The Dangerous Lives of Altar Boys
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| The Dangerous Lives of Altar Boys | |
|---|---|
 The Dangerous Lives of Altar Boys film poster |
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| Directed by | Peter Care |
| Produced by | Jodie Foster, Jay Shapiro |
| Written by | Chris Fuhrman (novel), Jeff Stockwell, Michael Petroni |
| Starring | Jodie Foster, Emile Hirsch, Jena Malone |
| Distributed by | ThinkFilm |
| Release date(s) | 18 January 2002 |
| Running time | 104 minutes |
| Language | English |
| Budget | ~ US$12,000,000 |
| IMDb profile | |
The Dangerous Lives of Altar Boys is a 2002 film directed by Peter Care. The film stars Emile Hirsch, Kieran Culkin, Jena Malone, Jodie Foster, and Vincent D'Onofrio. The film is based on a novel by Chris Fuhrman.
The film is about a group of Catholic school friends who engage in a series of pranks and general mischief. The boys also collaborate on a comic book they call The Atomic Trinity. Interspersed within the film are segments of animated footage based on the comic book.
Fuhrman died of cancer before completing the final draft of the novel. The film is dedicated to his memory.
[edit] Plot
- Tagline: Forgive me father, for I am 14.
The four "altar boys" in the film are best friends attending a private Catholic school, St. Agatha's. They smoke cigarettes, drink, and rebel in normal, somewhat intellectual ways. (For instance, they examine William Blake's poetry for subversive content). Francis Doyle is the protagonist, while Tim Sullivan is his best friend. Francis, Tim, and their two best buddies work on a comic book called the Atomic Trinity (shown in animated bits throughout the film), with the characters of Major Screw, Captain Ass-Kicker, the Muscle (later Skeleton Boy), and Brakken. In the animated comic book sections, the archvillain is an evil motorcycle-riding nun named Peg-Leg (based on an overly strict St. Agatha's teacher, Sister Assumpta). Sorcerella (based on fellow student Margie) is a minor female character in the comic. She and Francis develop a flirtation that leads to a sexual relationship. Later she reveals that her older brother has had sex with her on several occasions--first leading Francis to believe it was rape, then explaining that she essentially seduced her brother, blackmailing him into continuing.
When Francis and his school friends visit a zoo on a school field trip, they see a cougar, and an idea forms. They plan to tranquilize the cat, remove it from its enclosure with a winch, and release it in Sister Assumpta's office to make her think it "tracked her scent" there. They soon test the winch on a school statue of St. Agatha, removing her from the top of the school.
Some time into their relationship, Margie reveals to Francis the past situation with her brother. Francis, who can no longer keep that revelation to himself, tells his best friend Tim. Later, in gym class, when Margie's brother hits Tim in the groin with a soccer ball and asks, "Is that low enough?", Tim blurts out, "Not as low as fucking your sister." Seeking revenge for the hurtful comment, Margie's brother gives the Atomic Trinity book (containing "blasphemous and disgusting" pictures such as Nunzilla and "two evil babes trying to figure out 69") to Sister Assumpta, who expels Francis from St. Agatha's.
Using funny schoolboy logic, Francis and his friends go to the zoo to knock out the cougar with some homemade tranquilisers, thinking this will get Francis back into school. They spot a cougar and shoot their "K-Mart Blowgun" at it. The tranquiliser hits, and the cougar seems subdued. Tim jumps into the cougar's enclosure to check if it is fully unconscious and is attacked by a second and unknown cougar. Tim dies from his wounds. Francis, speaking at Tim's funeral, quotes from William Blake in memory of Tim's subversive curiosity.
[edit] Cast
| Role | Actor |
|---|---|
| Francis Doyle | Emile Hirsch |
| Tim Sullivan | Kieran Culkin |
| Margie Flynn | Jena Malone |
| Sister Assumpta | Jodie Foster |
| Father Casey | Vincent D'Onofrio |
| Wade Scalisi | Jake Richardson |
| Joey Anderson | Tyler Long |
| Donny Flynn | Arthur Bridgers |
