Tamar (Bible)

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In the Bible Tamar - תָּמָר "Date Palm", Standard Hebrew 'Tamar, Tiberian Hebrew Tāmār was the daughter-in-law of Judah, to whose eldest son, Er, she was married (Gen. 38:6). After her husband's death, she was married to Onan, his brother (8), and on his death, Judah promised to her that his third son, Shelah, would become her husband. This promise was not fulfilled, and Tamar disguised herself as a temple prostitute and offered herself to her father-in-law Judah. She claimed his staff, signet and cloak as pledge of payment. From this union, Tamar became pregnant. When Judah accused her of fornication, she produced the staff and signet and identified Judah himself as the father. Tamar had twin sons, Zarah and Pharez (Gen. 38:30). Tamar enabled Judah to have children of non-Canaanite lineage.

[edit] Significance of the story of Tamar

Most commentaries on Genesis 38, an episode that interrupts the larger story of Joseph being sold into Egypt, conclude that its main purpose is to contrast Joseph's righteousness with Judah's wickedness. While this is true, there seems to be another purpose. The story of Tamar depicts Judah's growth and repentance as he overcomes his past misdeeds and learns to take responsibility for his actions. Tamar plays a key role in his development, as evidenced by his statement in Gen. 38:26.

Judah showed a pattern of running away from his problems.

With all his brothers except Reuben, rather than resolve his differences with Joseph civilly, he conspired to kill Joseph and throw him in a pit (Gen. 37:30).
After Reuben forbade his brothers to kill Joseph, Judah was the one who instigated them to sell Joseph to slavers (Gen. 36:26-27), insisting on some way of getting rid of his brother rather than confronting their differences.
With all his brothers, rather than confess to his father, he joined them in lying about Joseph having died.
Unique among his brothers, Judah moved away shortly thereafter (Gen. 38:1). His remorse over the event and desire for concealment may be what drove him to do so, rather than bear living in his father's household trying to comfort him at the loss of his birthright son.
When his sons Er and Onan died, the levirate law of marriage required that Judah give Tamar to his third son, Shelah, since she was part of Judah's household now and needed a husband to care for her and conceive her children so she would be taken care of in her old age. Instead, Judah sent her back to her father's house, intending to never retrieve her and preferring instead to pass her care into the hands of another, her father. This was a shameful abdication of his responsibility as head of the household (Gen. 38:11).
When Judah heard that Tamar was pregnant out of wedlock, he seized the opportunity to rid himself of the burden he saw her as, calling for her execution (Gen. 38:24).

Tamar, on the other hand, showed a pattern of forgiveness and discretion, not wanting to publicly shame Judah.

Instead of publicly denouncing Judah for his irresponsibility in not providing her with a husband (and thus posterity), she privately went about the process of acquiring a child through Judah (albeit in a disreputable way) (Gen. 38:12-23).
When Judah called for her execution, instead of openly announcing that he, too, was guilty of fornication, she carefully used a means that made clear to him that she knew his secret while at the same time not revealing it to onlookers (Gen. 38:25).

Judah realized that not only had he been avoiding his duties and reneging on his commitments, but that the person most hurt by his actions had bent over backwards to save him trouble and loss of reputation. His whole attitude changed at that moment, shown in several ways by Gen. 38:26.

He praised Tamar, saying, "She hath been more righteous than I, because that I gave her not to Shelah my son." He admitted that whatever her faults and sins were, they were done out of desperation, while his sins were greater, being done out of negligence.
"Judah acknowledged them," meaning the tokens that proved he was the father. Not only was he admitting his own sin, he was accepting the responsibility to care for the children Tamar bore. He did so, and they are mentioned as part of his family when they all move to Egypt (Gen. 46:12).
"He knew her again no more." To some, this is evidence of the respect he had gained for Tamar, being willing to provide for her as a wife but not demanding that she provide him conjugal privileges.

Judah stopped running away from his duties and instead faced up to them. He moved back to his family and began the slow process of repairing the relationships damaged by his and his brothers' rash decision so many years earlier. He later demonstrates his change of heart to Joseph by unselfishly offering to become a slave in order to save his brother Benjamin (Gen. 44:33). Judah's dramatic change of heart seems to have been greatly catalyzed by the actions of Tamar. Thus, even with it's rather unusual plot, the episode of Tamar serves as more than just a foil to contrast Joseph's righteousness and Judah's wickedness. It can be read as an inspiring tale of how the God of the Old Testament used the imperfect person of Tamar to help Judah turn from his wickedness.

[edit] Other Tamars in the Bible

Other Tamars in the Bible include:

A daughter of David (2 Sam. 13:1-32; 1 Chr. 3:9 ), and thus a descendant of #1. Her half-brother Amnon raped her and afterwards hated her exceedingly.
A daughter of Absalom (2 Sam. 14:27), niece of #2 and a descendant of #1. Mother of Maachah, who became Rehoboam's wife.
A place mentioned by Ezekiel (Ezekiel 47:19 Ezekiel 48:28; ), on the southeastern border of Israel. Some suppose this was Tadmor.