A Smith in the Hand

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“A Smith in the Hand”
American Dad! episode
Stan getting ready...
Episode no.	Season 1 Episode 9
Written by	David Hemingson
Directed by	Pam Cooke
Production no.	1AJN10
Original airdate	September 18, 2005
Newspaper Headline	"Israel Pulls Out of Gaza, Gaza Not Pregnant"
Season 1 episodes
American Dad - Season 1 May 1, 2005 – May 14, 2006
Pilot Threat Levels Stan Knows Best Francine's Flashback Roger Codger Homeland Insecurity Deacon Stan, Jesus Man Bullocks to Stan A Smith in the Hand All About Steve Con Heir Stan of Arabia: Part 1 Stan of Arabia: Part 2 Stannie Get Your Gun Star Trek Not Particularly Desperate Housewife Rough Trade Finances with Wolves It's Good to Be Queen Roger 'n' Me Helping Handis With Friends Like Steve's Tears of a Clooney

	Season 2 →
List of American Dad! episodes

"A Smith in the Hand" is the 9th episode of the animated series American Dad!. It features the special voice participation of Scott Menville (as Timmy/Kids), Peter MacKenzie (as Dr. Grossbard/Senator #1), Kevin Michael Richardson (as TV Announcer/Principal Lewis), Mike Henry (as Senator #2) and Mike Barker (as Dr. Heisler/Terry).

[edit] Episode summary

When Steve brings home a permission slip to take sex ed at school, Stan flips out and demands to Principal Lewis to get rid of it. But since it is required for Steve to graduate, Stan decides to teach the class himself -- with Steve as the only student. Stan proceeds to give an unrealistic explanation that demonizes sex and masturbation, so Steve won't give in to urges. Shortly after, he gets into an accident that damages his crotch when Steve accidentally burns it with a wood burner. Unable to comprehend what the instructions on applying lotion to his injured area, he calls the CIA doctor, who was in the middle of doing surgery on the Vice President. Due to misunderstanding, he assumes he has to masturbate to apply it. Soon, Stan becomes secretly hooked on masturbation. He uses up all his refills and traded his gun to get more lotion. He manages to avoid being found out by Francine, who feels he is no longer attracted to her. She tries to get breast implants but no size is good enough for her. Steve, who was responsible for his dad's accident, interprets his father's sudden reclusiveness as anger and disappointment in him. He begins to do all of his parents' chores around the house.

When Steve learns the truth about what his father is doing while cleaning near his window, Stan tries to get out of it by blaming television. Together, Stan and Steve convince the Senators to allow them hijack Langley Falls' TV network, and use it to broadcast Stan's anti-sex class, until Francine finally has enough of it and tells them that sexual feelings and arousal is natural, otherwise steve will follow in Stan's exact footsteps, just good enough to put a stop to their enterprise. So Stan, knowing Francine is right, tells Steve the truth about sex... on live TV. When he nears the end, having traumatized the whole town and leaving Steve baffled, Francine stops him.

Meanwhile, Roger becomes a bartender in hopes of making something of himself. He refuses to accept it as pretend when Hayley comes to his bar. He takes her fake ID card she uses to get into bars. Later, Hayley tries digging around in his insides for her card, only to get a living pancreas from inside. It goes wild and Roger had to put traps laced with peanut butter to catch it.

[edit] Cultural references

The way Klaus and Roger shout "Francine!" when she walks into Roger's bar is a throwback to NBC show Cheers, where everyone would shout "Norm!" when he entered the bar.

"The Simple Life - Life Without Parole" is a spoof of reality show, The Simple Life, which, at one point, was going to have Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie in a prison.

In "The Wages of Self-Abuse" quasi-educational video, two mythical consequences of excessive masturbation are portrayed: hairy palms and blindness.

The song that is playing while Francine is going back to the bedroom to get her underwear is O Fortuna from Carl Orff's Carmina Burana. (According to DVD commentary, this song was almost not used because the recording kept getting lost.)

The shows that Stan throws off the air after he took over a TV network include Wife Swap and SpongeBob SquarePants. The shows have been accused by conservatives of promoting homosexuality.

Roger's line, "Oh, what fresh hell is this?" before it cuts to Stan singing on TV is actually a famous line from writer Dorothy Parker (which she said when she answered the phone) and the title of her biography.

Stan Smith checks into the 'Bates Motel to have some "privacy".

[edit] Notes

The title "A Smith in the Hand" is a parody of the proverb, "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush."
The episode was originally going to air on September 11, 2005; it didn't because it showed a picture of Osama Bin Laden.
Stan's behaviour is known in psychology as reaction formation.
Stan's buttocks were digitally blurred out during the airing of the episode on the FOX version, however on the Cartoon Network airing and on the DVD, it is uncensored.
The cast performed this episode live at the 2005 Aspen Comedy Festival. The reading can be seen on the DVD.
In this show, no one ever actually says the word "masturbation" (similar to the famous Seinfeld episode The Contest, where Jerry, George, Elaine, and Kramer make a bet that none of them will pleasure themselves).
According to the American Dad DVD commentary (and collection of deleted and alternate scenes), there was a scene after Stan locks himself in the closet where Timmy (the boy from the "Wages of Self-Abuse" film) encourages Stan to masturbate.
The word "Fleischhosen" used by Klaus doesn't exist in German language (though, within the context of the part and the character background of Klaus being sexually attracted to Francine, "fleischhosen" could mean "erection").
In the DVD commentary about the part where Stan says, "Sons have a complex relationship with their mothers--especially if they're as beautiful and sexy as my mother," Mike Barker, Matt Weitzman, and David Hemingson talk about a possible future episode where Stan is attached to his mother in an almost sexual way. The season three episode Oedipal Panties was from the idea that was pitched in the commentary.
In this episode while driving Steve to school Francine says that she needs to return home due to the fact that Stan forgot to put underpants on her? however in the episode Frannie 911 during the scene where she is forced to carry Rodger, the original dialogue in this scene was Rodger saying Oh your a no underwear-person.