Kevin Matthews
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Kevin Matthews is a Midwest-based radio personality, best known for his 12-year association with the Loop and its onetime sister-station, AM1000. Matthews became popular for his off-kilter take on various topics. He's known for doing voices, including that of his irascible sidekick, sportscaster Jim Shorts. Strangely enough, many listeners in the early days never caught on to the fact that Shorts was a character. One of his famous bits was encouraging his listeners to yell out "Free Bird!" at various concerts, whether it was the CSO, or Barry Manilow. One infamous incidence of this was a heckler shouting Free Bird as well as the names of Matthews and Shorts at a Bill Hicks show, prompting the well-known "Hitler had the right idea" rant. [1]
During the summer of 1986, KWK-FM brought Matthews to St. Louis from WLAV in Grand Rapids, but he was fired the next year. He was hired by The Loop in March, 1987 as the weekday overnight and Sunday host. A month later, AM1000 started simulcasting The Loop, including Matthews' show. Soon thereafter, Matthews' show began broadcasting exclusively from the AM dial between Jonathon Brandmeier in the morning and Steve & Garry in the afternoon. During this era, Matthews made occasional comedy-concert appearances in the Chicago area, generally performing blue. He also promoted a line of clothing featuring himself and his characters. His fans were referred to as "Kev-Heads." During this phase of his career did he looked remarkably like the title character in Willow played by Warwick Davis. Callers were fond of telling Kevin how much they enjoyed his work in Willow.
In September, 1993, just five months after renewing his contract to continue middays on AM1000, Matthews moved back to the Loop as morning man when it switched from album rock to talk and AM1000 flipped to an all-sports format. In September 1996, he returned to AM1000 as midday host after its failed first attempt at sports-talk. In October 1997, he shifted from middays to afternoons, going up against former colleague Steve Dahl at WCKG-FM 105.9.
Eleven months later, he ended his 11-year association with AM1000 and its former sister-station, The Loop, almost immediately signing on to do mornings at 94.7 FM (now an oldies station). He lasted there until August 22, 2001, but would go on to WCKG-FM 105.9 as midday host in 2002. He remained at WCKG until 2 days before his contract expired.
Kevin Matthews spent the summer of 2005 doing weekly thirty minute internet broadcasts, during which he proclaimed Chicago radio "dead".
On September 8th, 2005, it was announced that Matthews would be returning to Grand Rapids, Michigan to be the morning show host at WLAV-FM and Director of Program Development for Citadel Communications.
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[edit] Characters Voiced by Kevin
(Discontinued characters are noted as historical.)
- Bernie (of "Bernie and Bunny") - 1940s-style sado-masochistic partner of Bunny, a character played by Dorothy Humphrey. Bernie would hit Bunny when she made a mistake ("I'll smack ya in the puss!"), and he would sometimes ask Bunny to hit him for his own gratification. (historical)
- Raymond Burr - impersonation of the actor known for his portrayal of Perry Mason. Matthews' characterization, like the actor, was gay. He was known on the show for his catchphrase "Is it wrong?", which was typically part of a longer question about the suitibility of a certain behavior or action: "Is it wrong for a man, to pat another man on the rump, in a locker room? I don't think so."
- Bill Cartwright - impersonation of gravelly-voiced former Chicago Bulls center and coach, known best for "The Bill Cartwright Christmas Album" and his failed stand-up career. (historical)
- Darnell - a character known for his sloppy diction while reading poetry and children's books, like "Mr. Happy" by Roger Hargreaves.
- Devon - urban hipster from the planet "Whatitis". During the show if a strange word came into play, Devon would claim to have a sister by that name. A producer would ask what her middle name was, and it would invariably be "Mae". When asked how she made her living, each sister had a different profession and lived in a different city (example: Chlamydia Mae sells tires in Tampa).
- Barney Fife - exaggerated portrayal of the same character from The Andy Griffith Show.
- Man from New York - Strait-laced and tight-voiced narrator of various bits who usually spoke over the sound of a scratchy record, occasionally accompanied by film stip beeps.
- Phil McCracken - Cowboy soundalike, used primarily during crank calls.
- Fred Rogers - an iconoclastic exaggeration of the popular host of the PBS children's show.
- Jim Shorts - Kevin's primary alter ego and his abusive and abused sports anchor. The Jim Shorts character also voiced several characters himself, including Cecil, the Angry Guy.
- Bob Steelballs - Host of "Pillow Talk" and radio consultant.
