Talk:Garment District, Manhattan
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[edit] Reads like a tourist brochure - and copied from one!
Two problems with this article. It reads like a tourist brochure. Perhaps because large pieces were copied from the NYC visitors guide, the first article in the reference list. Second, its blatantly POV in pieces: "The mob helped bump off a once vibrant industry." I cleanup up some, but a lot more work needs to be done. It should be possible to write about a neighborhood in an objective, original neutral point-of-view manner. Crunch 02:09, 10 March 2006 (UTC)
- Crunch, although I appreciate your comments and edits (and if you have more pls help make the article better), it is not fair to say "large pieces were copied from the NYC visitors guide" when in fact only one sentence was borrowed from that source. No doubt the article can be improved, but quite a bit of work did go into getting it this far - as can be seen from the list of references. Have a look at what the page looked like previously. Also, there are many sources for the mob's influence on this neighborhood, but I accept that perhaps that section could be written in a more neutral tone. Thanks. -- San 15:38, 12 March 2006 (UTC)
- Fair enough, San. My main concern is with the POV-ness of the article, not that it's copied from the tourist brochure. For example:
- "From the industry's most famous designers to its most promising entrepreneurs, fashion makers locate their businesses here, taking advantage of the city's unlimited creative resources." (hyperbole)
- "the United Hebrew Trades union asked Lepke Buchalter and his Jewish and Italian gangster friends..." (friend used incorrectly)
- "Factories and showrooms are increasingly becoming condos and Starbucks." ("condos and Starbucks" used to generalize in a way to mean, perhaps "high value real estate and chain retail." And, then, if that's the case, please explain the significane of that in the context of the article)
These are just some examples. Crunch 16:29, 12 March 2006 (UTC)