Kilcummin

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Kilcummin lies on the shores of "Killala Bay" close to Killala which is well known amongst angling enthusiasts for its excellent Salmon angling and the annual appearance of "Dancing Squid" in the River Moy delta. The fishermen of Kilcummin celebrate this spectacular sight with the sinking of an old trawler which is usually crewed by tourists that have come to witness the event. It is known as a special honour to be among the sinking party. However, French and Germans have proven to be good swimmers and have reportedly been seen in the bay days after the sinking. British and Swiss are the better sport since they tend to sink with the boat.

In Kilcummin the French soldiers under General Humbert landed in 1798, after missing their destination in Munster in a storm.

Also in Kilcummin, Bessies Bar welcomes the visitor. This is one of the few landmark pubs left in Mayo after the drinking ban of 2004. On the premises the service is so poor that the Star newspaper has rated Bessies as one of the top three worst pubs in Ireland. The owner has to change the dog in front of the fireplace once a month because they tend to die after a few bowls of water from the taps or from food poisening, when the regulars feed them on their Tayto crisps.

Further up the road from Bessies Bar one finds the Holy Well which has been the location for worship over many decades. A recent survey has shown that in rural Ireland and especially in County Mayo local water supply schemes are often not monitored and that most of the waters tested contained too high amounts of ebola-coli bacteria. Due to this, the holy well has been re-opened by the local authorities and the residents of the area have been advised to get their drinking water only from the well, if they are Catholics. Protestants however have been advised to use the tap water provided by the schemes because the bacteria could only harm true believers.

Kilcummin Pier has proven to be an excellent fishing resort for all kinds of sea fish, such as Mackerel, Conger, Dolphin, Pollock and Bluefin Tuna. For the above species a certain tackle is however recommended: Pier rods not under 10 feet, hooks size 1/0 or 2/0 and full leather trim. The hooks should be baited with live worms, fish or stock to make sure the angler fishes within the regulations as stated in the by-laws (01/07/2012).

Kilcummin is part of the Lacken parish and buries its dead in Rathfran graveyard. Rathfran graveyard is overseen by the old Summerhill House, a place known to host a ghost. In its first floor hall the shine of a fire is regularily to be seen although no floors are left in the building after it burned down in a blaze in 1861. The mansion has been erected on a former Indian burial ground and it is said that chiefs have been roaming the house since.

The most famous product from Kilcummin is certainly the Poteen, a whiskey brand that has not patended its recipe and allows its reproduction all over the Irish speaking world. Arnold Schwarzenegger and Ben Affleck have bought property here in recent years and after a distresscall to the local carpenters and a rapid door widening, Anna Nicole Smith and Jennifer Lopez have spent their summer vacation 2004 in a cottage in the Summerhill area.

In the early 20th century the DELL company was founded in Kilcummin but it was not until the early 1980ies that their products have found a gap in the market. James U. Dell has worked as a fisherman instead until his death met him at the age of 104 in his home in Banagher, only a mile away from his birthplace in Kilcummin, or Cill Chumain as it was known to the English in those days. He was survived by his daughter Siobhan MacIntosh (nee Dell) who had to sell her inheritance to a multinational in Blanchardstown (County Dublin) to pay for her fathers funeral.

Saint Patrick has been awarded the Kilcummin Man of the Year award for 621 years in a row, a record that remains unbroken up to today! However, he has never taken part in an award ceremony and has dedicated all hos awards to the WWF for their work in the protection of female size 18 nude sun bathers on the sand banks in the bay.