- Officer Squarenuts - Used primarily during crank calls.
- Uncle Remus - Host of "Gravy Talk", a segment of the show about BBQ. Known for his catchphrase, "Hmmmm! Sho' is good!", exclaimed with generous echo.
- Eddie - XXX-sized lead singer of Ed Zeppelin, who performed parody songs such as "Nights at White Castle," "I Could Eat Eggrolls Forever" ("Strawberry Fields Forever"), and "Fastfood Restaurant" ("Baba O'Riley"). Based on Chicago DJ Ed Schwartz. (historical)
- The Out-of-Sync Man - A parody of the actors in old Bruce Lee and Godzilla movies whose lines have been dubbed into English such that their lip movements do not match the dialogue of the soundtrack. This character was reportedly the one of Kevin's many "personalities" that drove former newscaster Laura Witek to leave the show.
- Gordon Weasel - Host of "The Shrub Club" who usually ended up injuring himself during his horticulture talk show. Named after the then-infamous "Garden Weasel" gardening tool advertised on TV.
[edit] Characters Voiced by Contributors
(Discontinued characters are noted as historical.)
- Earl - antique shop proprietor in Antioch, Illinois who is married, but has implied his homosexual tendencies on the air. He has his own theme music "Earl's Theme" that plays while he's talking to Kevin, or whenever the boundary of homosexuality is approached. (historical)
- Jerome - Strong African-American presence on the show, used to test the limits of race-relations. Kevin once had Jerome walk around Chicago's affluent North Shore communities with a television to see how long it took the police to question him. (historical)
- Harry - exaggerated impersonation of Harry Caray done by Jim Volkman, done prior to and after the announcer's death. (historical)
- Kathy - Kevin's number-one fan, based on Kathy Bates' portrayal of Annie Wilkes, who holds her favorite author captive in the 1990 thriller Misery, which was based on the novel of the same name by Stephen King. In order to quit her habit of Kevin, she was given the post-hypnotic suggestion to bark like a dog every time she heard his name. This only resulted in a lot of barking. (historical)
- Brian McCann - Chicago's former number-one male prostitute, the "Naughty Kitty". Brian is now a writer for Conan O'Brien, and can be seen in many of the show's segments. (historical)
- Scott May and His One Armed Orchestra-Musical accompanist and punching bag for Kev. Writer and Performer of "Earl's Theme". Now organist for The Ides Of March
- Virginia Middleton - one of Jim Shorts' many former syndicators, characterized as an old woman.
- Glen Shorts - Jim Shorts' brother, a pyromaniac.
- Lugar Shorts - Jim Shorts' son by Wang who has a tail.
- Wang - Swiss/Vietnamese love-interest of Jim Shorts' who was accidentally inseminated by him while they were swimming. She speaks only Vietnamese, and Jim only English, but somehow they understand each other.
[edit] Games and Bits
- The Apartment Game
- The Hi Game -- calling a person at random and saying nothing but "Hi!" repeatedly
- Video Time with Da Gov
- Animal Stories (an Homage to Larry Lujack)
- Homeless Theater
- Your Can't Win
- Bait Your Mate
- Bitch-Bastard -- couples are allowed to have their arguments on the air
- Cereal Killers -- guessing which cereal Jim Shorts is eating
- Conference Calls -- Kevin conference calls two random parties, making them think a glitch at the phone company made their phone lines call each other
- Cop/No Cop -- calling Dunkin' Donuts and asking if a cop is present; a listener guesses before the call whether a cop will be present
- Dick/No Dick -- same thing as Cop/No Cop except Kevin calls a "Dick's" business (Towing, etc.) and asks if Dick is in
- Eating with Elvis
- Lunchtime Sabotage
- Public Address Calls
- Radio Tradio
- Stump Jim
- Dead or Alive
[edit] Common Show Sayings
(The speaker of these sayings is indicated parenthetically)
- Boneload (Jim Shorts)
- Boy I'd Like Ta! (Jim Shorts; indicates his sexual desire)
- Hate You, Hate Your Show. (callers)
- Gooped up on gop (Jim Shorts; his description of drug dependency)
