User:K3vin/sandbox
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{{inuse}}
=Future Santa= Image:Uncyclopedia:Future santa tech.GIF [1] The Santa Claus existing outside the realm of time as we know it. He travels
between the fabric of years, righting wrongs, wronging rights, or whatever
he sees fit to do.
Contents |
[edit] Everyday is Christmas Eve
From our perspective, every day can be Christmas Eve, due to the nature of
time itself!. Many children have wondered how Santa could deliver gifts
to the entire Christian world in one night. Many so called experts of their
time, conjectured it had something to do with slowing the rotation of the
earth, and moving in the same direction as the rotation. It is now known
that it was actually Future Santa moving his other incarnations back and
forth to accomplish the task each "year". Each annual Santa had an infinite
amount of time to do his tasks, and Future Santa would be able to bring him
back to his next stop on each and every Christmas Eve. If li'l Johnny had to
get him some more milk, this was not the irrevocable delay that many
children feared. Future Santa would just calibrate his time travel device to
the next stop at the appointed time.
[edit] Mischief Making and Mirth
The tradtional jolly old elf, of Clement Moore's biography, never lost the
boyish penchant for mischief. Most of the anachronisms found in the world's
timeline can be traced to that Merry Making. One such well documented
incident is when Future Santa took Future Churchill back in time and re-did
the whole D-Day event so that the Allies won with their regular troopforce
in addition to card board tanks and pastboard foot lockers. This, royally
pissed off Future Hitler, in that he had to give up his bragging rights over
Future Charlemagne.
[edit] The Japanese
Longtime time travelers themselves, the Japanese witnessed another act o'
merry making mischief by Future Santa. They witnessed his visit to the
original Jesus nativity, they were awestruck when the found the entire
tableau dressed in the coloful Red and White fur suits of the CocaCola
Company. Eager to commemerate it, when they returned to their own time,
they released a manger set with the players in Santa suits. Future Santa
was furious, and threw their juggernaut economy into depression and is now
working to destroy every existing Santa Nativity set. This has caused the
set to be a cult favorite among collectors. It is a cross-collectible
appealing to both Santa Collectors and Time Anachronysm collectors.
[edit] Future Santa and his Future Pals
Future Santa has been around, among his future pals are Future Jesus, Future
Churchill and Future Holly Hobby. Noteable first contact with [[Jesus
Christ]] was back in year 33ce when Future Santa started to materialize
within the body of Christ. Japanese Time Tourists snapped a rare photo of
the phenomenon.
[edit] Santa's pals
- Santa's Future elves
- Mrs. Future Claus
- Frosty The Snowman
- Future Arnold Schwarzenegger
- Future Charlemagne
[edit] How time travel works
Template:Censored
This page is censored by the Time-Shire-Reeves.
Other Santacarnations
- Santa Claus
- Robo Santa - stub
- Santa Clause - stub
- Satan Claus
- Secret Santa
[edit] see also
- Christmas Island
- Santaists
- Santa and the Prostitute
- Santa Claus is Coming To Town
![[1]](http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Image:Future_santa_tech.GIF){kind=link}