Wikipedia:Peer review/Evan Mecham/archive1

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[edit] Evan Mecham

I have been tinkering with this article for a while and believe it is time to have a few more people take a look at it. Due to the nature of the material, accusations of racism, cronyism, criminal wrongdoing, and spying with laser beams, I have been careful with my references but it is possible that some bias may be present. Mostly looking for information on areas this article needs further expansion, but assistance with copyeditting or POV problems are also appreciated. --Allen3 ^talk 15:15, 20 October 2005 (UTC)

Hmmm....

1. You could definately get away with one nice long paragraph here for a lead - just combine those and make it longer
2. Short paragraphs throughout article
3. "After office" and "Legacy" are super-short
4. "Removal efforts" - could use an intro and some context, same for "Governorship"
5. Pictures? External links?

Good luck :). Ryan Norton ^{T | @ | C} 22:30, 21 October 2005 (UTC)

Thanks for the feedback. Tony's copyeditting took care of much of the issue with short paragraphs and I have attempted to fix the other issues mentioned in your first four items. Pictures and external links are a tougher problem. The obvious candidates (located at [1], [2], and [3]) all have copyright concerns, and my comfort level with making a fair use argument is low. As Wikipedia:Requested copyright examinations appears to be effectively dead, I have submitted a request to Wikipedia:Requested pictures. The only potential external link I have located, that is not a newspaper or magazine article or a library/archive catalog entry, is http://www.idir.net/~cnc/members.htm. I am reluctant to add this as I see little value added by the link, and the site appears to have been abandoned since 1999. --Allen3 ^talk 11:52, 30 October 2005 (UTC)

• It's good; I've done a quick edit on it, and added a few inline comments. I think it's overlinked, particularly the low-value chronological links and commonly known nouns (e.g., 'Christian' might be linked if you'd made a point about how his political views had been affected by his religious upbringing, but as is, the article on Christianity is too broad to shed light on this topic). Perhaps see See Wikipedia:Make only links relevant to the context, Wikipedia:Manual of Style (links)#Internal links and Wikipedia:Manual of Style (dates and numbers)#Date formatting. Please check that all of the reference numbers are jammed up against the previous character (or with a non-breaking space, but consistently). Tony 02:33, 22 October 2005 (UTC)

Thank you for your help in copyeditting. I have addressed your inline comments and thinned a lot of the links with minimal value to the article as you indicated. I also believe that all of the reference numbers are currently handled in a consistent manor. --Allen3 ^talk 12:29, 30 October 2005 (UTC)