Wikipedia:Peer review/Super Crazy/archive1

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[edit] Super Crazy

I made a number of edits to this page, adding more information about his ECW and independent career. I'd like to know what people think. 44 05:13, 3 August 2007 (UTC)

This article appears to be fairly content-full. The first thing I noticed was the non-verified tag. The second thing I noticed was a red link for the image. The lead section is a bit short (should be 1-2 paragraphs for this length article), and its not clear to a non-wrestling fan like myself. (e.g., what is "RAW Brand") The Lead section should be able to explain the entire article to a no-brainer with enough detail that I don't need to read the rest. Perhaps:
Francisco Pantoja Islas (best known by his ring name Super Crazy) was born on December 3rd, 1973. He is a Mexican professional wrestler who is currently signed to World Wrestling Entertainment and performing in the RAW brand category. Super Crazy has fought for Extreme Championship Wrestling, Independent circuit and World Wrestling Entertainment. He is known for his signature line "I am super! I am crazy! I am...Super Crazy!"
The career section is very large and detailed, although it can be a bit difficult to read for a non wrestling fan. The other sections seem fairly empty in comparison to the career section. The "Wrestling facts" is a bad section for an article (its like Trivia (see WP:Trivia). Much better would be to change that to "Finishing and signature moves", and to move the one quote somewhere else (perhaps the intro as per my example), or come up with a few more quotes and make a section of it. Also, that section needs paragraphs and sentences, and explanation. (e.g.: Missile dropkick - Jumping off the turnbuckle and kicking the standing opponent) take a look at Wikipedia:Explain jargon. The entire article is a tad Jargonish actually. Another section that needs sentences is Championships and accomplishments.
The personal life section needs expanding. (and why is is last name used, instead of his first name?) When was he married? What are the kids names and ages? What does his wife do? Where do they live (not a full address...) How does he recreate? Where did he grow up? Parents names? Uncle with one eye? Lastly, this article needs Images. Portrait in the box, a few of him fighting or doing some move on a guy, winning a big trophy. anything. Sorry if I have been harsh, and sorry for my factual non-accuracy (I know nothing about wrestling). Best of luck. --TheJosh 12:18, 5 August 2007 (UTC)

[edit] Automated Peer Review

The following suggestions were generated by a semi-automatic javascript program, and might not be applicable for the article in question.

You may wish to browse through User:AndyZ/Suggestions for further ideas. Thanks, Davnel03 15:03, 14 August 2007 (UTC)

I've got a couple of input that'll help make this article more well rounded - a couple of quick ones really.
    1. This article is CRIMINALLY short on his pre-WWE time and then goes almost in the opposite direction and gets bloated with details the second he hits the WWE. it's a classic issue that a ton of wrestling articles suffer from and it's very evident here.
    2. The section of Crazy's personal life reads like a trivia bullet point list, expand the prose a bit so it's not just two lines
    3. Sources, sources and sources - I don't think I really need to say more right?

Just my first impression of the article. MPJ-DK 18:51, 14 August 2007 (UTC)