Wikipedia:WikiProject Military history/Peer review/Humbert Roque Versace

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[edit] Humbert Roque Versace

The editors would like for the group to comment on the areas that need improvement and any ideals for areas that need expansion.--Oldwildbill 18:29, 29 August 2006 (UTC)

[edit] Kirill Lokshin

Some brief remarks:

  • The lead should be longer; two full-length paragraphs would probably be suitable.
  • The "Biography" section can be split into two or three separate sections to make the flow somewhat easier.
  • The "Awards and decorations" and "Medal of Honor citation" sections should be combined into a single section giving the MoH citation as well as giving a prose summary of the other awards (with dates, etc.). The citation should use <blockquote>Text.</blockquote>, incidentally.
  • The "In memory" section looks rather stubby; if there's no more material with which to expand it, it may be better to simply merge it onto the end of the "Biography" section.
  • The "Bibliography" section is redundant with the "Further reading" section, and should be eliminated.
  • The notes and references need to be more detailed. In particular, websites need to have a date of access, at a minimum, and ideally more details like publication dates and authors.
  • The "See also" should be eliminated by linking from within the main body of the article, if at all possible.
  • What's the strange "United States" doing at the bottom of the article?

Kirill Lokshin 02:03, 31 August 2006 (UTC)