Gregg Easterbrook

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Gregg Edmund Easterbrook is an American writer and a senior editor of The New Republic. His articles have appeared in Slate, The Atlantic Monthly, The New York Times, The Washington Post, The Los Angeles Times, Wired, and Beliefnet. In addition, he is a fellow at the Brookings Institution, a Washington, D.C. think tank. During the National Football League season, Easterbrook writes a column called Tuesday Morning Quarterback, currently on ESPN.com.

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[edit] Early life

Easterbrook was born in 1953 and grew up in Buffalo, New York. Easterbrook has a bachelor's degree in political science from Colorado College and a master's in journalism from Northwestern University. He is married and has three children; two boys, born in 1989 and 1995, and a girl born in 1990. He is the brother of Judge Frank H. Easterbrook and Neil Easterbrook, English professor at Texas Christian University.

[edit] Career

Easterbrook has been a long time critic of the Space Shuttle program, publishing an extensive criticism in 1980 in the Washington Monthly. Following the Challenger and Columbia disasters Easterbrook received attention for his belief that the shuttle program should be canceled and replaced with a "modern system that would make space flight cheaper and safer." [1]

In addition to his journalism, Easterbrook has published several books. His latest, The Progress Paradox: How Life Gets Better While People Feel Worse, was published in December 2003. The book focuses on statistical data indicating that Americans are better off in terms of material goods and amount of free time available but surveys show that they are not happier than before. Easterbrook argues that this has occurred due to choice anxiety and abundance denial.

Easterbrook has also written books on Christian theology, American football, and the environment, along with two novels. Some of his works include The Here and Now, Tuesday Morning Quarterback, Beside Still Waters, A Moment on the Earth, and This Magic Moment.

Easterbrook wrote multiple stories arguing that global warming was not happening, or at least that it was not a manmade problem. In 2006, he reversed that stance, writing that scientists nearly unanimously accept the evidence of an artificial greenhouse effect and that greenhouse gas emissions must be curbed.[2]

[edit] Kill Bill controversy

Easterbrook also had a blog [3] at The New Republic Online, until mid-2004. In October of 2003, in a column critical of what he considered to be the senseless violence in the Quentin Tarantino film Kill Bill, Easterbrook wrote the following:

Set aside what it says about Hollywood that today even Disney thinks what the public needs is ever-more-graphic depictions of killing the innocent as cool amusement. Disney's CEO, Michael Eisner, is Jewish; the chief of Miramax, Harvey Weinstein, is Jewish. Yes, there are plenty of Christian and other Hollywood executives who worship money above all else, promoting for profit the adulation of violence. Does that make it right for Jewish executives to worship money above all else, by promoting for profit the adulation of violence? Recent European history alone ought to cause Jewish executives to experience second thoughts about glorifying the killing of the helpless as a fun lifestyle choice.

This caused an uproar and accusations that Easterbrook and The New Republic were anti-semitic. Easterbrook wrote that he "mangled" his own ideas by his choice of words and wrote the following to explain his thought process and to apologize:[4]

Twenty minutes after I pressed "send," the entire world had read it. When I reread my own words and beheld how I'd written things that could be misunderstood, I felt awful. To anyone who was offended I offer my apology, because offense was not my intent. But it was 20 minutes later, and already the whole world had seen it... My attempt to connect my perfectly justified horror at an ugly and corrupting movie to the religious faith and ethnic identity of certain executives was hopelessly clumsy...accusing a Christian of adoring money above all else does not engage any history of ugly stereotypes. Accuse a Jewish person of this and you invoke a thousand years of stereotypes about that which Jews have specific historical reasons to fear. What I wrote here was simply wrong, and for being wrong, I apologize.

He further explained that he worships in one of the handful of joint Christian-Jewish congregations in the United States. He had previously written in a column that "One of the shortcomings of Christianity is that most adherents downplay the faith's interweaving with Judaism" and indicated that he and his family sought out a place where Christians and Jews express their faith cooperatively. The New Republic accepted blame for the piece in an apology [5] and denied that his comments were intentionally anti-semitic. Easterbrook continued to blog for them, and still writes articles on environmentalism (especially the damage caused by sport utility vehicles), religion and other subjects.

[edit] Tuesday Morning Quarterback

At the time of the Kill Bill controversy, Easterbrook's Tuesday Morning Quarterback column was appearing on the website of ESPN, which is owned by Disney. ESPN fired Easterbrook after his comments were published but after he delivered his apology, he resumed the Tuesday Morning Quarterback column, temporarily for two weeks on the independent website Football Outsiders, and then more permanently for NFL.com.

The column is noted for its length (it often runs over 15 pages in printed form). Easterbrook commonly includes a "Running Items Department", football haiku and senryu, "Cheerbabe Cheesecake" and "Equal-Time Beefcake", "obscure college-football scores" including his obsession with Indiana of Pennsylvania and California of Pennsylvania, and refers to teams by humorous nicknames or "cognomen", such as "Potomac Drainage Basin Indigenous Persons" (Washington Redskins) and "Arizona CAUTION: MAY CONTAIN FOOTBALL-LIKE SUBSTANCE Cardinals". He also guarantees "All Predictions Wrong or Your Money Back." Of course, the column is free so, as he always points out, there is nothing to be refunded.

