University of St Andrews Football Club

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St. Andrews University F.C.
Full name	St Andrews University Men's Football Club
Nickname(s)	The Saints
Founded	1887
Ground	University Park St. Andrews Fife
Capacity	?
Manager	Austin Mcphee
League	Fife Amateur Division 1
Home colours 　 Away colours

Formed in the late 19th Century. The Club currently have 3 teams participating in the Fife Amateur League (Saturday) and in the BUSA League (Wednesday).

Contents 1 History 1.1 Senior/Amateur Saturday Football 1.2 Inter-University Competition 2 Management 3 Tours 4 Traditions 4.1 Songs 4.2 Donkey Jacket 4.3 Golden Boot 4.4 Initiation 5 Characters 5.1 Early 90s 5.2 Late 90s 5.3 Early 00s 6 Myths and Legends 6.1 Early 90s 6.2 Late 90s 6.3 Early 00s 7 "Famous" Ex-Players 8 Past Club Captains

[edit] History

[edit] Senior/Amateur Saturday Football

The Club fully affiliated to the Scottish Football Association (SFA) in 1907, playing Senior Football until it allowed its membership to lapse in 1939. Since then the University Teams have been playing in the local Amateur league.

In the early 20th Century the four 'Ancient' Universities (Aberdeen, Edinburgh, Glasgow and St. Andrews) were given a bye into the 3rd qualifying round of the Scottish Cup. St. Andrews debuted in 1907 against the Vale of Atholl in front of 1000 spectators at University Park.

The Club have appeared in the Scottish Cup proper on three occasions losing 10-1 to Cowdenbeath in 1923, 3-0 at home to Bathgate in 1929 and 6-1 away to Nithsdale Wanderers in 1930.

A second XI can be traced back to the 1923/24 season, but it is unknown exactly when the Club first entered a second team into the Fife Amateur League. However, when they did so it was under the moniker 'United Colleges' in reference to the amalgamation of St. Leonard's and St. Salvatore's Colleges' in 1747. The Club have spent most of their time in Divisions 1 and 2. Their most successful season to date was 2003/2004 where they were 'promoted' to division 1 via a restructuring of the league and they won the Division 2 Cup, defeating Inverkeithing Swifts in the final 2-1.

The Club entered a third team into the Saturday Amateur League for the first time in 2005, under the banner of St. Andrews Academicals. The added incentive of Saturday games has dramatically increased the commitment of the 3rd team players and it is hoped that this will soon be reflected by results on the pitch.

The University and the Colleges currently play in Fife Amateur League Division 1 and the Academicals play in Division 2.

[edit] Inter-University Competition

The Club competed against the four Ancients in 'Friendly' competition from their formation in 1887 until the introduction of the Queen's Park Shield in 1921. The First XI have won the competition three times the last being in 1942/43. The format of the Shield changed a number of times over the years, but changed for good in the late 1990s when BUSA took over the co-ordination of Scottish University Football from the now defunct SUSF. The Shield is now awarded to the winner of the Scottish 1A Conference, which for the last four years has been won by Herriot Watt. St. Andrews 1st XI have, since the late nineties, been in Scottish Conference 2A suffering many years of frustration and near misses in their quest for promotion.

This all changed in 2005 when the team won the Conference and promotion into the top division. On top of that the team qualified for the BUSA Trophy, a British University knock-out competition, for the first time. After defeating the University of Central Lancashire in the last 16 and University of York. St. John in the quarter-finals, the team were very unfortunate to lose to DeMontford University on penalties, in a game that was watched by over 150 at University Park.

The United Colleges (2nd X1) are also believed to have competed in friendlies up until the advent of the SUSF Paterson trophy in 1973/74. A competition that they have won a number of occasions the last being in (?). In 2002 the Colleges came close to winning the Trophy and entry to BUSA plate but were lost the league by 1 point to Stirling University. With the advent of integrated leagues (all 1st, 2nd and 3rd XI play in the same league and can be promoted/relegated to any division) in BUSA competitions in 2004, the Paterson Trophy disappeared. Since 2002 the team have suffered a couple of relegations and are fighting for promotion from Scottish 5a.

