Author, Author (Frasier)

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“Author, Author”
Frasier episode

Frasier and Niles fighting it out over the book
Episode no. Season 1
Episode 22
Written by Don Seigel and Jerry Perzigian
Directed by James Burrows
Guest stars Mako (Sam Tanaka)
Luck Hari (Waitress)
Christine Lahti ("Caller - Laura")
Production no. 40571-020
Original airdate 5 May 1994 US
Episode chronology
← Previous Next →
"Travels with Martin" "Frasier Crane's Day Off"
List of Frasier episodes (Season 1)

"Author, Author" is the twenty-second episode of the first season of the American NBC television sitcom Frasier. The episode's title is possibly a reference to the 1982 film Author! Author! starring Al Pacino.

Contents

[edit] Main cast and characters

Kelsey Grammer – Dr. Frasier Crane
David Hyde Pierce – Dr. Niles Crane
John Mahoney – Martin Crane
Jane Leeves – Daphne Moon
Peri Gilpin – Roz Doyle

[edit] Plot

Meeting Niles in Cafe Nervosa, Frasier learns that his brother is meeting with Sam Tanaka, a publisher, over a book deal that Niles previously made. Niles is despondent, however; the idea he sold the publisher has already been done, and he cannot think of a replacement idea. Tanaka arrives, and is impressed to meet Frasier, having heard his radio show; intrigued by both brothers being psychiatrists, he suggests that the two should collaborate on a book about sibling relationships. Niles immediately claims that this is the idea he was going to suggest to Tanaka; Frasier, who has little interest in writing a book, is surprised and somewhat irate, but is soon convinced when Niles - who has dreamt of writing a book since childhood - reminds him of the collaborations that the two had done over the years, in particular, their "spring musical in prep school."

They commence writing the book at Frasier's apartment. Niles is extremely eager to start writing, but Frasier suggests that they actually find something to write about first; they soon hit on the idea of using Frasier's radio show as a way of studying sibling relationships, by using the anecdotes and stories of his listeners as material. Thus, Niles does a guest spot on Frasier's radio show. An initial attempt of Niles to adopt a 'radio persona' falls flat, but the brothers soon have plenty of initial research and material. Unfortunately, Sam Tanaka - who has been listening - is eager to see the results of their research, and when convinced that the brothers are well underway with the writing process, sets a deadline for the draft for the next Monday - that day being Friday. As the brothers have not even started, this places them under a certain amount of pressure - deciding to take inspiration from George Gershwin, they lock themselves in a hotel room and attempt to get the book both started and finished. Unfortunately, writer's block sets in, and their attempt to think of an opening sentence takes up a good chunk of their time. Finally deciding on an appropriate opening, they are unable to even agree on what form the sentence should take, as Niles insists on 'finishing the thought' and adding extra.This does nothing but add to the tension in the hotel room.

As Monday dawns, Frasier - having opened the minibar and finished an entire jar of macadamia nuts - resigns himself to reality, and persuades his determined brother that the book will never happen. His dream of being a published author scuttled, Niles explodes - yelling that he's 'fed up with being second all the time', he bitterly rails against the fact that Frasier, as the elder brother, has achieved everything that Niles wanted to first (such as becoming a psychiatrist, getting married and having children), and that his success and stature as a psychiatrist is overshadowed by Frasier's fame. The tension in the room finally boiling over, within moments the shouting match between the two turns into physical violence as the two wrestle each other around the room, before Frasier comes to his senses and storms out.

The next day, both brothers remain bitterly angry towards one another, to the extent that they will not speak to each other; arriving at Frasier's apartment, Niles intends to charge Frasier for the hotel room, whilst Frasier will not even acknowledge that he has a brother. As a fresh sniping match breaks out, Martin calms the two down by relating a story about Martin's old partner, Mitch Gussy. The two were once close, before a protracted stakeout saw the two officers bitterly fall out, with Mitch requesting a transfer - only to be critically injured when breaking up a bar fight, and dying before Martin could make it to the hospital to reconcile with him. Touched by the story, the two brothers reconcile, and Martin - embarrassed by the 'mushy stuff', heads to the kitchen, where he discovers that his story has made Daphne cry. He then reveals that Mitch Gussy never existed - and that at least one member of the Crane family can tell a story.

[edit] Series continuity

During this episode Martin claims he didn't have a brother, although in the season 5 episode 'Beware of the Greeks', Martin appears to have a brother but hasn't seem in 5 years since Frasier caused the family to separate.

[edit] Memorable Quotes

  • [After a caller has related the time her sisters shaved their heads because a perm destroyed her hair]
    Frasier: Niles, I would shave my head for you.
    Niles: A gesture that grows less significant with each passing year.
  • Frasier: Niles, is there a light bulb over my head?
    Niles: You have an idea?
    Frasier: [Sarcastic] No, I'm asking if there's actually a light bulb over my head.
  • Frasier: I do not have a fat face!
    Niles: Oh, please. I keep wondering how long you're going to store those nuts for winter.
  • [As Frasier attacks Niles during the out-of-control argument]
    Niles: My God, I'm having a flashback! You're climbing into my crib and jumping on me!
    Frasier: [Hysterical] You stole my mommy!!
  • Frasier: Dad, the hallmark of a mature man is one who realises that he cannot control his circumstances; he can only control his responses.
    Martin: Have you talked to your brother, yet?
    Frasier: [Petulantly] I do not have a brother! I'm an only child!
  • [After the argument; Niles has come to the apartment, but refuses to acknowledge Frasier]
    Niles: Dad, can you relate a message to Frasier?
    Martin: What makes you think I know where he is?
    Niles: Please tell Frasier that he owes me half of this hotel bill. Tell him I will accept cash, but no cheque, as I know he has trouble writing things.
    Frasier: I'm not paying this.
    Niles: Ah, so you're cheap as well as intellectually barren.
    Frasier: And you're a no-talent hack!
    Niles: And you look stupid in a T-shirt!

[edit] See also

[edit] External links