User:Pants 3000

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Hello, whoever may be looking at this right now. I am Pants 3000. Strange name, I know; I don't care. I've been a Wikipedia user since April 15, 2007. I'm also on Homestar Runner Wiki. I am fluent in English and French. I am also learning Dutch. I live in Canada, that place way up north, for those of you that don't know what Canada is. I wish to visit Holland and Scotland sometime soon, for I have not been to Holland and I haven't visited Scotland in 7 years.

I am an avid reader and I am a fan of science fiction, fantasy, and mystery. I love music, and I listen to mostly heavy metal bands such as Lamb of God, Megadeth, Metallica, and Iron Maiden. I play the drums, bass guitar, and both electric and acoustic guitar.

My watchlist consists of 5 pages so far. Don't vandalise 'em or I get ya! And possibly some bots will get ya! I don't know, depends who's faster!

Userboxes Name This user's name is Josh . This user is male. This user eats cheese. This user enjoys playing chess. sar-N This user is a native speaker of sarcasm. Isn't that just great? This user has an iPod. This user is interested in astronomy. This user is Canadian, eh? This user is a cat lover. This user is a child at heart. They may have grown older but they'll never grow up. ∞ This user is an ageless Immortal. This user is proud to be Scottish. This user is Dutch. BRO This user has a Big Brother This user's favorite Wikipedian is Radical3. PANTERA This user makes good friends and a bottle of pills. SOAD Banana banana banana banana terracotta banana terracotta terracotta pie! BS This user is a fan of Black Sabbath. Here's another clue for you all. The Walrus was this user. band This user plays in a band. This user plays the bass guitar. This user is a drummer. This user plays the guitar. This user enjoys heavy metal music. * This user needs more cowbell. This user plays ultimate. This user just LOVES to cycle! This user enjoys llama racing. This user is a cross country runner. This user has completed a 5K. This user plays badminton. This user plays football, but prefers to call it soccer. Dr. Who "I say...would you like a Jelly Baby?" Matrix This user knows that there is no spoon. This user should have bought a squirrel. H * R This user is a fan of Homestar Runner. Seriously. THIS USER'S HEAD ASPLODE. This user's cats have their own userbox. END This user has no more userboxes.

[edit] Cool people of whom you might know...

• Radical3 - Good friend of mine. Known him for a while.
• Dora Nichov - Met this user through the latter user. Pretty cool.
• So far thats it...but I'll meet more people...

[edit] Poetry: Can it still be cool?

Yes!!! Here are some cool poems I wrote!

Morning dawns, I awaken.

Under the cupboard lie

Four muffins. Only the greatest

Food to ever be eaten by humans.

I ate them in five minutes,

Now I go back to

Sleep, dreaming about muffins.

There once was a man from Nantucket.

He liked sit his rear on a bucket.

He took it downtown,

And he said with a frown,

"Oh crap! I can't find the muppets!"

Fatty McGee

There once was a boy named Fatty McGee,

He was much, much larger than you or me.

For breakfast he had six Big Macs and a shake.

When he fell, he created a devastating earthquake.

His hips were the width of the Hiroshima bomb,

This is also why he never got asked to the prom.

One day, Fatty had consumed so much food,

He blew up and was no longer fat, I conclude.

TV

Look at me, Look at me, Look at me, Look at me,

Look at me, Look at me, Look at me, Look at me,

Look at me, Look at me, Look at me, Look at me,

DON'T TURN AWAY!

Look at me, Look at me, Look at me, Look at me,

Look at me, Look at me, Look at me, Look at me,

Look at me, Look at me, Look at me, Look at me,

I'm off.....

[edit] Dino Story

Well, not actually about dinosaurs, but marine reptiles. I loved the Walking with Dinosaurs episode Cruel Sea that I made my own story similar to the events of Cruel Sea.

The Silent Deep

A story based on Walking with Dinosaurs: Cruel Sea

It began in the shallow waters of what is now Europe. The large congregation of pregnant Ophthalmosaurus had all gathered together from the deeper waters to give birth. Unlike most sea reptiles, the Ophthalmosaurus gave live births underwater. The first newborn pups had arrived and were already speeding to the water’s surface to take their first breaths.

One Ophthalmosaurus had given birth to two of her three offspring, and they were both large and healthy. The final, however, refused to escape. It stayed where it was, not wanting to leave the safety of its mother. The female desperately tried to get rid of the pup, for she was allure to sharks at the surface. Finally, she expelled her stubborn pup and it swam up to take its breath.