The Academicals (3rd XI) entered the Colts trophy at its inception in 1979/80. The team have never won the competition, but came close in 1999/2000 and 2000/2001. The majority of players from these years went on to play for the first XI. In fact the team of 2000/2001 defeated the United Colleges by 4-1 in a highly contested 'friendly' match. The team are currently holding their own in BUSA Scottish Conference 5b.

SUSF did organise an indoor five-a-side tournament and a Freshers' tournament. The inaugaral tournament of the former was won by Edinburgh in 1975/76, but St. Andrews have won it three times since then in 1977/78, 1981/82 and 1985/86. The competition stopped running in the mid-90s for reasons unknown.

The Freshers' Tournament was first contested in 1984/85 and has been dominated by Edinburgh University since its inception. Saints finally lifted the trophy in 1999/2000 winning every game in the regional competition in St Andrews and the finals in Edinburgh. Most of the 'Golden Generation' went on to pick up University Colours later in their Saints careers. With increased games in the BUSA leagues and each University putting more and more teams into the Amateur Leagues, the competition came to an end in 2003/04.

[edit] Management

Since the Club has an ever changing roster of Office Bearers and limited resources, it has been difficult to attract coaches of a high quality on a regular basis. In the late 1980s, Andy Law, a barman from the Central Bar on Market Street, volunteered to coach the First XI, providing much needed objectivity from the sidelines.

In the mid-90s, rector Donald Findlay helped to provide coaching on a sporadic basis from Rangers F.C. But with the Q.C's resignation as rector came the end of the tie-up. In between times, all three squads have relied on the team captains to take training and pick the team.

During the 1997-98 season, the then AU president and 1st XI left-back, Thomas Finbar Patrick William Doyle, drafted in Eric Walker to help first team captain Ross Gilder, whose form was suffering as a result of the dual strains of team selection and his ever increasing waistline. Walker's arrival, a former Scottish Amateur Cup winner (sporting discipline unknown), looked like it would herald a new era of total football within the club. However, the new managerial duo only ever really hit it off during happy hour which lead to both departing (Gilder to the The Kinnes Fry Bar and Walker to Bell's distillery) shortly after.

In 2002 the first team took the unprecendented step of 'employing' a coach to take training and attend matches, but with team selection remaining with the Captain. Gary Cardle coached the team to varying success before 'losing the dressing room' in the 2003/2004 season. He moved on to Cowdenbeath F.C. Youth team and Herriot Watt 2nd XI respectively.

The reigns were immediately taken up voluntarily by Peter Henry, father of 1st team player Pete Henry Jnr. His effect was immediate, with the players galvanised, the team finished mid-table in the Fife Amateur Premier League and second in the BUSA Scottish 2a Conference in his first season.

In his second the team's standards slipped in the Fife League and they were eventually relegated. However, the team marched to to League victory in the BUSA Scottish 2a Conference and the semi-finals of the BUSA Trophy in 2006.

Henrys coaching methods proved unpopular and after falling out with some of the players, this led to his departure from the club. Happily, however, the University agreed a deal in July 2006 with Dundee United F.C. allowing the professional Club to train on the University grounds in return for professional coaching for all three University teams.

The Tayside Club assigned Austin McPhee as the regular Coach for the University. Austin hails from Fife and has played professional football in Japan and NCAA Division 1 College Soccer for UNCG. He holds a UEFA A-License and 2006/2007 is his first season in charge.

[edit] Tours

The Club has gone on numerous tours, spreading the Saint's gospel far and wide to the local amateur teams.

• The first known tour was to Spain in 1989
• Cyprus 1997, played three, lost three, goals scored 4, goals conceded 17
• Barcelona played host to notorious 1999 'White Monkey' tour
• Greece was the venue for the 2002 tour
• The Club intend to tour Prague in mid-2007

The United Colleges have made a couple of short breaks in recent years:

• Ireland in 2002 and Germany in 2006.

