Seven Drunken Nights
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
"Seven Drunken Nights" is a humorous traditional Irish song, most famously performed by The Dubliners. It was based on an older ballad, Our Goodman (Child Ballad #274), sometimes called "Four Nights Drunk". Usually only five of the seven nights are sung because of the vulgar nature of the final two. Each night is a verse, followed by a chorus, in which the narrator comes home in a drunken state to find evidence of another man having been with his wife, which she explains away, not entirely convincingly.
Contents |
[edit] Lyrics of the song
[edit] Nights 1-5
On the first, night (generally Monday), the narrator sees a strange horse outside the door:
- As I went home on Monday night as drunk as drunk could be,
- I saw a horse outside the door where my old horse should be.
- Well, I called me wife and I said to her: "Will you kindly tell to me
- Who owns that horse outside the door where my old horse should be?"
His wife tells him it is merely a sow, a gift from her mother:
- "Ah, you're drunk, you're drunk, you silly old fool, still you can not see
- That's a lovely sow that me mother sent to me."
In each verse the narrator notices a flaw in each explanation, but seems content to let the matter rest:
- Well, it's many a day I've travelled a hundred miles or more,
- But a saddle on a sow sure I never saw before.
There is a popular audience participation section when the song is sung in a pub setting. After the man says "I called my wife and said to her" the male members of the audience say "Hey wife, you bitch" to which the female members reply "Whaddaya want you drunken asshole" (or, more innocuously, "Hey, wife!" and "Whaddya want, you drunken bum?!").
The next four nights involve a coat (actually a blanket according to the wife, upon which he notices buttons), a pipe (a tin whistle, filled with tobacco), two boots (flower pots, with laces), and finally, this being the last verse often sung, a head peering out from beneath the covers. Again his wife tells him it is a baby boy, leading to the retort "a baby boy with his whiskers on sure I never saw before." Each new item appearing in the house is said to be a gift from the wife's mother.
There also is an alternate version of the lyrics that are as followed:
"The first night I came home so drunk I couldn't see. Saw a horse in the stable, where my horse ought to be. Come here me wife, me darlin' wife explain this thing to me. Whose horse is that in the stable, where my horse ought to be?" This version has a more Irish sound to it.
[edit] Nights 6-7
The final two verses are not often sung, generally considered too raunchy, and due to their rarity several different versions have circulated. Verse six sometimes keeps the same story line, in which two hands appear on the wife's breasts. The wife, giving the least likely explanation yet, tells him that it is merely a nightgown, though the man notices that this nightgown has fingers.
Another version exists with a slight twist. The man sees a man coming out the door at a little after 3:00, this time the wife saying it was an English tax collector that the Queen sent. The narrator, now wise to what is going on, remarks: "Well, it's many a day I've travelled a hundred miles or more, but an Englishman who can last til three, I've never seen before." While this departs noticeably from the standard cycle, the twist is slightly more clever, and takes a jab at the English (a popular ploy in some Irish songs). As this sort of wraps up the story, it is usually sung as the last verse, be it the sixth or seventh.
Probably the most common version of the seventh verse involves the man seeing a "thing" in her "thing", or in "the bed", where his "thing" should be. Again his wife is ready with an answer, that it is a tin whistle, upon which the narrator remarks "...hair on a tin whistle sure I never saw before." At other times the "thing" involved is said to be a candle (in which case she doesn't recycle an excuse from an earlier night). The narrator this time remarks that he had never before seen a pair of balls on a candle. In a still less ambiguous version, it is the first time that our hero has observed "bollocks on a rolling pin".
Of course, the song leaves much unexplained, such as what happens when the man sobers up, and can tell what the items actually are, or if they're gone, notice their disappearance (particularly in verse five). Nor how he can notice a man's "thing", but not the man himself.
Another little known version for Sunday night is "that's a carrot that my mother sent to me", with the final observation being "a carrot with its onions on, I've never seen before".
Another Version is "It's Only Just A Rollin' Pin Me Mother Sent To Me" with the man saying "A Rollin' Pin With A Head Like That I've Never Seen Before"
Yet another version is "'tis nothin' but a hammer that me mother sent to me", with the man noticing "a hammer with a head like that, I never before did see"
Perhaps the best, and most accurate version of Sunday is:
- As I came home on Sunday night,
- As drunk as drunk could be.
- I saw a thing in my wife's thing
- Where my old thing should be.
- So I says to me wife,the curse of me life,
- Would you kindly tell to me,
- Who owns that thing inside your thing,
- Where my old thing should be?
- "Oh, you're drunk, you're drunk,
- You silly old fool,
- Can't you plainly see?
- This isn't your house, I'm not your wife,
- You've NEVER lived with me...
- Well many's the day I've traveled
- A hundred miles or more
- It's five times that I've stuffed this bird,
- And she never complained before!
[edit] "Four Nights Drunk"
Another, more up-tempo, version of the song, "Four Nights Drunk" relates the same overall story, albeit abbreviated. The four nights follow the same pattern as the first nights of "Seven Drunken Nights", with a horse and boots appearing, followed by a hat, and then skipping to the strange man, again dismissed as a baby. This song was recorded by Steeleye Span on their album Ten Man Mop, or Mr. Reservoir Butler Rides Again. They use a different air for the song, more precisely a reel named "The Primerose Lasses".
