Hindu wedding

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Hindu wedding (panigrahana पाणिग्रहण in Sanskrit, other terms are also used) ceremonies are traditionally conducted in Sanskrit, the language in which most holy Hindu ceremonies are conducted. They have many rituals that have evolved since traditional times and differ in many ways from the modern western wedding ceremony and also among the different regions and castes such as Rajput Wedding, Aggarwal Weddings, Brahmanical Weddings. The Hindus attach a lot of importance to weddings and the ceremonies are very colourful and extend for several days. By the Hindu Marriage Act of 1955 passed by the Union Parliament of India, for all legal purposes, all Hindus of any caste, creed or sect, Sikh, Budhhists and Jains are considered as Hindus for the sake of the Hindu marriage Act—and can hence intermarry. By the Special Marriage Act, 1954, a Hindu can marry with a non-Hindu employing any ceremony provided certain legal conditions are fulfilled.

The pre-wedding ceremonies include engagement (involving vagdana or oral agreement and lagna-patra written declaration), and arrival of the marriage party at the brides residence, often in the form of a marriage procession. The post-marriage ceremonies involve welcoming the bride to her new home.

An important thing to note is that despite the fact that the modern Hinduism is based on the puja form of the worship of devas as enshrined in the Puranas, a Hindu marriage ceremony is essentially a Vedic yajña (a fire-sacrifice), in which the Aryan deities are invoked in the archaic Indo-Aryan style. The primary witness of a Hindu marriage is the fire-deity (or the Sacred Fire) Agni, and by law and by tradition, no Hindu marriage is deemed complete unless in the presence of the Sacred Fire, seven encirclements have been made around it by the bride and the groom together.

Contents

[edit] Important Marriage ceremonies

The Hindu marriage ceremonies vary in different regions and according to family traditions. The major ceremonies are the following.

  • Ganesh Pūja - Invoking Lord Ganesh
  • Agni Puja - Evoking the holy fire
  • Kanyādāna - Giving away the bride to the groom
  • Mangalsutra - Tying of holy necklace
  • Saptapadi - The Seven Holy Steps circling the fire
  • Śilārōhana - Bride steps on the stone

Many of the ceremonies involve the pandit (priest) chanting mantras of various prayers and blessings for the couple.

Though Mangalya dharanam (tying of the holy mangalsutra) is considered to be the important part of the marriage, the wedding is considered complete only after Saptapadhi. The hindu marriage ceremony consists of these major rituals as described below but every part of India have some variations in all the ceremonies. These are the main ceremonies but the explanation of these rituals here is typically North Indian or Punjabi style and are not the same for all Hindu marriages.

[edit] Saptapadi (स‌प्त‌पदी)

The bridegroom gets up from his seat holding his bride's right hand. He then goes around the Holy Fire (Agni) from the right side, by lifting his bride's right feet at each step. This is done for seven steps. With each step, he recites a mantra addressed to the bride with the following meaning.

- Let Lord Maha Vishnu follow each one of your steps for the following specific purposes. - :To give you unlimited food. - :To give you excellent health and energy. - :Todained in Vedas, during your life time. - :To give you happiness in life. - :To make your cows and good animals to grow in strength and in numbers. - :To make all the seasons be beneficial to you. - :To make the homams (sacrifices to be done in Holy Fire) to be performed by you in your life as ordained in Vedas, successful and free from hindrances. - - The idea behind this is to pray to Lord Vishnu, the protector of life, for his blessings in marital life. - - The groom then recites a mantra to convey the following meaning: - - After crossing seven steps with me thus, you should become my friend. I too have become your friend now. I will never discord this friendship and you should not also do that. Let us be together always. Let us resolve to do things in life in the same manner and tread the same path. Let us lead a life by liking and loving each other, having good heart and thoughts, and enjoying the food and our strong points together. Let us have undivided opinions. We will perform the vrithas united. Let us have same and joint desires. I will be Sama (one of the vedas); you will be Rig (another Veda). Let me be the Heaven; you be the Earth. Let me be the Shukla (Moon) and you be its wearer. Let me be the mind and you its spokesman (Vak). With these qualities, you be my follower. You the sweet tongued, come to me to get good male children and wealth. - - This is the short version of the saptapadi, though "Yalgnavakya Smrithi" gives a much longer version of actual exchange of vows between the groom and the bride.

[edit] Barni Bandhwana

Approximately 15 days prior to the actual wedding, on an auspicious day, the pandit will perform a puja to Lord Ganesh (the remover of obstacles). During this puja, a piece of mauli (thread) is tied to the hands of the groom, and his parents. This puja is done to make a humble request to Lord Ganesh that the wedding happen without any problems, beside the occasional mishap e.g tripping over. After that day, the family performs a puja to Lord Ganesh every day until after the wedding is complete.