[edit] Traditions

[edit] Songs

• Away the Lads - To the tune of 'Blaydon Races.' Origination unknown

• I Can't Read - To the tune of (?) Origination unknown
• Only You - Chart hit by The Flying Pickets, introduced by the 1990 squad. Last known rendition at University Park in 1996.
• Blue and White Stripes of St. Andrews - To the tune of 'The oldest established crap game in New York' from Guys and Dolls. Written by Andrew Wilson ('00) circa 1998 and memorably performed by him at the 2002 Football Club ball.
• We're Blue, We're White - To the tune of 'The Quartermaster's Store.' Origination unknown.

[edit] Donkey Jacket

Introduced in 2002. Taking inspiration from Celtic's award of a 'Donkey t-shirt', the team votes on a 'Donkey' of the week after each game. The 'winner' must then wear the Donkey Jacket (variously - a yellow puffa jacket; tartan suit jacket and a red boiler suit) until the next game. If said person is spotted around St. Andrews by a fellow team member without the jacket, an extra shot is added to the 'Donkeys' dirty pint which is consumed after the next game.

[edit] Golden Boot

Introduced in (?) Awarded annually at the Ball to the Club member who successfully eloped with the largest volume of "desirables". Lifetime achievement award given to Chris Brayford ('98) in 2005.

[edit] Initiation

Introduced in (?). Every Fresher who joined the Football Club had to be "initiated". This would comprise of many things, but the main element was the "Fish and Chips" ruse. After the first away game of the season, the Club Captain would announce as the bus neared Guardbridge that we were going for Fish and Chips in Guardbridge on club funds. The bus would empty, then the senior players would somehow try to get back on the bus without the Freshers cottoning on and then drive off leaving the youngsters to scratch their heads. With the advent of the mobile phone, this part of the initiation was made more difficult, as Freshers could just phone a taxi. To counter this, a plan was devised to keep hold of the valuables that they had given up before the game until the bus returned to St Andrews.

Particularly successful attempts were those on Ross Chanin (JYA '03) and Andreas Reitzel ('04).

On our way into St Andrews from the Anstruther side, the bus driver agreed to our silliness and played an oscar nominating role in the prank. About 3 miles away from St Andrews, the driver somehow made a large noise which could feasibly have come from the bus, then pulled the bus over. Ross was all too happy to help out, going round the back of the bus and looking under the exhaust for an apparent problem as his team "mates" ran back onto the bus and sped off. Ross, having no idea where he was ran in front of the next passing car, which screeched to a halt and gave him a lift back to the pub.

Andreas on the other hand was left in Guardbridge on his own without his phone or wallet. Having played 90 minutes in Queensferry on a pitch more suited to downhill skiing than football (a reference to its incline, rather than the weather) managed to run the 3 3/4 miles back to St Andrews in around half an hour!

[edit] Characters

Some members were the life and soul of the Club on and off the park. During their St. Andrews careers they left an indelible mark on the club and on their peers.

[edit] Early 90s

[edit] Late 90s

[edit] Early 00s

William Storey (DNG)
Universally known as Bomber. Will is most famous for not graduating and for being the greatest storyteller since Verbal Kint. His time at University spanned from 1997 right through to 2003, but despite protestations to the contrary he never got further than second year maths modules.

A talented footballer, Will often troubled Bryan 'Bouff' Hawkins in the race for top scorer. His skill, technique and large mouth were never suited to the fields of Fife, where he was often singled out for special treatment. On one occasion, a Pittenweem player raced into the changing rooms with a metal peg intent on attacking him.

Will was distinctly un-PC in his opinions and would often be heard pontificating loudly about his distaste for the Royals and the members of the Kate Kennedy Club. Since leaving St. Andrews, he has allegedly worked as a game-keeper in Africa; an importer of Ivory and a salesman for Toshiba. He also plays for Hampton and Richmond reserve team (allegedly).

[edit] Myths and Legends

Over the years some events off the park have become part of the Club's folklore with stories passed on from generation to generation:

[edit] Early 90s

Ryan Cameron's Media Highlight

Wolfenson Brother's Caged

[edit] Late 90s

Gilder Ends Peebles' Career

[edit] Early 00s

Liv the Impaler

Moir See's Red Again, and Again, and Again

It was early 2002, and St Andrews had made a trip to Buckhaven to play bottom of the league Buckhaven Town in a must win league game. Captain Stu Turnbull ('03) fielded an attacking side, starting with three at the back and five in midfield. Drawing 0-0 at half time, changes were made which saw the introduction of David Moir ('03) in the middle of the park. Within minutes of being on, the feisty Moir was in the referee's book for a rash tackle. Dave, who was apparently pissed off at not being in the starting eleven, continued to take out his anger on the opposition and the referee. After another knee high challenge the rather corpulent official dug into his pocket again, producing a second yellow card then a red. David was quite obviously not amused.