Culdo, he was named. The youngest and smallest of the pups. He looked around; staring at the whole new world he would soon call his home. Almost immediately, he glided down towards the crags of coral, to be safe from other Ophthalmosaurus mothers who were willing to eat the offspring of others. Scared, Culdo swam towards the coral reef, wishing the other Ophthalmosaurus would leave.

Suddenly, Culdo sensed something behind him. He turned to see huge jaws lined with separate sets of teeth. Sharks had closed in to eat during this frenzy. Culdo, flew through the waters as fast as his five-minute old body would allow him. The sharks were closing in fast, perfect killing machines designed to seek and destroy. Almost at the coral, Culdo felt the water rush behind him as the sharks’ jaws snapped in anticipation. One last burst of speed and Culdo had found safe refuge in the network of caves amongst the reef barrier.

Floating along through the caverns, Culdo made an attempt to peer outside. The coast was safe, so he swam out to learn more about the world around him. Free at last from the many dangers, he flew through the crystal clear waters. Observing the floating ammonites, he casually pecked at one, but failed to open its shell. In the end, he swam on, knowing that its shell was too tough for his newborn teeth.

Two weeks later, Culdo had been growing fast on his seafood diet. However, still vulnerable to shark attacks, he had spent most of his time hiding amongst the heads of coral. his predators had one advantage over him, though. Culdo needed to return to the surface to receive air, while the sharks did not. Feeling the need to breathe, Culdo carefully edged his way out of the coral. Almost immediately, a shark sped towards him, jaws open for the kill. Culdo reared up quickly, just ducking out of harms way. Knowing that if he did not breathe soon he would suffocate, he backed up and sped out the other end. He knew the shark was pursuing him, but he had speed to his advantage. The cumbersome shark slowly fell behind and Culdo broke the surface, brething in the cool ocean air. He was safe, until his next encounter with a shark.

Culdo spent a lot of time searching for squid and fish in the depths of the ocean. Near sundown, he swam to the surface and watched the Cryptoclidus head for the rocky ledges, where they remained in safety from other the creatures below. At night, Culdo hunted just as well as he hunted during the day. He picked out squid that swam too close to the coral in the gloom with his massive eyes. On one full moon, he found a large procession of strange-looking horseshoe crabs making their way to the beach. He tried to peck open one of the shells but, like the ammonites’, it was much too solid.

After several weeks, Culdo was almost big enough to abscond from his sheltered life amid the coral. He could already hunt for fish in open water and didn’t have the teeth he once had. However, he was still in danger of the sharks. Daring to tread out into the sea, he swam out from behind his coral refuge and readily proceeded out into open water. He was safe, no sharks were near him. He could see for miles out into the ocean and if a shark came near, it would be noticed long before it ever reached Culdo. He felt confident about himself in the sea, and swam on even further and deeper. The waters got darker and darker as he advanced into the depths.

He sensed a presence nearby and turned to see what it was. He could see nothing. However, he knew that something was not quite right. Cautiously, he glided through the waters, careful of any unseen predators. Suddenly, he felt a wave of water and he just ducked away in time to miss the deadly bite of a shark. It turned around to face Culdo. It was the biggest shark he had ever seen. Culdo was too afraid to move, even though instinct told him that he should swim as fast as he could out of the vicinity. The shark swam forward, jaws wide open, ready to swallow Culdo whole. However, the bite never happened. The shark turned abruptly and swam off into the gloom. Surprised, Culdo turned to see what had eluded the shark. His eyes grew wide with fear when he saw what swam right behind him.

A gargantuan creature, ten times bigger than any shark he had ever encountered loomed behind him. It was Liopleurodon, the biggest carnivore the planet had ever seen. Its interlocking, tusk-like teeth came towards him. Just as Culdo was about to turn away he saw the jaws open, large enough to swallow three Opthalmosaurus. Culdo swam for his life faster than he had ever swum before. The monstrous jaws of the Liopleurodon swam just as fast. Culdo knew he would be eaten, but any attempt to escape the open mouth was better than nothing. Culdo was just brushing the front teeth of Liopleurodon when suddenly it turned away. Another Liopleurodon had arrived, and a territorial dispute had emerged. Seizing his chance, Culdo sped away from the scene. He was once again in safety.

The open sea was a dangerous place, Culdo had found out. But he would live just the same as his ancestors did before him, and he swam off into the distance.

The End