User:slakr

• My name is Kurt.
• I'm 23, but at times I feel like I'm 73.
• I'm from hell Dallas, Texas.
• I'm an administrator (verify), so if you need help with something that requires such a creature, drop a message on my talk page. If it's urgent or the input of multiple admins is required, try asking on the incidents noticeboard. Cheers :)

1. The Internet is the last bastion of true free speech.
2. Wikipedia embodies free speech at its finest. I think it does a better job at filtering fact from fiction than real life ever could. Seriously, how often can you slap a {{fact}} tag on someone's nonsense? How often can they slap one on you back? How often are they actually verified? Even better, we don't have to worry as much about corporate interests, liberal/conservative bias, and/or campaign contributions. Everyone keeps everyone else in check-- without guns, bombs, white ghost costumes, or other attacks.
3. I like to learn, and I wish more people did too.

• I find profound joy in reverting vandalism and spam. I mean, it's kind of like walking down a street, seeing a badly-graffitied wall, and being able to magically wave a magic wand to make it go away. I encourage everyone to check out the recent changes portion of the site and do the same.

• I especially have an interest in AI and finding ways to automate that and other tasks using heuristic analysis.

• I sometimes suck at making things pretty. I kinda sorta somewhat try, though. If something I edit isn't wiki-pretty... or, witty, if you will... then please, please correct me (and my bad puns, while you're at it) :P.

• If you don't know me intimately, you'll think I'm extroverted. I'm not really this nerdy in real life. Well, then again, I suppose it depends who you're talking to. :P

• If you saw me in real life, you would probably assume I'm the type of person who would use his cd tray for a cup holder. Wait a second... *looks at his tower* Yep, yep, you'd be 100% correct on that one. Since my old sony dvd-rom quit working, I actually do sometimes use it for a cupholder. Obviously I yanked the power cord out and used the ide for other things, but it does still look funny to see that in an otherwise stereotypically nerdy setup of two monitors, stacks of papers with "gibberish" written on them, and "guts" hanging out of my box's open case.

• I've never been much of a gamer-- I've always much more preferred to metaphorically help write the game itself.

• I like bulleted lists, but I try not to use them elsewhere because the {{prose}} tag and I are friends, and I try not to make it angry or it might find its way back to me. :P

• My sleep schedule is perpetually funky. It's like my body is set to a 25 hour cycle that invariably ends up always making me gradually stay up and sleep in later-- all over the course of a few weeks. It's annoying, to say the least. Maybe it's because I'm of Romanian descent and I was originally a vampire or something. I do have a weird thing for necks.  :o[...

• If you have any questions, I'll try as best as I can to answer them. Either check out my talk page or stick a {{helpme}} on your user talk page and someone will drop by to assist you. Cheers =)

Stuff
General
in progress	done	planned	meh.
beta	eek! it broke!		canceled
R and D
deferred	expedited	stalled	merged
snagged		need consensus

For completed/inactive stuff, check out the archives

[edit] bots

Bots are automated programs that help with trivial tasks. They aren't human, but they aren't quite inhuman, either, because at some point someone has to make them behave like a human. They're kind of like zombies-- except they don't crave brains. My bots are the exception, because they actually do crave brains-- and Cheez-its-- that is, brains and cheez-its. Let me know if any of them give you trouble; or, if you're an administrator, use the handy dandy emergency shutdown link to send you to the bot's block page.

I am currently (04:34, 5 December 2007 (UTC)) developing the PHP Wikipedia Bot Framework, for those people who would rather use the php-cli to run bots. Most questions/bug reports should go on the sourceforge project page.

SineBot (talk • contribs • count • total • block log) · (emergency shutdown)

[ whiteboard ] A bot to fill in for User:HagermanBot (proactively).

EyeBot (talk • contribs • count • total • block log) · (emergency shutdown)

[ whiteboard ] Uses image similarity algorithms to implement image blacklists, locate duplicate images that aren't bit-for-bit, and link images to probable subjects.

[edit] wiki

Stuff related solely to wikimedia and its content.

User:Slakr/WikiMonkey.

[ script; whiteboard ] A thinggymabobber for performing random tasks that I haven't been able to find (or haven't been able to find that work the same way) in other scripts.

[edit] mediawiki

Stuff related to modifying MediaWiki's actual code and/or adding extensions. If you have any problems with these, please do not contact me directly. Instead, submit a bug.

XCache support

[ patch; done ] Adds XCache support to Mediawiki 1.10.0. Added to SVN as of revision 22842.

arrseeD

[ patch; whiteboard ] A high-volume, event-driven socket server for the recent changes list.

Spam blacklist changes

[ patch; whiteboard ] Update Tim's blacklist extension to be faster and use less regexes, since we're getting close to hitting the limits giving preg an aneurysm.

• Add stuff to my talk page. Just be sure not to remove anything; otherwise, you might make somebody else sad that you deleted his/her comment. :(
• E-mail me. Also works, but you're less likely to get a response back from there because I don't like responding to emails-- I do enough of that when I work. :P
• IRC: slakr@freenode. My preferred method of two-way communication-- if I'm active, at least. :D
  • #mediawiki. When I'm in a coding mood.
  • #stressed. My personal channel. If I'm not there, just leave a message. Beware, I or others may be testing random things there, so you temporarily might not be able to get in.

• The barn for the stars
• Just plain fun.
  • Trusting Wikipedia
  • Wiki Whiteboard To-do #4: Secure apartment against raptors.

• Favorite wiki things
  • Wikipedia:Do NOT bite the developers
  • Why we're really here.
  • Image:Symbol_full_support_vote.PNG - rare footage of a support vote in telophase of mitosis.
  • Daemon (computer software) - two reasons: "fork off and die," and inclusion of the classic Evi Nemeth quote
  • Newcomers are delicious, so go ahead and bite them - particularly Saturn's approach
  • Nobody cares
  • Everybody cares
  • AAAAAAAAA!
  • Masturbation
  • Hitler - it's not what you think; or, maybe it is-- you smart cookie, you.
  • Friends of gays should not be allowed to edit articles.
  • Wikipedia:Errors in the Encyclopædia Britannica that have been corrected in Wikipedia - this one makes me happy.
  • AFD close reason for WP:SNOW.
  • Taumatawhakatangihangakoauauotamateapokaiwhenuakitanatahu