User:Mkdw/Vancouverite

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This is an essay. It is not a policy or guideline; it merely reflects some opinions of its author(s). Please update the page as needed, or discuss it on the talk page.

You know you're a Vancouverite when.... by Mkdwtalk

1. You know the mountains are located north. In fact, you use them to get your bearing when lost.

2. Checking the weather means looking out the window.

3. Your car’s A/C is left on all the time, even in winter.

4. A nice day means its not raining no matter how cold or cloudy it is. A beautiful day means you can see the mountains.

5. The sound of the 9 o'Clock Gun doesn’t startle you.

6. You know that West Vancouver, the West End, and the West Side are different places.

7. You know more people who have cabins in Whistler than cabins anywhere else.

8. You hate the Calgary Flames, but not as much as the Toronto Maple Leafs.

9. You pay more for a litre of bottled water than a litre of gas.

10. You know what the acronyms NDP, GVRD, CFL, NHL, VPL, BC, UBC, SFU, VSB, BCAA, ICBC. PNE, CBC and CTV mean.

11. You consider anything below 5 degrees to be freezing.

12. However, you consider 20 degrees and above ‘roasting’.

13. You’ll accept American money with out hesitation.

14. A full day is going to IKEA.

15. You think it’s weird not to have a cell phone, but even stranger, one with out a camera.

16. You know five good and cheap places to eat with in walking distance right off the top of your head.

17. Deciding where to eat is a matter of deciding what type of food you’re in the mood for: Japanese, Chinese, Mexican, Italian, etc.

18. You know where the two Starbucks corner is downtown.

19. The thought of a Starbucks in the washroom of a Starbucks makes you laugh.

20. You still consider Tim Hortons an interior and east coast concept.

21. You know more people who smoke marijuana than have their class 5 drivers’ license.

22. You know what 4/20 means and the Art Gallery in relation.

23. You can name all the universities in Vancouver but not all the colleges.

24. It snows your trash isn’t picked up and your garbage trucks turn into salt trucks.

25. You know all the T.V. shows and movies filmed in Vancouver.

26. You know that Vancouver is sometimes called Hollywood North.

27. The whole city shuts down over less than a foot of snow.

28. You know many jokes about Slurry… Surrey.

29. You’ll always refer to ‘The Telus World of Science’ as ‘Science World’.

30. You consider the 778 area code to be lesser than the 604.

31. The concept of skiing, golfing, and sailing in the same day does not seem impossible to you.

32. You feel guilty about throwing aluminum cans in the garbage.

33. The Canada Line on Cambie makes no sense to you.

34. You can pronounce Tsawwassen, Squamish, Osoyoos, Ucluelet, Esquimalt, Sooke, and Nanaimo.

35. You know a California Roll is a type of sushi.

36. You despise the B.C. Ferries and Translink.

37. You chuckle when you say the word ‘fast ferries’.

38. Not being able to drink the tap water is a major hassle.

39. You know the Vancouver Canucks started the ‘white towel’ trend in sports.

40. You assume you’ll pay more than $25 for a cab ride no matter where you’re going.

41. Rent and housing prices make you cringe.

42. Tourism, the Port of Vancouver, fishing, and forestry related businesses are Vancouver’s four main industries -- next to grow ops.

43. You know people who are legally adults but can only drive with one passenger in the car and a 0.0 blood alcohol level.

44. You know there’s a town called Dawson Creek.

45. You know the name of one homeless or crazy person on a first name basis.

46. You know the Canucks have never won the Stanley Cup.

47. Your only memory of AOL is playing Frisbee with a garbage can.

48. You’ve been lost in Richmond because you thought making two right turns would get you back on to the main road.

49. You know that Vancouver Island is not in Vancouver.

50. You plan to go skiing or snowboarding after work / school.

51. You never go camping with out waterproof matches and waterproof clothing.

52. Any Canadian that doesn’t talk like you is just considered ‘East Coast’.

53. You know which mountains are involved in the 2010 Winter Olympics.

54. You have an unbendable faith that cars will always stop when you cross the street.

55. You did not know Vancouver is also the name of a city in Clark County, Washington State.

56. Hal Johnson and Joanne McLeod had more influence on your daily life than Vladimir Putin.

57. You consider all B.C. beer to be local.

58. You know three or more people involved in some sort car accident that was their fault.

59. You’re surprised to see only one car turn left on a yellow light.

60. Cars that don’t turn right on red lights make you upset.

61. You say you’ll only be 5 minutes but really mean 15.

62. Your idea of a hic is someone from Vancouver Island.

63. Going through a car wash is the most magical part of your day.

64. You have several public transit stories involving: drunks, crazy people, and teenagers.

65. A yellow light means keep going and a red light means three more cars.

66. Finding parking takes longer than it did to drive there.

67. You know what ‘The Big One’ means.

68. If you hear someone is doing the Grind, you know they’re not hitting the books.

69. You know all the words to Bryan Adam's Summer of '69.

70. You also know that in 1969 Bryan Adams was 11, and that the Summer of '69 isn't about 1969.

71. You boycott at least one store or brand name.

72. The gym is always packed at 3:00pm on a working day.

73. You consider that if it has no snow, it’s not a ‘real’ mountain.

74. In winter, you go to work in the dark and come home in the dark.

75. You have no concept of humidity without precipitation.

76. You have actually used your mountain bike on a mountain.

77. The cars in the student parking lot are way nicer than the cars in the staff parking lot.

78. Lululemon is not just a clothing brand but a way of life. (for girls and, probably should be less, guys)

79. A one hour parking spot equals minimum wage.

80. You know a grande is a medium.

81. You can read a decent size novel before being admitted into the hospital.

82. You know that the beach increases in size by nearly a kilometer at low tide.

83. Yes, you know there is an accident on the: Port Mann Bridge, Mary Hill Bypass, and Oak / Knight Street Bridge.

84. Someone mentions 'Swedish Twins' you don't think about pornography.

85. You basically hate every myTelus, BC Ferry, Yellow Cab, and TransLink automated voice.

86. It snows, schools close, International airport has hour long delays, nobody makes it to work, but the slopes are packed.

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