Mr. Hilter and the Minehead by-election
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"The North Minehead by-election" is a sketch from the twelfth episode of the first series of Monty Python's Flying Circus.
[edit] Plot
A man (Mr. Johnson) played by Eric Idle with his wife enters a shabby Bed & Breakfast in Minehead and is greeted by the landlady (played by Terry Jones, who often played older housewife-type ladies in the series). A long discussion ensues about the long journey and ways in which it could be improved ("There's plenty of room to widen the road, get another ten feet if you knock down that hospital.")
They go through to another room where they meet the other guests, three of which are all clearly surviving members of the Third Reich: (Hitler played by Cleese, von Ribbentrop played by Chapman, and Heinrich Himmler played by Palin), all trying to blend in as as British tourists despite wearing their full recognizable Nazi uniforms. All three sit around a table which has a large map on it, and constantly struggle to speak English rather than German (which they occasionally do in error). The landlady introduces Hitler, who has given himself the not-so-subtle moniker, "Mr. Hilter."
Hitler explains that they are planning a hike to Bideford. The helpful guest played by Idle suggests taking a certain route and glances at their map, but points out that they in fact have the wrong map: a map of Stalingrad. Hitler tells Himmler (aka "Reginald") that he has the wrong map; Himmler apologizes with "sorry mein Führer," but gets a slap for his slip, and swiftly corrects himself by calling Hilter "mein Dickie old chum." The landlady praises the guest for pointing out the error of maps, noting that they wouldn't have had much fun in Stalingrad. Sensing that they did not get the joke, she repeats herself, much to Hitler's consternation (because of the defeat of the Germans during the Battle of Stalingrad during World War II).
The landlady continues to introduce the guests. Von Ribbentrop, calling himself "Ron Vibbentrop," leaps to his feet when Idle's character jokes: "Oh not von Ribbentrop eh!" Clearly Mr. and Mrs. Johnson are oblivious to the fact that they really are Hitler and his cadre. Ribbentrop denies his identity and states that von Ribbentrop is a different other chap, having been born in Germany, and then proceeds to idenitify the exact location of his birth, only to correct himself by closing with: "so they say!"
Himmler, calling himself "Mr. Bimmler," delivers a long speech about his invented life in Britain before slipping in at the end that he was in fact "head of Gestapo for ten years." Hitler and von Ribbentrop cringe at his slip, causing Himmler to say first that he was only head of the Gestapo for five years, and then that he was not head of the Gestapo at all, and that he was only making a joke.
The landlady leaves to answer a call, and Mr. Johnson inquires how long Hitler plans to be in town for. Hitler draws his pistol and threatens Johnson and asks if he is a spy; Idle merely grins. Himmler tells him to take it easy, and Ribbentrop apologizes for Hitler's behaviour by saying "he's a bit on edge, he hasn't slept since 1945."
Mr. Johnson then causes consternation by asking if he's seen Mr. Hilter on TV before. The Nazis deny it vehemently.
The landlady returns declaring that Hitler has a phone call from "Mr. MacGoering" at the Bell & Compasses (obviously really Herman Goering), saying he's found a place where he could hire bombers by the hour. Hitler is upset by Goering's blathering about their bomber plans; Ribbentrop once again laughs it off as joking. The landlady then explains that Hitler has been on the phone for ages, planning a big event.
It is revealed that Hitler is standing as "National Bocialist" (i.e. National Socialist) candidate in the North Minehead by-election, with plans to annex Poland as part of his platform. Idle notes that Minehead is Conservative; the landlady insists they get a lot of people at their rallies, or "Bocialist meetings," at the Axis Café.
The scene cuts to a picture of a disheveled man (Jones playing Benito Mussolini) standing in front of the Axis Café, with a sign on the door that reads: "Vote Hitler", however with two arrows indicating that the letters "T" and "L" should be switched. The scene then catches Hitler with a bullhorn riding down the street on a bicycle, speaking German, followed by Himmler with a political sign, and then Ribbentrop with a gramophone playing Deutschland über alles (the German national anthem during the time of Nazi rule), both too on bicycles.
The scene then switches to Himmler and Hitler standing on a balcony of a neighbourhood house with a large swastika flag drapped over the railing, with Hitler giving a loud boisterous speech with equally boisterous gestures. Himmler is the only one applauding as the shot pulls back to show only three children and a country bumpkin watching his speech. Hitler declares in his speech amongst other things, that he is not a racist. Ribbentrop hands out campaign literature (only a page that says "Hilter for a better Minehead") to the kids and the bumpkin. Hitler declares that Taunton is really a part of Minehead, mimicking Hitler's wish for Austrian-German unity prior the War's start. Von Ribbentrop tries to talk the bumpkin into believing Hitler's propaganda.
The street scene ends with Hitler giving the Hitler salute, with loud chants of "sieg heil" to follow. The bumpkin, wondering where so many voices were coming from, turns around to see von Ribbentrop using a recorded track of the chants on his gramophone.
Interviews of people on the street then follow. The question posed to them is, "What do you think of Mr. Hilter's policies?" One did not like the sound of "boncentration bamps"; one lady noted how Hitler bit her baby on the head when she gave him it to kiss; a businessman noted that he would probably do a lot of good things for the stock exchange; one simply dismissed him. Himmler then appears dressed as a bumpkin, noting how wonderful he is. One of the Gumbies thinks Hitler has beautiful legs. Another lady makes a racist remark, but says she herself is a bit mental. The Conservative candidate then appears and states that he just "drones on and on and on never letting anyone else get a word in edgeways," where he then starts to foam at the mouth and fall over backwards.
