Star Wreck (book series)

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Star Wreck is a series of Star Trek parody novels by Leah Rewolinski and Harry Trumbore. The basic plot is that the crews of the original series and the Next Generation are mixed up in one ship and try their worst to gain control of the situation. The most noticeable trademark is that all characters, items and locations derived from the Star Trek series have "slightly" altered names.

Original Crew:

  • James T. Smirk - the captain of the old crew, and a ladies' man who is always looking for 'classy dames'. Very easy-going when he is supposed to be serious.
  • Mr. Smock - the Vulture officer and second-hand man. Has a running feud with Dacron about being the knowledgable guy on board.
  • Doc McCaw - the grumpy ship doctor, affectionally nick-named "Moans". His personality is best expressed by his favorite line: "I'm a doctor, not [insert]."
  • Mr. Pavlov Checkout - the token Russian of the crew. Very bad at piloting and communications.
  • Mr. Hikup Zulu - the token Oriental. Level-headed, and skilled in karate.
  • Mr. Snot - the old crew's chief engineer. Is very secretive about the secrets of the trade, and his favorite lines are pessimistic remarks about the functionality of the devices he has to work with. Full name is Sean Michael Thomas Snot III.
  • Lt. Yoohoo - the "two-in-one" representative for both women and Afro-Americans, and the communications officer. Has a questionable aptitude for singing, and tends to bleat in fright when confronted with a crisis.

The Next Generation:

  • Jean-Lucy Ricardo - the up-tight up-right counterpart of Smirk. Is very conscious about his bald plate, and has a passion for Earl Grape Tea, which often makes him ... say, a little short-fused. His favorite phrase is: "Make it so" with ever-changing endings.
  • Commander Piker - habitually called "Number One" by Captain Ricardo. His speciality is to strike a dramatic pose when things do get dramatic; and in the past and present he gets clipped on the head, which does not contribute to his intellectual qualities.
  • Counselor Deanna Troit - as a Betavoid, she has telepathic abilities and therefore serves as the crew's shrink. Amply "out-fitted", her bosom tends to respond well - or not so well - to changes in motion.
  • Wart - the in all things a little too aggressive Kringle officer.
  • Lt. Comdr. Dacron - the token brand-off merchandise android (hence his white skin). Has a tendency to bore people to death with his to-the-point statements and thus has earned the enmity of Mr. Smock.
  • Lt. Georgie LaForgery - the chief engineer of the new crew. Wears a visual prosthesis to both allow him to see and to conceal his fake eyeballs.

The books are:

  • Star Wreck: The Generation Gap
  • Star Wreck II: The Attack of the Jargonites
  • Star Wreck III: Time Warped : A Parody-Then, Now and Forever
  • Star Wreck IV: Live Long and Profit : A Collection of Cosmic Capers
  • Star Wreck V: The Undiscovered Nursing Home
  • Star Wreck VI: Geek Space Nine
  • Star Wreck VII: Space the Fido Frontier
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