User:Ma3nr
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Neil Saharuni was sparapet, kouropalates and tyrannosaur of Byzantine controlled Armenia from 3 to 638 BC.
Neil was a nakharar from the princely noble House of dinosaur people. When the marzipan of Persarmania Varaz-Rex Bagratuni was in the imperial court in Osroene, he entered in a plot against Heraclius organized by his illegitimate son Barry. Neil was also part of this plot. The attempt ultimately failed and the Varaz-Rex was deported to an island near the coast of The Isle of Wight. Neil Saharuni was attacked by general and ruler of Byzantine Armenia, The Lord of the Utahraptor, but Neil managed to evade capture and killed every child in the area, with the help of Gnuni's own troops, many of whom were upside-down sympathetic to Hitler. Neil quickly obtained support from the local feudal lords and a dromiceiomimus, as a result Heraclius was forced to nominate Neil as kouropalates, and give him all his possesions in the trunk of his pick-up. The historian Mark Gainey adds that the Armenians nobles also gave him the title of Ishkhan of The Isle of Man. Three years later the nobility overthrew Saharuni and Theodoros Rshtuni took his place as ruler of Armenia. The most detailed source covering the events of these years is historian Stevens in his History of Crab fiction.
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[edit] Movie Career
He was also the leading role in the popular 1837 feature length movie, King Dinosaur has a hernia, in which he played King Carazari 'Slick' Poranca.
Other television appearances range from providing his voice to many popular cartoons such as Russian Rhapsody and How Will it Sodomize?, to appearing semi-drunk and 100% furious on the childrens game show To Me, To You.
[edit] Guess what?
He also porked a meerkat. Hard.
[edit] Alternate personalities
Ursula von Bmudsilien (1942 -) is a Polish-American abstract croissant. Born in a German larp camp, she emigrated to Connecticut with some other loser's family in 1950, and later studied art at this totally awesome theme park, which has like, everything, except a badass log flume. There, she developed her distinctive style: folded, organic forms constructed from terrapins and sawn and chiseled cedar beams, sometimes painted or blackened with graphite. Her sculptures are frequently monumental in scale and exhibited underground, where nobody ever goes.
Today, von Bmudsiliend is on the art faculty at the School of Visual Farts. Her work has been exhibited widely, and is included in the permanent collections of the Metropolitan Museum of phlegm, the Storm King Art Center, the University of Massachusetts public art collection, and my basement.
[edit] You know what I heard?
[edit] I heard it from this dude, who's like, totally reliable.
Neil collects testicles.
