Spiritual friendship

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Spiritual Friendship is a Buddhist concept of friendship within Buddhist community life, holding particular importance to not only the peer relationships in Buddhism, but also the teacher/student and the Husband and Wife relationship. It is described as a friendship based on shared values, especially the Three Jewels, and is based around spending as much time as possible with friends who share the same ideals, which supports ethical living.^[1] The concept has recently become more connected with the Friends of the Western Buddhist Order (FWBO).

1 The Teacher/Student relationship
2 Peer relationships
3 The Husband and Wife relationship
4 Notes and references
5 External links

[edit] The Teacher/Student relationship

In traditional schools of Buddhist thought, a spiritual friendship is a friendship not between one's peers, but a friendship between a student and their spiritual teacher. ^[2]

There is an account of a conversation between the Buddha and his disciple Ananda in which Ananda enthusiastically declares, 'Lord, this spiritual friendship, spiritual companionship and spiritual intimacy is no less than half of the spiritual life.' 'Say not so, Ananda,' the Buddha replied 'It is the whole, not the half of spiritual life.' ^[3]

From this, we can see that the Buddha believed it vital for spiritual growth to have a spiritual friend. This friendship is built on a deep respect for the teacher's knowledge and the student's potential, and, through this respect and friendship, the two individuals learn constructive behaviour. Constructive behaviour in Buddhism is act, think, and behave in a constructive way towards life, leading to personal happiness, and, then, to enlightenment.

[edit] Peer relationships

Spiritual friendships are important to building a bond between peers with in the Buddhist community.

Sangharakshita, the founder of the FWBO, says of Spiritual friendship:

He also (Sangharakshita) stresses the value of friendships with peers, in particular having at least one platonic friend with whom we can be intimate and completely frank. Through friendship we have the opportunity to develop the virtues of generosity, compassion, patience and forgiveness. ^[4]

It is believed that by having a group of peers as spiritual friends, we learn more about being good people than if we were in isolation.

[edit] The Husband and Wife relationship

The concept of Spiritual friendship is considered an important aspect of the husband and wife relationship within Buddhism. By forming a spiritual friendship with the partner, a couple not only shares love, but also common goals and ideals, which aid the pair in reaching a constructive relationship. This is much the same principal as the Teacher/Student spiritual friendship.