General themes which recur in the column include

  • An emphasis on solid football fundamentals as opposed to what Easterbrook considers an overemphasis on flashy but risky and often foolish plays designed to obtain greater media coverage,
  • Bemoaning the tendency of teams to pass instead of run the football,
  • Obsessive analysis of coaching strategy and various excellent or atrocious plays and games.
  • Contending that most successful plays are usually the product of good offensive or defensive line play rather than the prowess of any individual quarterback, running back or wide receiver.
  • Criticizing the overuse of the blitz
  • General tirades on coaches punting or kicking field goals instead of trying for first downs or touchdowns, which he mocks as "cowardly".
  • Mockery of most coaches in general, except for Bill Belichick with whom he has a conflicted relationship due to his brilliant coaching yet recent ethical lapses.
  • Mockery of various publicity stunts and other public actions from individuals in the football world whom he considers foolish.
  • A continuing tirade against the NFL Sunday Ticket product available only through DirectTV, which he considers an illegal monopoly and an example of a for-profit corporation taking advantage of municipal taxpayers who fund NFL stadium construction.
  • Advocates a "no punting" strategy on 4th down plays, citing the odds of a successful conversion vs. turning the ball over to the opponent, and bemoaning coaches who don't take the risk.

Easterbrook also espouses certain football superstitions attributed to a "pantheon" of "football gods" which bestows victory upon the team with the least warmly dressed coach, the most sportsmanlike conduct, the most spirited play, or the most provocatively dressed cheerleaders.

Also, the column is known for randomly and haphazardly placed items and rants on various topics on politics, science fiction, actual science, and various television, film, and pop culture items. Photographs and captions accompany the columns which are often designed to be ridiculously humorous metaphors or caricatures of various persons or items mentioned in the column.

On April 24, 2006, it was announced that Easterbrook would be brought back to ESPN's website after a two-year absence. His return column, a preview of the 2006 NFL Draft, appeared the following day.

Easterbook's column has been highly critical of Bill Belichick with relation to the "Spygate" controversy, calling for Belichick's permanent banning from the league. Easterbrook's response to Spygate was subtly criticized by his fellow "Page Two" columnist and New England Patriots fan Bill Simmons. http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=simmons/080522 "If you have a national column in which you're excoriating a sports team for cheating even though it already paid a severe penalty for what it did, and you're hinting more revelations are coming down the road, and then it's proven you were barking up the wrong tree ... you need to admit defeat and quit blowing the situation out of proportion. No, really."

[edit] "TMQ" Team Nicknames

Team Nickname(s) Explanation
Arizona Cardinals Arizona of Mexico Cardinals
Arizona Cactus Wrens

Arizona (CAUTION: MAY CONTAIN FOOTBALL-LIKE SUBSTANCE) Cardinals

 During the 2005 season Arizona played a "home" game in Mexico City, drawing far more spectators than the team typically managed to in Arizona. The cactus wren is the official state bird of Arizona. Also, Arizona is an historically poor performer in the NFL.
Atlanta Falcons Atlanta Typos The Atlanta uniforms resemble errant smudges on a printing run.
Baltimore Ravens The Nevermores Edgar Allan Poe was a famous resident of Baltimore and his poem "The Raven" was the inspiration for the team's name. The poem is well-known for its repeated use of the word "nevermore".
Buffalo Bills The Ivies The Bills General Manager, Marv Levy, received his Master's degree in English from Harvard University in 1951. Dick Jauron, the Bills head coach, graduated with a bachelor's degree in history from Yale University in 1973.
Chicago Bears Ming Ding Xiong Mandarin for "bears whose outcomes are decided by fate". Their recent successful seasons had several games won on "lucky" plays, or decided by fate.
Cincinnati Bengals Cincinnati Tootsie-Rolls

Cincinnati Trick or Treats

 The black and orange uniforms resemble a tootsie roll wrapper. Black and orange are typically the dominant colors of Halloween decor.
Cleveland Browns Cleveland Browns (Release 3.0b)
(also Cleveland Oranges, Release 3.0b)		 Originally nicknamed "Release 2.0" when Cleveland first regained its NFL franchise, the version number was incremented when Romeo Crennel became head coach. The Cleveland Browns also wore all-orange uniforms from time to time, leading to the Oranges nickname, however they no longer wear the orange jerseys. The name is also a dig to the fairly drastic reorganizations and retooling of the Cleveland roster over recent years.
Detroit Lions Detroit Peugeots

