Michael Kelso
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| Michael Kelso | |
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| First appearance | "That '70s Pilot" |
| Last appearance | "That '70s Finale" |
| Information | |
| Nickname(s) | Kelso, Mike, Kelslow, Idiot, The King, Patchy, Tater Nuts, Jughead, Mister Crap Shoes, Big Chief Brown Bottom, Mr. Clip-On, Don Juan el Tardo |
| Gender | Male |
| Age | 18-21 |
| Date of birth | September 15, 1958 |
| Occupation | Student, Male Underwear Model, Assistant Chef, Waiter, Police officer, Security guard |
| Family | John Kelso (Father)
Victoria Kelso (Mother) Casey Kelso (Brother) |
| Spouse(s) | Brooke |
| Children | Bethany (Betsy) Victoria Kelso |
| Address | Point Place, WI and Chicago, IL |
Michael Giovani Kelso (played by Ashton Kutcher) (born September 15, 1958) is a character from That '70s Show. Tall, lanky and long-haired, he is the dim-witted pretty-boy of the group, coasting through life on his good looks. His behavior is very much in line with a stereotypical oversexed lunkhead or himbo (male-bimbo). He spends most of the series in a mutually parasitic relationship with the equally vapid Jackie Burkhart, whom he continues to obsess over following their numerous breakups. In spite of his immaturity, Kelso was shown on several occasions not to be stupid, simply unmotivated; when he was either forced to or chose to, Kelso displayed startling intelligence unbecoming of his usual personality or hijinks. Near the end of the series, Kelso became one of the first characters to completely break away from adolescence and into adulthood when he impregnated a girl with whom he had a one-night-stand; to his friends' surprise, Kelso took responsibility for the child, moving to Chicago to take a job to support and be near his newborn daughter.
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[edit] Personality
Apart from being unintelligent, Kelso has also been known to be quite sensitive. In one episode, when he started wearing a leather jacket, his friends started to make fun of him for looking like the Fonz from Happy Days and he kept sulking every time someone brought up this supposed similarity. This trait was also shown after an off-screen accident with mashed potatoes in the school cafeteria, leading to the nickname "Tater Nuts," which he greatly despised.
Kelso failed the first grade for his refusal to write in cursive (and also an incident where he "might have" killed the class bunny) [1] and lied about his age ever since. On a trip to potential colleges, he said he had been dropped on his head as a child. In the third season premiere, "Reefer Madness," Kelso was shown in a flashback as a 13-year-old, stating that he's lost all interest in school and academic aspirations, suggesting that he wasn't always as dumb as he often appears to be. However, in an even earlier flashback, it shows him as a young boy who greets the Formans with no pants, since he forgot to put them on, contradicting the earlier flashback that showed him as a smart geek when he was a child. Because he has kept his real age a secret from the rest of the gang, everyone holds a grudge against Kelso because he did not use his age to their advantage and buy them beer.
Kelso enjoys a good "burn," a painful humiliation to someone. Although he screams "Burn!" a lot, Kelso himself rarely burns anyone, generally because a burn requires a cleverness that is beyond Kelso's limited mind. Also Kelso is known to be very unfaithful in relationships, thinking one girl isn't enough, a lot of his advice on relationships is to get 2 girlfriends. He has been caught cheating by Jackie 2 times, once hearing about it and secondly seeing it herself, watching him kiss Laurie (even though at the time he was leaving her for Jackie).
Kelso's interests include drinking beer, watching Christmas cartoons, playing with Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots, wrestling with dogs, playing Atari Pong, buying toy dinosaurs, and dreaming of being a spaceman, but above all, he seems to enjoy smoking marijuana. Kelso also engages in incredibly stupid activities of his own design, such as skiing off the tops of moving cars, and sliding down a rocky hill in a canoe. He seems to have an affinity for falling off the town water tower, at one point claiming to have fallen in "every grade," and even does so on purpose in the series finale. He has suffered all sorts of consequences for his idiocy, ranging from gluing his hand to the Formans' fridge to burning himself while underwater, but by dumb luck, he manages to avoid being seriously injured or killed.
Kelso accidentally shot Eric Forman's pet hamster, Snowball, with a BB gun. Later, he nearly shot Steven Hyde and missed by inches, but Hyde led Kelso to believe that Kelso had actually shot him in the eye. There is also one time in which Hyde shoots Kelso in the leg. As a running gag in the series, whenever Hyde and Kelso engage in a fight, it usually ends with Hyde "supposedly injuring" one of Kelso's eyes, prompting him to shout "Ah, my eye!" or a variation of such. Kelso once wore a pair of ski goggles to avoid this, so Hyde just kicked him in the shin.
He is also known for giving not so smart advice to his friends, but it often turns against him, and then he always refuses to admit his own advice applies to him as well.
[edit] Intelligence
Although apparently possessing below average intelligence, Kelso is often shown to be merely unmotivated and dimwitted; he possesses a great deal of practical knowledge, which he simply fails to apply. His friends were all startled by his (comparatively) high scores on the SAT exam, and he demonstrated surprising technical insight by formulating a successful method for upgrading a Pong machine. The episode The Keg demonstrates that, when properly motivated (by either beer, money, or a combination thereof), Kelso is capable of solving complex algebra problems in his head.
