Fings Ain't Wot They Used T'Be

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Fings ain't wot they used t'be is a play with music, rather than a normal musical. The play, by Frank Norman, himself a Cockney, has music and lyrics by Lionel Bart, a Jew who also grew up on London's East End. It was initially produced by Joan Littlewood, at her Theatre Workshop, based in the Theatre Royal Stratford East. It subsequently played at the Garrick Theatre in London's West End, starting on 11 February 1960. It ran for about two years.

It was stated to be a Cockney Comedy. The dialogue is in the Cockney dialect with much rhyming slang and thieves' cant. Some audiences found it difficult to understand, and a list of more than a dozen phrases with standard English translations was supplied in the programme.

The characters in the play were a selection of the low-life of London; a collection of gamblers, spivs, prostitutes, Teddy boys & girls and some not-too-honest police. Only the title song, "Fings ain't wot they used t'be", was memorable and was recorded by Max Bygraves. The lead actors were Maurice Kaufmann, Wallas Eaton, Miriam Karlin, Barbara Windsor, Toni Palmer & Bryan Pringle.