The Cowardly Lions
Detroit Edsels

 The lion logo resembles the logo of the Peugeot Motor Company, which is ironic because the team is owned by the Ford family. Also a dig at the Lions' usual level of play, which tends to rival that of the Arizona Cardinals. Also, a reference to their tendency to punt on fourth downs as opposed to trying to achieve a first down, a move which Easterbrook detests.
Denver Broncos Denver Cursors The Broncos' uniform contains a bright orange stripe, described as a cursor when viewed on TV [6].
Houston Texans The Moo Cows The team's logo is essentially a stylized cow.
Indianapolis Colts The Lucky Charms The horseshoe logo resembles a marshmallow shape from Lucky Charms cereal.
Kansas City Chiefs The Flintstones The stone arrowhead logo resembles carved, stone age items seen in the cartoon.
Miami Dolphins Marine Mammals Though the Dolphins are often referred to as "the fish", dolphins are actually mammals.
Minnesota Vikings Hyperboreans The Hyperboreans were a mythical barbaric people in Greek mythology. Today the term can be used for any people who live in a cold climate, as the Vikings did.
New England Patriots Flying Elvii The team logo resembles an airborne Elvis, and Easterbrook reasons that Elvii is the plural of Elvis.
New Orleans Saints United States Saints

The Boy Scouts

 Following Hurricane Katrina the Saints were without a home field for an entire season, and were adopted by the rest of the country.

The fleur-de-lis logo used by the Saints is similar to the logo of the Boy Scouts
New York Giants Jersey/A The Giants actually play in New Jersey, at a venue which goes by the name Giants Stadium on days when the Giants are playing.
New York Jets Jersey/B The Jets play at the same New Jersey stadium as the Giants, but when the Jets play it is simply called The Meadowlands. A dig at the tendency for Giants seasons to generally fare somewhat better than Jets seasons.
Oakland Raiders Oakland Long Johns After the pirate of that name.
Philadelphia Eagles The Nesharim Philadelphia has the sole logo that faces right to left and "nesharim" means "eagles" in Hebrew, which is also read right to left.
Pittsburgh Steelers The Hypo cycloids The team logo features three hypocycloids.
San Francisco 49ers Squared Sevens Seven is the square root of 49.
Seattle Seahawks Blue Men Group The Seahawks wear entirely blue uniforms (most teams sport different colored jerseys and pants) making them resemble the performance group of the same name.
St. Louis Rams Les Mouflons A mouflon is a type of sheep whose curved horns are often mistakenly used as a depiction of ram horns. Dubbed after a series of what Easterbrook considered poorly played games by St. Louis.
Tampa Bay Buccaneers City of Tampa Buccaneers The team actually plays in the City of Tampa, Tampa Bay being a body of water.
Tennessee Titans Flaming Thumbtacks The team logo bears an uncanny resemblance to a thumbtack with a flame on the top.
Washington Redskins Potomac Drainage Basin Indigenous Persons
(also Washington Nanticokes)		 The Redskins have various facilities in both Virginia and Maryland, but none in the nation's capital. "Indigenous Persons" was used to avoid the more controversial "Redskins". The Nanticoke are the tribe indigenous to the area.

[edit] Tuesday Morning Quarterback Non-QB Non-RB NFL MVP Award

According to Easterbrook, the "longest [named] award in sports". This is the top award in a series of awards he publishes at the end of each season, known as the "All-Unwanted All-Pros." These awards were created due to Easterbrook's view that the awards and Pro-Bowl selection of various sports media outlets and the NFL tended to unfairly reward what he considered "glory boy" positions, such as quarterbacks, running backs and wide receivers, as well as players who tended to be more well known due to higher press coverage as opposed to actual quality of play. Easterbrook also was protesting the lack of attention given to offensive or defensive linemen whom he considers the most important positions in football. Criteria tend to vary from year to year but generally includes players who either were undrafted or cut from previous teams, but otherwise managed to play important or pivotal roles with their current teams over the course of the season.

Year Winner Team Position
2001 Alan Faneca Pittsburgh Steelers Guard
2002 Lincoln Kennedy Oakland Raiders Offensive tackle
2003 Damien Woody New England Patriots Guard
2004 Troy Brown New England Patriots Wide Receiver/Cornerback
2005 Walter Jones Seattle Seahawks Offensive tackle
2006 Jeff Saturday Indianapolis Colts Center
2007 Matt Light New England Patriots Offensive tackle

[edit] Notable articles

  • "Beam Me Out Of This Death Trap, Scotty" Washington Monthly, April 1980
  • "TV Really Might Cause Autism" Slate, October 16, 2006
  • "Finally Feeling the Heat" New York Times, May 24, 2006
  • "Case Closed: The Global Warming Debate Is Over" Brookings Institution paper, May 2006
  • "Who Needs Harvard?" The Atlantic Monthly, October 2004
  • "The End of War?" New Republic, May 30, 2005
  • "Debunking Doomsday" Wired, July 2003
  • "The Real Truth About Money" Time magazine, January 17, 2005
  • "There Goes the Neighborhood" New York Times Book Review, January 30, 2005
  • "Long Shot" The Atlantic Monthly, May 2003

[edit] Sports

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