[edit] Byaha Hath

These are ritualistic ceremonies signifying the cleansing of one's mind, body and soul before embarking on the path of marriage. This daytime ceremony prepares both of them for the nuptials. 'Uptan' is a paste made from sandalwood, turmeric and rose water and is applied by seven married female members of the families, to the faces, hands and feet of the bride and groom. After this ceremony the bride and the groom are barred from stepping outdoors until after the wedding ceremony.

[edit] Symbols

There are many symbols in a Hindu wedding, like, for example, the colour red which represents life. There are others like fire, a scarf which is tied around the bride and the groom to show that they have been united, and also the seven steps. These are just traditional things which Hindu's do at their weddings.

[edit] Mudda-Tikka

On an auspicious day, decided by an astrologer, the bride’s family call on the groom, taking with them, a platter filled with rice, jaggery, dry fruits, sweetmeats, and sometimes a garland for the 'tikka'. They also carry gifts for the groom, which may include clothes and other items.

[edit] Bari

The bride is considered to be a form of the goddess of wealth (Goddess Laxmi). As such, she always wears jewelry and is decorated with nice clothes. At this time, the groom’s parents gift the bride jewelry with this in mind.

[edit] Barna

The groom is considered to be a form of Lord Vishnu. As such, the parents of the bride come to the groom’s house.

The parents of the bride go to the groom’s house and perform a puja to Lord Ganesh. Then, considering the groom as a form of Lord Vishnu, they perform the puja of the groom’s feet. This is followed by gifting the groom clothes and tying a headdress on the groom.

[edit] Mayara

The mayara is an important ceremony, common to both the bride and the groom’s families. This ceremony is performed by the maternal uncle of the groom/bride, who, along with his wife and family, arrives with much fanfare, and is received by the bride/groom’s mother with the traditional welcome. The clothes that the uncle gives are then worn by the family during the wedding.

[edit] Sangeet Sandhya

The sangeet sandhya is an evening of musical entertainment. The groom’s family puts on a show for the groom and bride. Included as part of this event is an introduction of all the family members for the bride.

[edit] Tilak Ceremony (तिलक‌)

Tilak is a mark of auspiciousness. It is put on the forehead using Kumkum, a red turmeric powder. The male members of the bride's family, like her father, brother, uncles place a tilak on the forehead of the groom.

[edit] Mehendi Lagwana (मॆह्न्दी)

Another name for “Vivaah” is “haath pila karna” or simply translated, making hands yellow. Mehendi (henna) is applied to the bride’s hands and feet. In the right hand, a round spot is left open for Hathlewa.

[edit] Biradh Morcha

The groom’s family’s elder members go to the bride’s house. There Lord Krishna’s Deity is decorated and aarti is performed. This is ended by some hymns.

[edit] Barat Nikasi (बारात‌)

The groom leaves for the wedding venue riding a decorated horse or elephant. This is a very colorful and grand ceremony. The groom is dressed in a sherwani (long jacket) and 'churidars' (fitted trousers). On his head he wears a 'safa' (turban) with a 'kalgi' (brooch) pinned onto it.

Before he departs, his relatives apply the ceremonial 'tilak' on his forehead and his sister feeds the horse or elephant sweetened grain. The baraat is headed by the dancing of the congregated folks. Accompanied by the rhythm of the north Indian dholak the baraat reaches the place of the wedding.

Upon arriving at the venue of the wedding, the groom is welcomed by a welcome song. This is called “talota.” Then the groom knocks on the door with his sword and enters.

[edit] Var Mala (वर माला) / Jay Mala (जय माला)

The groom is led to a small stage where he is “attacked” by the bride with flowers. A close family member of the groom defends him with a shield. The bride does this while circling the groom four times. Following this, the groom and bride exchange garlands (these are the "var mala") signifying their acceptance of each other as husband and wife. Than, the groom’s mother-in-law measures the groom’s chest, and pokes and prods him to make sure he is tough enough to defend her daughter. She than puts kajal on the groom to ward off evil spirits. This is followed by aarti.

[edit] Aarti (आरती)

The 'baraatis' (groom's party) are received by the bride's family and at the entrance to the wedding venue. The bride's mother welcomes the groom by performing the 'aarti' (traditional Indian welcome ritual with a lamp or 'diya' placed on a platter or 'thali') to welcome her son-in-law and placing a tilak on his forehead.

[edit] Hathlewa (हाथलॆवा)

After being led to the wedding mandup, the bride and groom have their hands tied together. The Panditji does a puja to Lord Ganesh and than puts a coin & mehendi on the groom’s right hand where the round empty spot is (where no mehendi was put) and ties his hand with the brides. This puja is done schedule in advance based on an auspicious time & date.

[edit] Havan (हवन‌)

The ritual connotes the actual marriage, for the very meaning of the word "vivaah" is-marriage. The priest ties the end of the groom's dhoti or the kurta; whichever he is wearing, with that of the bride's saree, the knot signifying the sacred wedlock. The groom and the bride then circle the holy fire seven times, making seven promises to be fulfilled in the married life, after which they are considered to be 'married' to each other. This ritual is called "phere".