Moir: "F**k off you fat c**t."

At this point the referee announced that would be included in his match report and that was 2 red cards. Moir wasn't finished.

Moir: "F**k your report you fat s**t".
Ref: "That's three red cards, please leave the field of play".
Moir: "You should be f**king leaving the field of play after this performance ya f**king d**k".
Ref: "Right that's 4."
Moir: "Fu**k off to your fat wife, and have her bake you a f**king cake ya pr**k!"
Ref: "That's 5!"

At this point the rather bemused skipper trotted over.

Turnbull: "What's going on?"
Ref: "This player has now received 5 red cards for his actions towards me"

And finally, the icing on the cake:

Moir: "Why don't you make it 6 you fat lump of lard"

Shortly after David was particularly unwell and his ban was negotiated to be reduced to just 3 games as opposed to the rightful punishment of a 3 year ban from football and a holiday in Methil.

Stewart's Revenge Mission Leads to Knock-out Blow

It was a home league match in 2004 against the 'aggressive' Methilhill Strollers. Left-back Neil Stewart ('05) was frustrated after seeing team-mate Scott McMaster (DNG) kicked off the ball by Methilhill's centre-midfielder and felt the need to exact revenge. Instead of going in hard at the next challenge, Stewart chased down the offending midfielder and attempted to 'half' him. In the event it was a poorly executed wimpish kick. A brawl ensued with the opposition substitute goalkeeper relishing the opportunity to punch students with impunity given that short-legged ref Tam Bisset was never likely to brandish a card.

After a few minutes and the offending midefielder making a slit throat gesture towards Stewart, the game resumed with a goal kick. As the players kept an eye on the ball, a blood-curdling crack from the team's left-back area drew their attention. There they saw Neil Stewart prone on the floor with the aforementioned Methilhill midfielder trotting away. Concerned that being kicked by a student would lead to abuse and questions about his masculinity, the Fifer had headbutted the unsuspecting Stewart off the ball leaving him concussed with blood pooring from his face. While Saint's players attended to their stricken left-back, referee Bisset admitted he 'didnae see it' and he 'couldnae do anything about it.' While Stewart left the field of play for medical attention, he still managed to enjoy the evening's drinking festivities through a straw.

The away match had quite a build up with the league promising a strong referee and league representation to ensure the safety of the University players. In the event, the game was particularly tame and ended in a 2-2 draw.

[edit] "Famous" Ex-Players

• Bryan "Bouff" Hawkins Spartans 2004- ( app, Goals)
• Presley Orhue Cowdenbeath 2003-04 (1 app, 0 Goals)
• Matt Dyer East Fife 1996-99 (44 app, 16 Goals)
• Ryan Cameron East Fife 1996-97 (15 app, 1 Goal)
• Jonathan Wild Manchester City 1967-1987 (432 app, 1 Goal)
• Dave Young Raith Rovers 1992-94 (? app, ? Goals)

• PW Dirkin earned two Scottish Amateur Caps, both against Ireland in 1951 and 1952

[edit] Past Club Captains

2006-2007 Jeff Flis
2005-2006 David MacAulay
2004-2005 Neil Stewart
2003-2004 Richard Watson
2002-2003 Frazer Wilson
2001-2002 Chris Hull
2000-2001 Richie Walker
1999-2000 Andrew Wilson
1998-1999 Chris Keay
1997-1998 Simon Taylor
1996-1997 Jonathan Wild
1995-1996 James Edge
1994-1995 Alwyn Bell
1993-1994 Jonathan Arana
1992-1993 Mark Gray
1991-1992 Alan Marshall
1990-1991 Cameron Brown
1989-1990 Dave Pritchard