User:StreetballazCrunk/Stoplight (basketball)

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Stoplight was a famous streetball player, born in Round Rock, Texas in an indeterminate year to a woman who went by the name of Serenity DeMichaels. However, it was later found, after her tragic death in a traffic accident, that this name was merely an alias. His father was unknown. Because Stoplight was only referred to by his street name and his lineage is unclear, his true name is a mystery. ^[1]

The details regarding his accomplishments have largely been embellished due to the theatrical, dramatic, and often false nature of streetball in general. Even his supposed death was greatly exaggerated and most likely staged for dramatic effect to heighten the drama surrounding the sport of Streetball.

Contents 1 Early Years 2 Rise to Fame 2.1 Complications 3 The Stoplight Crew 4 Road to the National Championship 5 Stoplight's Presumed Death 5.1 The Game 5.2 The Final Shot 6 Aftermath and Legacy 7 References

[edit] Early Years

Stoplight began playing basketball at the age of 7 with his friends in the local basketball court. He quickly proved to be a savant at the sport, achieving feats still unparalleled for his age. He currently holds the record in the Guinness Book of World Records for the youngest child to successfully slam dunk, at the age of 11. This was due, in part, to his large size. In a school photograph at the age of 12, he is estimated at approximately 6'1". He would later reach a peak height of 6'11".^[2]

Stoplight's passion was basketball, although he dabbled in other sports. After dropping out of high school, he played for a local arena football team, where he met his future coach, Charles McGuffin. After seeing potential in Stoplight, McGuffin quickly took him under his wing, and redirected his efforts back to basketball. It was here that he reunited with his former best friend, who went by the similar nickname, Stopsign.

[edit] Rise to Fame

With the help of McGuffin, Stoplight and Stopsign quickly pulled together a streetballing crew that would go on to devastate at the local and national levels. Another longtime friend, Gullett, joined the group, and the core of the original Crew was formed. One of the most notable performances was in 2001 in the State Championship. The final game, predicted to be a ferocious shootout against the Houston-based Crunksville Krew, was the first and only shutout in the record of Texas streetball. ^[3]

[edit] Complications

After their stunning victory and claiming of the title of Texas State Champion, Stoplight and his Crew were quickly courted by local NBA teams. Staying true to his origins, Stoplight denied the advances of NBA scouts, however, Stopsign and Gullett decided to leave Stoplight, and they signed with the Orlando Magic. Both were quickly cut after proving unable to adjust to the considerably less physical playing style of the NBA.

Both Stopsign and Gullett would try to reunite with Stoplight, however, Stoplight was once quoted as saying, "The damage is done, y'all. The damage is done." By defecting from the Crew, they ended the possibility of Stoplight achieving his dream: leading his team to the National Streetball Championship. By winning the Texas championship in 2001, they achieved a qualifying position for the National Championship, however, a rule in the bylaws of streetball states that "...a qualified team must consist of the same five members during the National Championship as it did during the Qualifying Tournament...". Upset at the shunning, Stopsign and Gullett would go on to form the Stopsign Crew as a rival team.

[edit] The Stoplight Crew

Stoplight would go on to gather together longtime friends Cubic, Cottonhead, Steezy, and The Teacher to make a second bid at the National Championship. Taking three years off from professional streetballing, Stoplight devoted his time to training these four players. It was during this period he enlisted the help, once again, of McGuffin, to train the youths for the physical rigors of streetball. After intense training, Stoplight deemed them ready, and they prepared for the Texas Championships, with the appropriately named Stoplight Crew^[4].

[edit] Road to the National Championship

The Stoplight Crew took the 2004 State Championship with ease in a surprisingly well-fought game against the Dallas-based Lien-Sippin' Niggaz. ^[5] They then traveled to New York City to the basketball courts of Rucker Park, in Harlem. They beat several very competent teams, and eventually advanced to the quarterfinal round. It was here that they staged an epic upset of the Venice Beach Landlordz. During this game, Stoplight scored 92 points, and made a near impossible full-court shot. After stealing the ball, Stoplight took two steps and stopped, preventing him from moving further for fear of double dribbling. Rather than pass the ball, Stoplight hurled it across the court towards the Landlordz' goal, and amazingly, it fell into the basket. The court nearly erupted in cheers of disbelief, and home video footage was required to verify the feat.^[6] In the semi-finals, the Crew played against Detroit's severely overmatched Popadiddy Crunk. Outscoring the Crunk nearly 4 to 1, the Crew easily advanced to the finals.

[edit] Stoplight's Presumed Death

The final match was against none other than the Stopsign Crew, spearheaded by Gullett and Stopsign.

[edit] The Game

The game itself was exceptionally close, hard fought until the end. After a particularly controversial play, Stoplight and Stopsign confronted each other in the middle of the court. The game ceased but the game time continued to run out as the two engaged in a shouting match. Stopsign gave Stoplight a hefty shove, spilling Stoplight's purple drink all over himself. This infuriated Stoplight, who punched Stopsign in the stomach, heaving him back several yards onto the ground. Stoplight began wringing the everclear used in his drink out of his jersey, when Stopsign rushed up and brandished a pistol which was tucked in his jersey. As he pulled the trigger, Stoplight quickly knocked his hand away so the bullet fired harmlessly into the pole holding up the basketball net.

[edit] The Final Shot

In a horrifying set of circumstances, the sparks from the ricocheting bullet ignited the everclear on Stoplight's jersey, sending him into a torrent of flames. Horrified, Stopsign fell away, as the crowd screamed with simultaneous rage and disbelief. In his final moments, Stoplight glanced towards the game clock, which had five seconds left. He ran, still on fire, down the court. He picked up the ball off the center court line, and from there, slammed dunked the ball as the buzzer wemt off.^[7]

[edit] Aftermath and Legacy

The Stoplight Crew was devastated. The ball used to make the final shot was permanently burned with the handprint of Stoplight. Written on the ball with marker was Stoplight's final farewell: "Six more years..." To this day, the 2004-2005 National Championship is held in contention, as the specifics and legalities of Stoplight's final play have been exhaustively argued and questioned.

[edit] References