Talk:Eastern Wrestling Alliance

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[edit] Tone

If this was an article for a fansite, it'd be ok. However this is an encylopedia, and it needs to be much more formal. I won't list everything, but I'm sure you'll get the idea after this brief list.

• By coincidence and luck
• only to then see Tony Atlas fight his hardest to make the show go on
• when he left the company amid scandal
• Having the burden of the entire project on his shoulders

To be honest the history section is a bit long-winded and un-interesting, and completely unsourced. Personally I'd strip it down to the bare bones, and make sure everything that's there is sourced. One Night In Hackney₃₀₃ 07:40, 19 October 2007 (UTC)

Alright, like I said I see where you are coming from and being a new wikipedia contributor I am working hard to fix any tone problems. A few things I'd like to add.

• The line "only to then see Tony Atlas fight his hardest to make the show go on" refers to exactly what happens in the documentary on MTV refered to in the article. I'm currently trying to dig up the details for an exact reference/citation for the documentary that MTV produced in which this is well documented. Once that citation/reference is complete would you still say that that "belongs on a fansite"? If so then how might one refer to what happened in EWA history that is documented on an MTV produced documentary and refered to in this article with out this tone related problem?

• On the "By coincidence and luck" part would you think taking it down to just "During the filming of" or something of that sort would fix the problem?

• For the "when he left the company amid scandal" part I think I'll just go with a deletion of that, however he was forced to sell out for stealing money from the gate which is a part of EWA history as well. I guess until someone writes a book I can reference though I'll leave that part out.

• On "Having the burden of the entire project on his shoulders" I don't really see how this is opinion or my own research or something that really can be sourced. It's one way of saying he was the sole owner and operator of the promotion. Is the problem just that it's a more dramatic way of saying "being overwhelmed as the sole owner". I could use a little more feedback on that one please. Thanks.

I'll try to trim down the history section so it's not so long winded but is the fact that you are uninterested with the EWA's history really reason to delete things? I mean it is an encyclopedic entry, which all in all can tend to be uninteresting unless you are particularly interested in the subject already.

From what I read that you take issue with it appears that citations and references are more what would solve the problem in my opinion, and as I said I am still in the process of finding and listing more citations and references. If you were to assume all references were in place and tone was the sole issue to consider could you please take another look at the changes that have been made and give me a bit more advice on wording problems you see and what might be a better way of stating historical happenings in a better tone? Again I appreciate the help and I want to make this article as wikipedia-correct as can be. Thanks. WFPro 08:57, 19 October 2007 (UTC)

I'll get back to you later, been very busy sorry. One Night In Hackney₃₀₃ 21:18, 19 October 2007 (UTC)

No problem, I'm still working on it anyway so whenever you get a some time. WFPro 08:44, 20 October 2007 (UTC)