Wikipedia:Featured article review/Saxophone/archive1

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The following is an archived discussion of a featured article review. Please do not modify it. Further comments should be made on the article's talk page or at Wikipedia talk:Featured article review). No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was removed 19:13, 7 January 2007.

[edit] Saxophone

[edit] Review commentary

Talk messages left at Music. Sandy (Talk) 03:00, 1 December 2006 (UTC)

Saxophone is an older, "brilliant prose" promotion. The lead is short and does not summarize the article. The article is largely uncited, using mixed referenced styles. It has external jumps, which are spam/advertish. External links are marked for cleanup, and some of the See also could be incorporated into the article. There are several one-sentence paragraphs Sandy (Talk) 03:00, 1 December 2006 (UTC)

  • I agree with Sandy. And the prose needs an audit. I started reading it and found—
    • "and played with a single-reed mouthpiece like the clarinet."—Should avoid the sense of "played like the clarinet", which it is not.
    • "He drew up plans for 14 different types of saxophones, but they were not all realized." How many were?
    • "here is good evidence that fitting a clarinet mouthpiece to an ophicleide is the most likely origin"—Where's the reference? The article is seriously under-referenced. Tony 13:15, 1 December 2006 (UTC)
  • Move to FARC, issued not addressed. Sandy (Talk) 18:34, 13 December 2006 (UTC)
  • I agree with most of what has been said. FARC definitely. --HisSpaceResearch 04:17, 15 December 2006 (UTC)

[edit] FARC commentary

Suggested FA criteria concerns are prose, LEDA, citations, and formatting. Joelito (talk) 17:20, 17 December 2006 (UTC)
  • Remove – The lead is too short, mixed citation style and the article is full of ext. spam links, either in the external links section and also in the main article as embedded links. — Indon (reply) — 12:59, 18 December 2006 (UTC)
  • Remove per Indon. CG 21:05, 25 December 2006 (UTC)
  • Remove. I cleaned up External link farm, and fixed sections to agree with WP:LAYOUT. Overlinked, undercited, mixed reference styles, inadequate lead, prose problems, external jumps to commercial websites. An embarrassment to FA - no improvement - I added a cleanup tag. Sandy (Talk) 01:02, 26 December 2006 (UTC)
  • Remove per above. LuciferMorgan 18:27, 31 December 2006 (UTC)
  • Remove per above.--Yannismarou 19:06, 3 January 2007 (UTC)
  • Remove per above. Tony 06:01, 6 January 2007 (UTC)
The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article review. No further edits should be made to this page.