Dyad (spiritual workshops)

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The word Dyad is from the Greek (duad) and Latin (dyas, dyadis) roots - meaning two units treated as one.

Dyads are used for many types of Spiritual workshops, Enlightenment Intensives, Awareness Intensives, and Janus workshops.

Contents

[edit] Why Dyad

The Dyad looks simple enough with two people sitting in chairs or on pillows on the floor facing each other a few feet apart. The Dyad in practice is difficult to achieve. It is not a conversation. The Dyad is a process of completing communication cycles and listening without judgment. The listening partner must try to remain neutral so that the active partner is left free to be either positive or negative. They need this relationship freedom to reclaim their natural internal freedom - to help them discover their true self - and the true nature of the Life they are living. (They really don't need it - but they are confused - and the dyad helps them out of this confusion.)

In our "normal" conversation we are almost always giving people advice with one person tending to dominate the other. We don't "normally" know how to just listen. When we do listen we don't keep an open mind - instead we take sides. These "normal" conversation results in a level of abuse that creates and amplifies group think. Group think is a consensus agreement - everyone tries to think the same way and there is much emotional energy expended to keep everyone in line. All meaning is derived from the agreement with others. The Dyad is a process of interpersonal communication designed to prevent this abuse.

[edit] The Dyad Process

Two individuals sit a comfortable distance apart and at the same height. One individual is the receptive partner. The other individual is the active partner. The two roles are distinct and should not be combined.

The partners reverse roles (active and receptive) after each completed cycle. This is often called "changing-over." A cycle may be a fixed interval of time, typically five minutes, or one complete compliance with a dyad instruction. This latter form is called "cycle change-overs." Cycle change-over ends when the active partner lets the listening partner know that they are finished. If the five minute interval is used, the coach calls out, "Thank your partner; change-over," at the end of each five minute period. In small groups without a coach, it is easy to do this ahead of time with an audio tape.

The Dyad process is as follows:

1. The Receptive partner gives the instruction, using a "tell me" form of the question.
For example "Tell me who you are", or "Tell me what another is"
2. The Receptive partner gives the active partner their full attention and refrains from
any comments, considerations, or facial expressions. They fully listen and understands
what the other expresses.
3. The Active partner receives the instruction from the receiptive partner.
4. The Active partner contemplates the question received.
5. The Active partner responds with what occurred as a result of the contemplation.
6. If they are doing a cycle-changeover the Receptive partner acknowledges the work done
by the active partner, and they change rolls. If a fix time is used, then the active
partner goes into another contemplation on the question and continues to report what
happened as a result of that current contemplation.

Image:Dyad model 1.gif

Receptive partner gets the instruction clear in his/her own mind.
Receptive partner puts her/his attention on the active partner.
Receptive partner communicates the instruction clearly and directly to the active partner. (see 1)
Receptive partner keeps his/her attention on the active partner and is open to a response. 
Active partner listens to receptive partner and receives the instruction. 
Active partner complies with the instruction to the best of her/his ability. (see 2) 
Active partner communicates his/her compliance to the receptive partner. (see 3) 
Receptive partner listens to, receives, and understands the active partner's communication. 
Receptive partner acknowledges the compliance by saying, "Thank you," "OK," or some equivalent phrase. 
Partners reverse roles.

[edit] Perfecting the Dyad Technique

It is an instruction directed to the active partner, not a question.

It’s not, "What is help?"; it is (You) "Tell me what help is." The instruction should be delivered with
the expectation of a compliance. The difference between giving an instruction and asking a question
is that an instruction is directed toward the individual. A question tends to go directly to the mind,
bypassing the individual.

The instruction is something the active partner can do.

If he does not understand what to do, or just can’t do it for whatever reason, it is not a valid
instruction for him. The active partner must grasp the meaning of the instruction. If not, he will
either go silent or respond with something other than what is intended.

The instruction must be clear to the receptive partner as well.

Just saying the words will not work, because he will not know if the active partner complied or not,
and he will communicate some of his confusion to him. The receptive partner must know exactly what
he wants the active partner to do. Don’t begin a dyad until both partners understand the intent of
the instruction. Get help from the coach if either loses this conviction.

The instruction is given clearly and cleanly.

The receptive partner should not change the wording of the instruction, give it sloppily, or put his
own emotional content on the instruction to lead the active partner. The receptive partner should
not use facial expressions, nods, body language, "vibes," or any other means to express an opinion
or evaluation of what the active partner says.

Help from the facilitator or coach.

Whenever either partner does not know what to do next, he raises a hand to get help from the coach.
If the active partner finds he does not understand what he is being asked to do or what the
purpose of the instruction is, he should raise his hand for help from the coach. The dyad
should not continue while there is confusion about what the active partner should do to
comply with an instruction. 

If the receptive partner cannot remain neutral about what the active partner says, he should raise
his hand for help from the coach. There is no right answer to the instruction. There is only
the receptive partner's understanding of how the active partner sees that his response is
a compliance and how the active partner sees that it is a compliance.

Keep the communication connection alive.

When the receptive partner does not understand what the active partner said, he can say,"Clarify
that", or "Clarify the part about <...>.", or "Give me that again." or "Say that again, louder."
The receptive partner does not interfere with the active partners process. The active partner
is never wrong (i.e., bad), for not complying with the instruction. Just correct the non-understanding
and proceed. Get help from the coach if necessary.

Give the instruction each time as if it were the first time -- fresh.

It is not connected with a previous cycle nor does it anticipate a later cycle.

[edit] The Communication Cycle - Shoot for this idea in the Dyad

You have a thought.

You intend that another duplicate that same thought in his or her consciousness from you.

You do whatever it takes to get the thought across. (It may not be possible.)

The other duplicates the thought. He gets that thought, nothing added on and nothing left off.

The other acknowledges that he got your thought from you. (A simple "OK," "thank you," "got it," or the equivalent will do.)

Important! It may not be possible to get a communication across. It depends on the receiver as well
as the sender. One must be able to tolerate not getting a communication across to another.
Here are some of your options:
Wait until the other is ready – it could be forever.
Drop it entirely.
Find a prior communication that, if told to him first, would enable him to get your main message.
(There may be more than one prior message required.)

[edit] Dyad Instruction List

This information summarizes the important dyad instructions that Edward A Riddle has accumulated over the years. It also represents the kind of trial and error experimentation that should be extended and improved upon. Interpersonal relations are dynamic and therefore any fixed procedural process will not meet everyone's needs. Use whatever you think has potential, and write down those techniques that lead to useful growth experiences.

Tell me who you are.
Tell me what another is.
Tell me what life is.
Tell me what Love is.
Tell me what understanding is.
Tell me what you are.
Tell me your true nature.
Tell me the purpose of Life.
Tell me what Death is.
Tell me how life is fulfilled.
Tell me how life is best fulfilled.
Tell me what God is.

[edit] Sources