Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/Adam Clayton/archive1

The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was not promoted 04:16, 23 October 2007.

[edit] Adam Clayton

Disclaimer: This is a self-nomination. The article has achieved GA status and has undergone peer review. Concerns may not be addressed for a few hours, I apologize for that. Thank you! Neranei (talk) 21:53, 26 September 2007 (UTC)

• Comments, the article is a good start but needs really a lot of work before it reaches FA states I am afraid. --Cpt. Morgan (Reinoutr) 10:53, 28 September 2007 (UTC)
  • The article is quite small. Now that does not have to be a problem, but in this case I really have the impression much more could be said. An example: the section about the solo projects is very limited (I am sure a lot more information is available just about the Mission:Impossible soundtrack, which actually was a big success for him and Larry). The article leaves the reader with many questions, that would have to be addressed in a comprehensive article, e.g.:
    • Why did just Adam and Larry work together on the MI track?
    • By who exactly was he influenced?
    • Did others follow his style?
    • How big really is his contribution to the songs by the band?
    • Why does he prefer those specific guitars?
    • etc..
  • When reading the intro, I have the feeling it just mentions random things that are not necessarily the most important ones. For example, why mention the IVor Novello award which was only a nomination (for the band even, not for Clayton personally) that they did not win. Surely there must be more important stuff to tell the readers in the lead of the article.
  • The awards section mainly deals with awards by the band, not by Clayton.
  • The Musical equipment section is largely unreferenced and not very informative.
  • The links in the "see also" section are trivial. If you must, mention somewhere in the text he is on a stamp, but I do not think articles like "List of people on stamps of Ireland" can be seen as further reading material for an article like this.
  • Perhaps the article can be expanded with a short sample of his bass playing?
  • Some more images would also be nice (e.g. Clayton closeup, clayton together with the band)
  • The references seem biased toward online referencing. The band U2 has been the topic of many books and even scientific articles. Much more information can probably be added if those are used as sources.
    • "scientific articles" - Woah...for a band, that's unexpected :) I'd like to point out, though, that I saw an excellent book named "U2 by U2" which would probably be very useful for this. — Dihydrogen Monoxide (H₂O) 02:22, 5 October 2007 (UTC)
      • It is indeed a great book, I have used it for sources periodically. Excellent book, that. And as for the scientific articles, I've heard of one involving whether listening to U2 makes you do better in school or something of the like. Neranei (talk) 02:28, 5 October 2007 (UTC)
        • Although far from comprehsenive or complete, this Google Scholar search gives a good indication: [1]. --Cpt. Morgan (Reinoutr) 19:20, 5 October 2007 (UTC)

• Comments - yeah, I'd have to second above comments. A good start but the article really needs some fleshing out. Tried to play with the prose a bit but prose isn't too bad, though paras are stubby. cheers, Casliber (talk · contribs) 14:42, 28 September 2007 (UTC)

Oppose—1a, 2a,

• "Although he is a British citizen, Clayton has resided"—Spot the two redundant words.
• "from the time his family moved to Malahide when he was five years old to the present." Why not just "since the time ..."?
  • Y Done Neranei (talk) 14:42, 20 October 2007 (UTC)
• "well known" must be hyphenated.
  • Y Done Neranei (talk) 14:42, 20 October 2007 (UTC)
• "He has worked on several solo projects throughout his career, including working with"—clumsy rep. (there are several others, too)
  • I reworded that to "...such as his work with...". Neranei (talk) 14:47, 20 October 2007 (UTC)
• "Clayton and U2 have together won 22 Grammy awards, more than any other rock artist." Fuzzy comparison: artist + group = artist?
  • I reworded that to "Clayton as a part of U2 has won 22 Grammy awards..."; is that better? Neranei (talk) 14:47, 20 October 2007 (UTC)
• "Clayton (right) performing with U2 at Madison Square Garden on 21 November, 2005 on the Vertigo tour." See MOS on the final period.
  • Y Done Neranei (talk) 14:44, 20 October 2007 (UTC)

Now, that's just in the very short lead. Tony (talk) 14:37, 20 October 2007 (UTC)

And the rest of the article? Tony (talk) 03:57, 21 October 2007 (UTC)

• Oppose There's almost no context at all. The article skips ahead from hiring a manager to the second album. Didn't Clayton perform on Boy? The whole article is like this, bouncing around the years without mentioning what happened in between. I realize that Clayton is a bassist, but he still probably had some influence on U2's body of work. As mentioned above me, this article also has some pretty awkward prose (especially the second paragraph of the body). And why isn't "solo projects" merged with "biography"? Teemu08 18:46, 21 October 2007 (UTC)

The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.