Wikipedia:Peer review/Robert of Jumièges/archive1

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[edit] Robert of Jumièges

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I've listed this article for peer review because I would like to take it to FAC at some point, and need help identifying jargon, prose concerns, and anything that isn't clear to a non-medievalist.

Thanks, Ealdgyth - Talk 15:59, 24 April 2008 (UTC)

Ruhrfisch comments: Interesting article, will try to look at it from a FA/FAC standpoint. Most of these will be fairly nit-picky. Here are some suggestions for improvement:

  • While there is no length requirement for FA, this is fairly short - my guess is that this is about all that is known about him, but I think some more background might help make the article clearer and expand it a bit in the process.
  • Since his date of death is uncertain, should that be made clearer in the lead? Also is there any sort of guess as to his year of birth?
  • The main suggestion I have is to provide context for the reader WP:PCR to make things clearer for those not as familiar with this era of history.
  • Specific examples where more context is needed
    • Do not need to wikilink William the Conqueror twice in the lead (in two sentences) and it might not be clear to everyone that "future king William of Normandy" is the same as "Duke William".
    • Identify William of Jumièges, perhaps as "medieval historian William of Jumièges"? in the lead. I also assume he was no relation - is this worth saying?
    • Explain why "Edward the Confessor was still in exile in Normandy"
    • Similarly explain "the party opposed to Earl Godwin."
    • Explain simony - presumably the king sold the chruch office?
    • Why did Godwin return from exile?
    • Why was Robert outlawed and deposed on September 14, 1052.[8]?
  • Cite saints generally do not divorce their wives because the wife is barren. Nor do saints concern themselves with the need to provide themselves with heirs. sounds like Original research otherwise.
  • Missing word When Godwin [returned?] from exile in 1052 Robert left England quickly,[17]
  • Is the Sacramentarium in the infobox the same as the Missal he gave? If so or if not, make it clearer please.
  • Second paragraph of "Outlawed, death, and legacy" is very disjointed - two sentences on his death, one on his Missal, then the rest on his role in William the Conqueror invading England.
  • Be more specific - It has been argued that Robert brought the style with him... who argues this?

Overall quite interesting and what is there is well done, I just think it needs more background and context for clarity. Ruhrfisch ><>°° 03:20, 27 April 2008 (UTC)