[edit] Saat Phere / Wedding Vows (सात फॆरॆ)

1. With the first step, the couple invokes the gods for plenty of pure and nourishing food. "With God as our guide, let us take the first step to live with honour and respect. Let us walk together so we get food," the couple prays.

2. With the second step, the couple prays to the Gods to give them the mental, physical and spiritual strength to lead a healthy life. "Let us be happy and enjoy life. Let us walk together so we grow together in strength," they pray.

3. The third step is for preserving wealth and prosperity in life. The chant at this stage means, "let us share joys and pains together. Let us walk together so we get wealth."

4. With the fourth step, the bride and groom invoke the gods for attainment of happiness and harmony by mutual love and trust in all walks of life. "Let us not forget parents and elders. Let us walk together so we get happiness by sharing our joys and sorrows," they say.

5. With the fifth step, they pray for the welfare of all living beings in the Universe and pray for virtuous, noble and heroic children." Let us observe all acts of charity. Let us walk together so we have family," the mantras say.

6. With the sixth step, they ask the gods to give them a long, joyous life and togetherness forever. "Let us live a long and peaceful life. Let us walk together so we have joy," the couple prays.

7. With the seventh, and last, step, the couple prays for understanding, companionship, loyalty and unity. "Let us be friends with love and sacrifice. Let us walk together so we have friendship," the holy chants signify.

8. After the seventh step, the groom says to the bride: "With seven steps we have become friends. Let me reach your friendship. Let me not be severed from your friendship. Let your friendship not be severed from me."


Only after the 7 steps, are the couple pronounced husband and wife.

[edit] Kanya Daan (क‌न्या दान)

Kana Danam is performed by the father of the bride in presence of a large gathering that is invited to witness the wedding.

The father pours out a libation of sacred water symbolizing the giving away of the daughter to the bride groom. The groom recites Vedic hymns to Kama, the God of love, for pure love and blessings.

As a condition for offering his daughter for marriage, the father of the bride requests a promise from the groom for assisting the bride in realizing the three ends : dharma, artha, and kama. The groom makes the promise by repeating three times that he will not fail the bride in realizing dharma, artha and kama.

[edit] Vidaai (विदाई)

This is considered to be the most emotional ritual, when the bride leaves her parents' home and makes her way to her husband's. Family and friends, who also shower her with blessings and gifts, give her a tearful farewell. The male members of the bride's family bid farewell to the groom by applying the traditional 'tilak' (vermilion) on his forehead and shower him with gifts.
In earlier times the bride use to leave in a palanquin. These days the couple leaves in a decorated car.

[edit] Baasi-Jawari

This event takes place the day after the wedding. The groom along with some friends and family (but not parents or people senior to him in relation) go to his father-in-law’s house where they eat lunch. During this time, the sisters of the bride will steal the groom’s shoes and demand a ransom. The groom’s company are responsible for preventing this from happening.

After this, the bride accompanies the groom back to the groom’s house.

[edit] Dwar-Rokai (द्वार रोकाई)

After leaving the groom’s father-in-law’s house, the couple come home. They are stopped at the entrance of the house by either the groom’s sister or his father’s sister. There, in an earthen vessel, the sister/aunt uses a mixture of salt and water to ward off evil spirits from the groom. After this, the pot is thrown on the ground and destroyed. After this, the couple enter the house.

[edit] Griha Pravesh

When the bride arrives at her new home, her mother-in-law, who welcomes her with the traditional 'Aarti’.. At the entrance, she puts her right foot onto a tray of vermilion powder mixed in water or milk, symbolizing the arrival of good fortune and purity. With both her feet now covered in the red powder paste, she kicks over a vessel filled with rice and coins to denote the arrival of fertility and wealth in her marital home.

[edit] Mooh Dikhai

The family now indulges in a series of games and post-wedding rituals, amidst much laughter to make the new member feel comfortable. One such ritual is the Mooh dikhai. Literally translated, Mooh Dikhai means 'show your face', but this is a ritual, which helps to introduce the newly wed to members of her husband's family! Each member of the groom's family comes in turn to make an acquaintance with the new bride.

[edit] Modern Hindu weddings

Modern Hindu weddings are often much shorter and do not involve all of the rituals of the traditional ceremony which sometimes were for five days. Instead certain ceremonies are picked by the families of the bride and the groom, depending on their family tradition, caste, jāti etc. Hence the ceremonies vary among the various ethnic groups that practice Hinduism. The wedding is normally conducted under a mandap, a canopy traditionally with four pillars, and an important component of the ceremony is the sacred fire (Agni) that is witness to the ceremony.

[edit] See also

[edit] External links

Matrimonial websites

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