- Icky bad (Jim Shorts; how he perceives sexual relations)
- Is It Wrong? (Raymond Burr character; Usually in response to a homosexual double entendre)
- Jackload (Jim Shorts)
- Lip dipper (Jim Shorts)
- Show's Over At 2:30. (Jim Shorts)
- Stuttering prick (Jim Shorts)
- Suck jacker (Jim Shorts)
- Swing Baby! (Kevin Matthews)
- That's good (Jim Shorts)
- What A Train Wreck! (Kevin Matthews)
- What Are You Goofy? (Kevin Matthews/Jim Shorts)
- Ya Nut! (Kevin Matthews/Jim Shorts)
- Yessssss. (Raymond Burr character; Usually in response to a homosexual double entendre)
- You're An Idiot! (Kevin Matthews/Jim Shorts)
- "I've Gotta Sister Named..." (Devon)
- When a strange phrase (usually double-entendre) is mentioned, Kev would say "I was in a band called..." A co-host would say "What did you play", to which he'd say that they were a cover band for some ancient rock band. Co host would then say "Where did you play" and Kev would mention a local Chicagoland club. Example, starting with news:
"...who then got caught in a bag of sticky nuts" "I was in a band called Sticky Nuts" "Oh yeah, what did you play?" "We were an Asia cover band" "Where did you play" "The Thirsty Whale"
[edit] Bears Banners
Kevin arranged for planes to fly over Soldier Field during Bears games with a banner trailing for the fans (and players/media/management) to read. The following are just examples:
- BEARS PACK IN POOPER
- BEAT ANY PACKERS LATELY?
- BRING BACK DITKA!
- BRING BACK WALTER!
- COWBOYS SLEEP IN THE SAME BED!
- MCCASKEY IS A BEAN COUNTING TIGHTWAD
- HOW BOUT THEM CUBS?
- HOW MUCH WERE THOSE SEATS?
- MAYBE NEXT YEAR, PROBABLY NOT.
- MT CARMEL 42, BEARS 0
- PAPA BEAR MUST BE PROUD.
- PRO FOOTBALL? YEAH RIGHT.
- QB TRYOUTS AFTER THE GAME.
- THE BEARS BLOW ASS.
- THE TOILET BOWL SHUFFLE???
- WANT SOME FRIES WITH THAT LOSS?
[edit] Former cast and crew
- Dave Aurelio (1997, technical producer)
- Maggie Brock (1990, news)
- Susan Catanese (executive producer; known on the air as "Duji")
- Cara Carriveau (1994-95, news)
- Mark DeYoung (executive producer; known on the air as "Shemp")
- Laurie Githens (1989, news)
- Dorothy Humphrey (1989-1998, traffic; several stints)
- Peggy Kusinski (1995-97, news)
- Lars Larsen (1997, technical producer; left to join morning show at WZNX-FM)
- Gunnar Malstrom (2001, 2002 associate producer; known on air as "Gunnar the intern")
- Steve McEwen (sports reporter known on the air as "The Dog-Face Boy")
- Scott McKay (traffic; known as "Mo Driver" on the air)
- John Myron (executive producer; known on the air as "Pugsly" or "Pugs")
- AJ Parker (1998, news)
- Lorna Phillips (1998, news)
- Mitch Rosen (exec. prod., later program director; known as "Chunga" and the character "Herb Katzenberg" on the air)
- Cordell Simpson (1989-1997, producer; known on the air as "Doc")
- Wendy Snyder (1992-93, news)
- Geli Sulkowski (executive producer)
- Jennifer Stephens (news)
- Jim Toth (2002-2003, known as "Lumpy")
- Scott Trunda (1997, technical producer; known as "Spooner" on the air; left to host a morning show in Iowa)
- Kathy Voltmer (1993-94, news)
- Laura Witek (1990-92, news)
- Derrick Philips (1997-2007, webmaster; on-air contributor)
[edit] Television and Film
In the early '90s, Matthews appeared as a contestant in a special edition of Win, Lose or Draw in which all the contestants were Chicago radio and television personalities. In 1994, Matthews appeared as a surfer in an episode of "Baywatch" entitled "I Spike". That same year, Matthews' alter-ego, Jim Shorts began hosting a show on the Chicago's SportsChannel America affiliate called "The Jim Shorts Cavalcade of Sports (For You). The show was a send-up of sports clip shows, in which Jim had to recreate the plays with video games because -- as he claimed -- he couldn't get the rights to the footage. The show also featured notable guests, such as Johnny Kerr, but Kevin, as Kevin, didn't appear on this show during its run from 1994-1996. The same year this show launched, Matthews made a cameo appearance in the movie, Blink, during the scene on the train.
