User:PeadarMaguidhir
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I--a direct descendant of Barnabas the Barmy--am a frightfully cranky old man, who lives outside Paris. Unlike some, I have absolutely no problem with my hosts, the French. My only wish for them is that they receive the inspiration that will induce them to flush the toilet after urinating.
Although born in Dublin, I was educated at Coláiste Éinde, Gaillimh (where men from Aran and Connemara taught me to speak fluent West of Ireland Irish--much now forgotten); at Trinity College, Dublin; and at Temple University, Philadelphia. When I was young, Connemara, in particular Rosmuc, was my second home.
When others of my age were listening to pop-music, I was listening to the lore of Connemara, from toothless old men and women on the elegy-inspiring Connemara seaboard. I also learned much of the lore of Dublin from my favorite uncle, the late Liam Pollard, when we stopped on Friday evenings for a jar at a pub whose name I cannot mention; suffice it to so that that the establishment did not then have beer on draught--no "plain," or "plain porter" to borrow the phrase used by Buck Mulligan in "The Ballad of Joking Jesus" (Ulysses) or later used by Flann O'Brien in "A Pint of Plain is your Only Man!" (At Swim-Two-Birds).
I have a wife (a French lady) and a 10 year-old daughter, named for a famous piece of music; but contrary to my pre-paternal expectations, this does not always lead to harmonious patterns of behaviour. In fact, sometimes, I would like to throttle her. However, my mother tells me not to feel guilty about this emotion, as she often felt like throttling me!
My interests include literature, written in both Irish and English; cultural nationalism; the late Jimmy Joyce; and also the history of the dear land of my birth. I dislike "Celtic Tigers," even if I recognize that they have enabled the Irish to emerge from centuries of misery. But my real favorite hate is paddy-whackery in all its forms (especially when exploited by the Irish themselves to promote the sacrosanct Irish Tourist Trade): shillelaghs, leprechauns, people who say "St. Paddy's Day," people who dress up in green, the CIA joke (Catholic, Irish Alcoholic)...
I do believe in scholarship. I used to believe that the people about whom the most rubbish was written were the Celts. Now, however, pride of place has been taken by an eclectic mishmash made up of the sex life of Jesus the Nazarene; the Cathars (who apparently had no sex life); and the Knights Templar (whose sex lives were, by all accounts, curious); all bubbling merrily away in the Holy Grail.
My most time-consuming pastime is listening to the sound of my own voice. Only one man on the planet can make me shut up: my dentist. He tells me to open my mouth and then, he puts a drill in it.
My favorite occupation is filling my few remaining marbles with all and any useless information (it must be useless to qualify). I fill my noodle with information on every subject under the sun, with the exception of sports. I like being right about any matter; but more, I like being told I'm right!--PeadarMaguidhir 10:08, 30 June 2006 (UTC)