[edit] Relationship with Jackie Burkhart
When the show debuted, Kelso was dating Jackie Burkhart, a popular and self-centered cheerleader. The two lost their virginity to each other after Kelso and his friends got out of jail for riding in a car that was mistaken for being stolen. Jackie gets on Kelso's friends' nerves on a daily basis and Kelso repeatedly said that he was going to break up with her. However, Jackie beat him to it and broke up with him after catching him kissing Pam Macy, only to get back together in the very same episode. Jackie later broke up with Kelso again after a pregnancy scare, but they got back together later at the Junior Prom.
In Season 2, Kelso began an affair with Eric's promiscuous sister, Laurie, about which Jackie eventually found out and subsequently broke up with him again. Kelso then continued to date Laurie, until later in Season 3 when he found out Laurie had cheated on him. Soon after, Jackie decided to test Kelso to see if they should get back together, which they did. Kelso remained loyal to Jackie after that and stayed with her throughout Season 4. However, after Kelso had neglected Jackie by joining a modeling agency, Eric caught her kissing her boss, and held it over her head. Kelso eventually found out, and went to ambush Jackie's boss, not knowing he was a blackbelt. Kelso is beaten up by Jackie's boss, and he is angry at her for a while, until she tells him to find out why he cheated. She says she cheated because she was neglected. Kelso finds out he cheated because Jackie always insulted him and made him feel bad about himself, and broke up with her because she felt he couldn't be with someone who made him feel like that. The break up didn't last, as they got back together shortly after.
In the Season 4 finale, Jackie asked Kelso to marry her, but Kelso became nervous and left for California with Donna. When he returned in the beginning of Season 5 he found out that Jackie had moved onto Hyde, which made him extremely jealous, and he spent the majority of the season trying to get her back. However, by the beginning of Season 6, Kelso had claimed to be over Jackie and was fine with just being friends with her. At the end of Season 7 however, Kelso drives Jackie to Chicago after her break-up with Hyde, and they nearly have sex together, but Hyde showed up and Kelso ran off.
In Season 8, he claimed he still loved Jackie and considered marrying her before he was offered a job in Chicago. By that time, Fez had already told Jackie about his proposal, which made him feel he should do so, but she eventually turned him down, which led to just friendship between the two of them for the rest of the show.
[edit] Other
It is clear from Jackie and Kelso's relationship that Kelso definitely is not the one wearing the pants in his relationships; he is easily manipulated (Laurie pointed this out once and called him a "tool") and never fulfills his promise of breaking up with his girlfriend, although later it may simply be because he is afraid to break a woman's heart. When he dates Annette in Season 5, he even remarked "It's good to be under someone's thumb again!" with a grin, suggesting he prefers his women to be controlling.
In the Season 6 opener, it is revealed that Kelso is allergic to eggs - right after he downs a glass of raw eggs. Also, in that same season, Kelso became the illegitimate father of a baby girl, Betsy (born Bethany Victoria Kelso, named after his grandmother's first name and mother's middle name), who was conceived in a bathroom at a Molly Hatchet concert.
Kelso became a policeman, albeit a bumbling one. He attempted to take his job seriously by growing a mustache and calling himself "Mike," and even going as far as flushing Hyde's marijuana stash down the toilet, but he was quickly reverted when Hyde and Fez cut his mustache and made him resemble Adolf Hitler. He eventually set the police academy on fire via a flare gun, and even before then, broke into the academy and lost his supervisor's squad car. Consequently, Kelso is kicked off the force, prompting him to accept a job as a security guard for a Chicago-based playboy bunny-like club from a sleazy owner. Michael Kelso showed up for the series finale of "That '70s Show," which aired Thursday, May 18, 2006. He joined Fez and Hyde in the water tower and was tricked into jumping off the tower as was done in previous episodes. He explained to them that he felt he had to come back: "It's like the turn of the century, man!"
Kelso often remarks that he has an entire future planned out for him. He says this several times in the third and fourth season. This was apparently a way to convince others he was mature, but his friends viewed it as boastful and annoying. Kelso's only plan was to get through life on his good looks, and when he believes this might not happen, he greatly over-reacts.
[edit] Family
Kelso's maternal grandmother's name is Bethany, after whom his daughter, Betsy, is named. He has an older brother, Casey Kelso, and it is known he has at least two more brothers and at least one sister, who Hyde mentions in Season 2 is fat and ugly. In the episode, "Stolen Car," Eric Forman states that Kelso's parents have seven kids. His grandmother has, in Kelso's words, "big honkin' whiskers" ((This happens in the episode Dine and Dash)although Kelso insists his mother is a "very beautiful woman," his friends imply that she, too, has such whiskers). Kelso's father, John Kelso, appeared in the episode Career Day.John Kelso's occupation is unclear, especially to his son. When Kelso gives up on trying to figure out his father's job, he states; "I'm just gonna say you're a farmer". John Kelso appears to be very intelligent, which is ironic, due to the fact his son is very dim-witted.
[edit] Attire
Michael's wardrobe consists mainly of Lacoste brand polos, plaid long-sleeved shirts, and bell-bottom pants.
[edit] Trivia
Kelso once thought that he heard his name on "Led Zeppelin II," believing that on "Whole Lotta Love," Robert Plant sung "Kelso Lotta Love."
Kelso loves popsicles, koolade, dogs, wrestling and football.
Over the course of the series, Kelso has had three cars: A Dodge van, a Volkswagen Samba Bus, and an MG convertible.
[edit] References
- ^ That 70s Show Episode 208
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