User:Michael Kenya Davis
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[edit] Background
Michael "Kenya" Davis is a student in UCD, Ireland. He lives in Merville the on campus accommodation site. He enjoys fencing, computers, hentai, Japanese music and drawing cartoon characters (Outburst Man-who is based on himself). Kenya lives with the illustrious, bodacious and unflinching Emmet O Brien, the aberrant, ardent and indomitable Eoin Fives and the prestigious,able-bodied and wholesome Adrian Gilbane but prefers to befriend the fencing crew such as Thealonious Cakemaker. A video of Kenya playing the spoon game can be watched at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4tLQHcsgF9k and his bebo page is at http://www.bebo.com/mikenyan
[edit] Songs
Kenya's favourite song is Ah-Ha's rendition of "Take on Me".He likes to sing his tune often, usually when he is cooking or showering. During his time in Rockwell College in Tipperary Kenya had a song composed about himself by his close friends and housemates. It went like this...
"Michael Davis has a penis and he likes it,
Michael Davis has a penis and he likes it,
Michael Davis has a penis,
Penis Michael has a davis,
Michael Davis has a penis and he likes it,
And he sometimes loves it tooooo much!"
by Usman Iqbal.
This song relates to Kenya's compulsive masterbation disorder (CMD), legend has it that his housemates were spurred into writing this lyrical piece after another sleepless night due to Kenyas self-pleasuring. Kenya's CMD was also noticed by his UCD housemates and earned him the nickname "THE BULL" as he makes a rhymtmic grunting noise while he masterbates!
[edit] Sport
Kenya who originally hails from Nairobi has recently risen up in the ranks of international fencing. He is heavily tipped to eclipse all the former African greats in this sport and take the game by storm. As mentioned above previously Kenya partook in "The Spoon Game" often with unfavourable results on his behalf.
[edit] Relationships
Kenya is highly noted for his love of threesomes, according to himself "I've had my fair share of threesomes back home, two or three". Although there is no reason to doubt this, Kenya's recent scoring record has but this statement in to serious disrepute and it cannot be verified.
His latest conquest was with an Indian girl called Neilifer, whom he courted on a holiday to Kenya during the Christmas period. Upon asking Kenya what sexual favour he received off her he replied "fingers".
Kenya told his housemates in UCD how he has enjoyed sex on a trampoline in Ireland, but it appears he got confused while telling the story for the second time saying it happened in Kenya!
While in UCD Kenya was rumoured to have had a homosexual relationship with the extremely frolicsome and homoerotic Nicholas Newport who is allegedly the only gay of Ballycogley townsland. Although later this was proven to be fictitious.
[edit] Chat up Lines
"Do you believe in love at first sight or shall I walk past again"
"I'm an organ donor, and I have an organ you might need"
"If you and I were squirrels, could I bust a nut in your hole?"
"Excuse me, but I think I dropped something!!! MY JAW!!"
"Do you sleep on your stomach? Can I?"
"Is that a mirror in your pants because I can see myself in them."
"Is it hot in here or is it just you?"
"Is your name Gillette? ...because you're the best a man can get."
"Have you ever kissed a rabbit between the ears?(Kenya pulls his pockets inside out....) Would u like to?"
"If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put U and I together"
"I may not be Fred Flinstone, but I sure can make your bed rock."
"Fuck me if I'm wrong, but haven't we met before?"
[edit] Quotes
(When Kenya was in his underwear) "Theres never been so much man in one room"
"I have an enormous capacity for drinking alcoholic beverages"
(On asking Kenya whos penis was bigger, after he caught his parents having sex) "Like Father, like son!"
"I've had these bulging hulk shoulders since I was eight years old"
"5s ur out of control"
(When Kenya got intoxicated and argued with his housemates) "Be QUIET i'm trying to talk"
"Irish-born, Kenyan-bred, strong in the arm and thick in the head"
"Yes, it's where I'm from, and no, I'm not black. Apparently that's actually possible. Who knew?"
"Fencing. It changed my life. It's that awesome"
