishop Jordan's thoughts on mortality and asks to be excused for a trip to the toilet. Unfortunately, Bishop Jordan situates himself above the drain where the parochial house's sewage is fired into the air in lieu of proper disposal. When Ted flushes, the old man is incapacitated.
Dougal and Bishop O'Neill share a conversation. Dougal talks about the doubts he has regarding organized religion and the Catholic Church. The bishop listens in earnest. Meanwhile, Bishop Fachs becomes increasingly aggressive with Father Jack at the relic site. Finally, Jack loses the restraint he had practiced as he attacks Bishop Fachs and inserts the Holy Stone into his rectum. The last scene shows Bishop O'Neill embracing Dougal's jumbled philosophy as he gives up the church for a life as a hippie. Bishop Fachs, clearly in agony, is escorted away for medical attention. It is then revealed that Bishop Jordan has died, as his coffin is taken from the parochial house. When all have gone, Ted reflects on the visit, thinking it went rather well.
[edit] External links
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