Children and Art

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"Children and Art" is the 54th episode of the ABC television series, Desperate Housewives. It was also the eighth episode of the show's third season. The episode was written by Kevin Etten and Jenna Bans and directed by Wendey Stanzler. It aired on November 12, 2006.

[edit] Guest Starring

• Dougray Scott as Ian Hainsworth
• Richard Burgi as Karl Mayer
• Kathryn Joosten as Karen McCluskey
• Ernie Hudson as Detective Ridley
• Matt Roth as Art Shephard
• Debra Monk as Marcella
• David Fabrizio as Detective Collins
• Ian Paul Cassidy as Durkin
• Allison Miller as Tanya
• Dixie Carter as Gloria Hodge

[edit] Co-Starring

• Pat Crawford Brown as Ida Greenberg
• Betty Murphy as Alberta Fromme
• Ingrid Sanai Buron as Scout Leader
• Barbara Gruen as Customer
• Kate Mulligan as Prosecutor
• Cierra Ramirez as Anne Marie
• Lenny Schmidt as Neighborhood man
• Thomas Silcott as Nursing Home Van Driver

[edit] Plot

Carlos and Gabrielle are divorced. An 11-year-old girl, Anne Marie, tries to sell magazine subscriptions and sees a picture of Gabrielle on Vogue. She asks Gabrielle why she abandoned the profession. Gabrielle wonders why too, and then goes back into modeling. She is surprised to learn that she will be dressed up as the mom of a sexy teenage girl, Tanya. Her agent tells her that she had to pull strings to get Gaby the job. Gaby, looking upset, does the shoot and then quits.

Bree asks Orson what his mother’s address is so she can put her on her Christmas card list. Orson tells Bree that she lives in a nursing home in Lakeview, a town 30 minutes away. He says that she’s suffering from dementia and that he doesn’t want to see her in that state. Bree travels to Lakeview to visit Gloria (Orson’s mother) and discovers that she is perfectly fine. She brings her back to her home for dinner. Gloria tells Orson she wants to go back home but Orson tells her that he’s sold her house, her car and all of her things. Orson calls for an ambulette to take Gloria back to the home but she steals it and crashes it into a fire hydrant. Bree offers to let Gloria stay in their house for a few weeks. Gloria tells Orson that if he doesn’t agree with Bree and let her stay, she’ll tell Bree his secret.

Mike is discharged from the hospital. Edie cleans his house and discovers Karen McCluskey has been stealing his lawn mower. Mike is still the suspect of Monique’s murder. Detective Ridley gets a warrant to search his house. He is looking for Mike’s toolbox, which he can’t find. Later, Mrs. McCluskey gives the toolbox back to Mike and tells him to clean his wrench. Karen was hiding it as a thank you for Mike saving her life.

Kayla is temporarily staying with Nora’s mother. Parker is very protective of Lynette because of her being shot in the arm at the store, and he won’t let her go to the supermarket. Lynette attempts to show him that she is okay when she is away from him by getting Art to pretend he’s a superhero. Lynette brings a cake to Art’s house who’s not home. The door is open so she leaves it on the table. Parker sees Art’s model train set and follows it into the basement. Art’s basement is full of arcade games, Lynette is impressed until she sees the back wall is plastered with numerous photographs of young boys without shirts (although earlier in the episode it was revealed that Art does coach swimming).

Austin and Julie have begun a relationship. Susan is concerned and gets Karl’s help to set limits for Austin and Julie but Karl is much more concerned with Susan’s relationship with Ian, and decides not to help. Austin and Julie both end up on the back of Austin’s motorcycle much to Susan’s dismay.

[edit] Note

• Although credited, Carlos Solis (Ricardo Antonio Chavira) does not appear in this episode.
• This is the only season 3 appearance that Karl Mayer [Richard Burgi] makes

[edit] Quotes

Gloria: "I just love the sauce. What gives it that kick?"
Bree: "Ah, ah, ah! You'd never ask a magician how a trick is done."
Gloria: "You've barely touched your salmon, dear. Is everything okay?"
Orson: "Yes. I was just wondering why you're here."
Gloria: "I want us to be friends."
Orson: "Okay, let's suppose I just had a massive head injury and believe you. We're pals. Now what do you want?"
Bree: "Orson, why does she have to have an ulterior motive?"
Gloria: "I want out of that home."
Orson: "Ah, there it is."
Gloria: "It's a hellhole! Besides, I'm perfectly healthy now. My hip is better, I can handle the stairs, and you said when I got strong enough I'd get to go back to my house."
Orson: "Oh, here's the thing. I sold it."
Gloria: "What?"
Orson: "You heard me."
Gloria: "What about my things?"
Orson: "All gone. Oh, I also sold the car. See, that's the thing about hellholes. They don't pay for themselves."
Gloria: "How dare you? You had no right!"
Bree: "Okay! Maybe I will share my secret ingredient."
Gloria: "I should have smothered you in your crib when I had the chance."
Bree: "Paprika! There, it's out!"
Orson: "That's the mother I remember! I was wondering when she'd show up."
Gloria: "Yes, Orson, I am your mother, so you more than anyone should know how I deal with betrayal."
(She leaves the room.)
Andrew: "So, can we call her grandma?"

Susan: "Are you crazy? If we don't do something, those two could end up having sex."
Edie: "Could?"
Susan: "Oh, my God! You don't..."
Edie: "I've got a box of condoms in my dresser. Eleven are gone. I can only account for eight of them."

Susan: "I forbid you to see him!"
Julie: "You can't do that! I choose who I date!"

Gloria (to Orson): "I gave you life. You know, I won't hesitate to take it away."

[edit] Title reference

The episode title, Children and Art is taken from a song from the Stephen Sondheim musical, Sunday in the Park with George.

[edit] International Titles

• French (Canada): Les conséquences de leurs actes (The Consequences of Their Acts).
• French: Austin Power
• German: Die Welt der Kinder (Children’s World)
• Italian: Art e i bambini (Art and Children)
• Polish: Dzieci i sztuka (Children and Art)
• Spanish: Los Niños y el Arte (Children and Art)
• Hungarian: Segítő kezek (Helping Hands)
• Montenegrin: Umjetnost Djece (Children's Art)

[edit] Awards Notes

• Andrea Bowen submitted this episode for consideration on her behalf in the category of “Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series” at the 2007 Emmy Awards.^[1]
• Dixie Carter also submitted this episode for consideration in the category of "Outstanding Guest Actress in a Comedy Series" on her behalf for the 2007 Emmy Awards. ^[1]

[edit] References