Wikipedia:Featured list candidates/List of Moonlight episodes

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[edit] List of Moonlight episodes

I believe the list meets all the featured list criteria. There has been much improvement over the last month or so. Corn.u.co.pia ♥ Disc.us.sion 17:34, 30 May 2008 (UTC)

Comments

  • Per WP:LS#Bold title, don't wikilink the bold part of the title
  • Futher to that, repetitions of the article title in the Lead ( as in "This is a list of episodes … for Moonlight") are become less accepted. See Wikipedia talk:Featured list candidates/Archive 3#Straight repetitions of the title in the opening sentence
  • The show is described as being in the "supernatural" genre, but the main article calls it a "Paranormal romance, and the infobox there describes it as "Supernatural", "Action", "Horror", "Drama", "Romance", and "Crime". Pick one or two max and be consistent towards the main article, as this one is basically a sub-page.
  • "...with other vampires in the city." Which city?
  • "The program premiered..." Say "The series" instead, as program is more similar to a single episode.
  • Provide context to non-American readers by describing CBS. For my Featured stuff I've used "Canadian broadcast television network CTV", which for here can be turned into "...in the United States on CBS, a broadcast television network."
  • "Moonlight began its first season on September 28, 2007[1]" is a repeat of the second sentence. Additionally, references should be placed after punctuation, not midsentence
  • "55" and "eighty-eight". Per MOS:NUM, it doesn't matter which is used, but consistency throughout the article should be followed.
  • "only twelve episodes[5] of the original thirteen-episode order were produced." Again, mid-sentence placement of the reference needs fixing
  • "Moonlight was likely to return for a second season;[8] though on May 13, 2008, CBS announced that Moonlight was officially cancelled." Wrong punctuation mark with the semi-colon
  • Explain why Warner Bros. tried to sell the show to other networks. I assume they produced it, but it should be stated
  • I noticed the list of episodes is using {{episode list}}. A few months ago new Writer= and Director= fields were added to the template, so these should now be used instead of Aux1= and Aux2= for the same purpose.
  • Use "Episode #" instead of just "#". Use "Production code" or "Prod code" for PC.
  • Instead of the "American viewers in millions" column, I recommend changing it to "US Ratings/Share (total viewers)" as the article Nielsen Ratings says that that is how they are usually given. Then, as an example, for the first episode the entry would be "5.7/10 (8.54)". This would negate the subsequent ratings table.
    • Use the Aux4= field in the Episode list template, as the information is less to do with the episode as it was produced, and more to do with how well it was received by the public.
  • Episode 1:
    • "make it appear that the young coed was killed by vampires" and "co-ed" is used again later in the summary. What's a co-ed? If you mean female, I'd use that instead
    • "Fortunately, Mick comes to her rescue," With the use of "Fortunately", it sounds a little too in-universe for my liking
  • Episode 2:
    • "Mick becomes furious when convicted killer Lee Jay Spalding is released from prison after serving 25 years for murdering his girlfriend." It's not exactly clear whose girlfriend we're talking here
    • "Beth's friend Julia writes a bout about Spalding," Should be "about", I think
  • Episode 3:
    • "Now that Beth knows Mick's a vampire, things are tense between them." passive voice
    • Pipelink Sire (vampire) with "sire"
    • "his new bride, now ex-wife, Coraline." is clumsy
  • Ep 4:
    • Pipelink News leak with "leak"
    • "They hole up" is a bit colloquial
  • Ep 5:
    • First sentence is too long
    • Don't use "vamp"
  • Ep 6
    • "The vampire blood makes a human feel a bit like a vampire," Change the "a bit" part, and that comma should be a semi colon
  • Ep 7
    • "find her cameras, which were stolen." → "stolen cameras."? Same meaning, less words.
    • "is a dead ringer for" → "is identical to"?
    • "Doppleganger" → "Doppelgänger" and wikilink to Doppelgänger
  • Ep 8
    • No need for the comma in the first sentence
    • "post traumatic stress disorder" → "posttraumatic stress disorder"
  • Ep 9
    • "When Mick works closely on a case with Morgan, a photographer who bears strong resemblance to Coraline, Beth grows jealous and decides to research her background." No need to repeat that Morgan bears resemblance to Coraline, as it's discussed in Episode 6
    • "...not realizing that she has become human." How did this happen?
  • Ep 10
    • Explain what "Buzzwire" is. Is it a TV show? Magazine? If so it should be italicised, not in quotes per the WP:MOS.
    • "Mick kills him." The hitman, or Josef?
    • What signs does Coraline show of being a vampire?
  • Ep 11
    • What's the MS-13 gang?
    • "Mick and Beth witness the event, and drive after him." Comma isn't needed
    • "When they finally catch up, Mick attacks the perpetrators, though one manages to shoot Josh." is in a passive voice
  • Ep 13
    • How do we know his cure is temporary?
    • "When Beth's boss, Maureen, is killed" second comma isn't needed
    • Write out ADA in full and wikilink
    • Remove "Naturally"
  • Ep 14
    • "Buzzwire" again. Again, if it's a TV show or magazine/newspaper, it should be in italics instead.
    • "When Mick gets run over," → "Mick is hit by a vehicle, and"
  • Ep 15
    • "When Mick learns that the boy was the grandson of his World War II buddy, he realises that he may be the boy's biological grandfather." makes no sense
    • Comma isn't needed in "stalks Beth, and attempts to attack her"
    • According to Wiktionary, it's quitting with 2 t's.
  • Ep 16
    • Second sentence is too long and a bit confusing
    • Get rid of the first sentence, and put "a basketball player with ties to Josef and several other vampires" after Vince's name in the current third sentence
    • Explain why it's treason. And perhaps wikilink
    • "uknown" WP:TYOP
  • The Futon Critic is not considered to be a WP:RS, so that reference needs to go.
  • "Deadline Hollywood Daily". Looks like a blog, which is also not allowed under WP:RS.
  • Same for TVByTheNumbers.com

There's rather a lot to be going on with, so I'm opposing for now. Let me know when they've all been addressed. Matthewedwards (talk · contribs · count · email) 08:29, 31 May 2008 (UTC)

Comments

  • Don't italicize publishers that aren't publications in "References" per MOS:TITLE
  • Add an image of a DVD boxset, if one exists (I think it has one?)
  • Expand contractions, including "wasn't", and "doesn't"

Gary King (talk) 04:00, 8 June 2008 (UTC)

I believe I have made the appropriate changes, though I am not sure with publications should not be italicized. Corn.u.co.pia ♥ Disc.us.sion 10:31, 8 June 2008 (UTC)
Italics have been removed, where applicable. –thedemonhog talk • edits 18:15, 8 June 2008 (UTC)