Wikipedia:Peer review/Caterham CSR
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[edit] Caterham CSR
Hi, I've basically written this whole article, so I'm sure it suffers from a very distinct personal writing style. If anyone can pick up on some of those and provide alternatives, that would be great. Also, I'm wondering if I should even have comparisons to other sports cars. On the one hand, it detracts from the topic of the article, but on the other hand, it puts it into better perspective. Thoughts? Since I built one of these cars, I have a bunch more pictures that I can add, so if there's a section that you think needs a picture, please request it. Thanks, Riguy talk/contribs 09:11, 23 December 2006 (UTC)
- My principal gripe about the article (not the car -- I've always had a desire to at least drive one of these things since I saw one on The Prisoner while still an impressionable child) is that you add the page titles or document titles whenever you supply a URL in your references. It may be my own very distinct personal style, but seeing a bare URL without any external clue what it is linking to looks a little too amateurish, even for Wikipedia. -- llywrch 22:25, 24 December 2006 (UTC)
- OK Thanks. I'm a little confused what you mean. Do you mean all the references how they are simply URL's and that the external links section simply has the page titles? Also, I'm not entirely sure how to change references. I'm still a little new to Wikipedia, so I'm still trying to wrap my head around all the coding stuff. Thanks for your help. Riguy talk/contribs 22:47, 24 December 2006 (UTC)
- I made a few edits to your footnotes (specifically #11 & #12) to show you what I was talking about. Having given this article a second look, I'll add another suggestion: you may want to removed the sub-section headers from the "Improvements" section: having headers followed by single paragraphs is not good style. -- llywrch 22:23, 27 December 2006 (UTC)
- OK, thanks for your help. I'll update all the footnotes sometime in the future. I suppose I'll just combine all the paragraphs under "Inprovements" into one section without subsections as well. Do you think I should apply for "good article" status yet? Thanks, Riguy talk/contribs 01:39, 30 December 2006 (UTC)
- I made a few edits to your footnotes (specifically #11 & #12) to show you what I was talking about. Having given this article a second look, I'll add another suggestion: you may want to removed the sub-section headers from the "Improvements" section: having headers followed by single paragraphs is not good style. -- llywrch 22:23, 27 December 2006 (UTC)
- OK Thanks. I'm a little confused what you mean. Do you mean all the references how they are simply URL's and that the external links section simply has the page titles? Also, I'm not entirely sure how to change references. I'm still a little new to Wikipedia, so I'm still trying to wrap my head around all the coding stuff. Thanks for your help. Riguy talk/contribs 22:47, 24 December 2006 (UTC)
The following suggestions were generated by a semi-automatic javascript program, and might not be applicable for the article in question.
- Consider adding more links to the article; per Wikipedia:Manual of Style (links) and Wikipedia:Build the web, create links to relevant articles.[?]
- Per Wikipedia:Context and Wikipedia:Manual of Style (dates), months and days of the week generally should not be linked. Years, decades, and centuries can be linked if they provide context for the article.[?]
- Per Wikipedia:What is a featured article?, Images should have concise captions.[?]
- Per Wikipedia:Manual of Style (numbers), there should be a non-breaking space -
between a number and the unit of measurement. For example, instead of 50 lbs, use 50 lbs, which when you are editing the page, should look like: 50 lbs.[?] - Per Wikipedia:Manual of Style (numbers), please spell out source units of measurements in text; for example, the Moon is 380,000 kilometres (240,000 mi) from Earth.[?] Specifically, an example is 50 lbs.
- When writing standard abbreviations, the abbreviations should not have a 's' to demark plurality (for example, change kms to km and lbs to lb).
- Watch for redundancies that make the article too wordy instead of being crisp and concise. (You may wish to try Tony1's redundancy exercises.)
- While additive terms like “also”, “in addition”, “additionally”, “moreover”, and “furthermore” may sometimes be useful, overusing them when they aren't necessary can instead detract from the brilliancy of the article. This article has 17 additive terms, a bit too much.
- As done in WP:FOOTNOTE, footnotes usually are located right after a punctuation mark (as recommended by the CMS, but not mandatory), such that there is no space in between. For example, the sun is larger than the moon [2]. is usually written as the sun is larger than the moon.[2][?]
- Please ensure that the article has gone through a thorough copyediting so that it exemplifies some of Wikipedia's best work. See also User:Tony1/How to satisfy Criterion 1a.[?]
You may wish to browse through User:AndyZ/Suggestions for further ideas. Thanks, SenatorsTalk | Contribs 05:42, 10 January 2007 (UTC)
