Rab Corbett
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Rab Corbett is the name of a persona who made a number of prank calls in Scotland at some point in the late-1990s. Using the Scottish vernacular and copious amounts of swearing, the calls were mainly directed at businesses in and around the city of Paisley, Scotland and have achieved cult status in Scotland.
The calls were made by a group of guys from Paisley who have subsequently kept their identities hidden. This is due to some of the recipients of the calls not being too happy. Radio Clyde's George Bowie had nothing to do with the project.
The group called themselves Hang Up and the disc was titled Never Mind The Jerkys Here's Hang Up.
In 1998, the compilation of calls was released as a CD on the God Bless Records label. The catalogue number is NOIR 008CD. God Bless is the record label of former Teenage Fanclub member Brendan O'Hare.
After initial release the tracks were ripped-off to cassette tape. Although some tapes were done by the group as various version existed with tracks that didn't make the CD. These tapes were subsequently converted to MP3 and RealMedia files and posted on the Internet a few years after their initial circulation. Nowadays they are common as ringtones within certain sections of the Scottish population.
The caller also uses the names Charlie Joe, Dr Raymond McKenzie and Afrik Jahal. In one of the calls and refers to his mother as Mavis Corbett.
[edit] Transcript of Snudge
| Phone rings twice. | |
| Garage | Hullo. |
| Caller | Awright bawbag? Look, ah've got a problem, but it's your fuckin' problem now 'cause ah need a bonnet — for ma motor. What you got for me? 'Cause ah put it into a lamppost. |
| Garage | Wha'? |
| Caller | Ah put it into a lamppost, and ah need a bonnet now. |
| Garage | [perplexed] |
| Caller | You got one? It's a Nissan Cherry. |
| Garage | A Nissan Cherry — wha' year? |
| Caller | Ah? Ah don't know — it's an E — E–reggie. |
| Garage | You got an E–reggie Cherry bunnet, Snudge? |
| Caller | Snudge! |
| Garage | . . . Wha'? |
| Caller | Snudge! Is that his name? |
| Garage | Aye how? |
| Caller | [interrupts] That's a fuckin' stupid name. |
| Garage | A bit like you, then, eh? |
| Caller | Hey! Don't you start wae me, ya poofy prick! Lose the attitude! |
| Garage | [excited] Who're you talkin' to, ya fuckin' ride?! Don't you . . . |
| Caller | [interrupts] Hey! Don't you start! |
| Garage | Ya prick! |
| Caller | Aye! Ah know who you are! |
| Garage | Dae ye! |
| Caller | Aye! Yer that poofy lookin' guy wi' the dark hair! |
| Garage | An' you're a wank! |
| Caller | Ah how? What do you say? Don't you start that wi' me! |
| Garage | An' wha' you gonna do, ya fuckin' ride? |
| Caller | Hey! Are you gonna get me this bonnet for me, or what? |
| Garage | Ah'll put a bunnet oor your heid, you start yer attitude wi' me, ya fuckin' ride! |
| Caller | Ah'll take a hammer tae you! |
| Garage | You'll take a hammer to who?! Ya fuckin' prick! |
| Caller | Ah'll take a hammer . . . ah! [defeated] |
| Garage | Yer a wank! |
| Call ends. |
