Characters of 8-Bit Theater

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The events in the webcomic 8-Bit Theater center around four major characters — the Light Warriors — and a number of minor ones.

Spoiler warning: Plot and/or ending details follow.

Contents

[edit] The Light Warriors

[edit] Other main characters

These are mostly recurring characters who play a vital role to the overall story.

[edit] White Mage

White Mage.
White Mage.

First Appearance: Episode 024: "She's a White Magic Woman."[1]

A White Mage assigned to protect fate, she is on a mission to help the Light Warriors succeed in saving the world, apparently to accomplish her destiny. White Mage specializes in casting healing spells, which has compensated for the sheer incompetence of the Light Warriors on multiple occasions. There is ongoing tension with Black Mage's lustful attraction to her, usually resulting in her prompt violent responses (manifesting in hitting him with a large hammer), but she does show attraction to the more sensitive and compassionate part of his personality, which, however, only rarely emerges.

White Mage inadvertently created the Universe after being sent to the beginning of time by Sarda the Sage. After a discussion with the young Sarda billions of years ago, during which she convinced him to grow his trademark moustache, she has willed herself back to her own time.

[edit] Black Belt

Black Belt in his combat pose.
Black Belt in his combat pose.

First Appearance: Episode 074: Guest Appearances By...[2]

Black Belt was an extremely skilled martial artist whose sense of directional orientation was all but non-existent. As a result, he was capable of defying the laws of physics by misunderstanding them. At least twice, this has led to warping the fabric of space, once even creating a second version of himself (which was promptly turned to stone by Black Mage). His powers of misunderstanding also rendered him capable of Munchhausenesque feats, such as walking across a pit on a rope that had been untied at both ends. Black Belt was assigned to guard White Mage on her mission, but was later killed when he attacked Kary, the Fiend of Fire, in Gurgu Volcano.

Black Belt's teachers (who have color palettes identical to Ken and Ryu from the Street Fighter video game series) identify the fighting style they and Black Belt use as Wu Xia. Black Belt himself described the prevailing theory of his school as the credo that an opponent who is too broken to move is an opponent who is defeated.

According to Clevinger, Black Belt is permanently dead; even so, many fans apparently had a hard time accepting this and came up with various theories how Black Belt could be revived, the most persistent of which was bringing the stone Black Belt back to life. In a later episode, the aptly titled "Now shut up", [3] White Mage did, indeed, try this; however, the top of Black Belt's head had eroded away by then and he merely turned into a (very briefly) living blood fountain, later given a proper burial by White Mage.

[edit] Matoya

Matoya.
Matoya.

First Appearance: Episode 172: The Inhabitant of the Cave[4]

Matoya is a blind witch who sends the Light Warriors on a side-quest to regain her magic eye after feeding them poisoned nightmare-inducing cookies, promising them an antidote if they return with it. Due to her poor hearing, she also grants Fighter the Armoire of Invincibility, instead of the Armor of Invincibility Fighter actually desired. She is almost as greedy as Thief and once almost tricked Thief into paying her the entire kingdom of Elfland in return for his father's cure. Matoya has a romantic relationship with Bahamut, much to the disgust of the Light Warriors.

[edit] Sarda the Sage

Sarda showing "the face of magic."
Sarda showing "the face of magic."

First Appearance: Episode 300: The House Always Wins[5]

Sarda is the self-proclaimed Wizard Who Did It (in reference to the common fantasy novel and televised cop out, "A wizard did it" to explain any mistakes as far as details and continuity) and sole occupant of the Circle Cave. Sarda has played a vital role in the story as he drives the Light Warriors to recover the Four Orbs, often using forceful means; to what purpose is unknown, though saving the world and stopping Chaos is the assumed goal. Sarda is an all-powerful wizard who, among other things, can reverse and stop time, as well as manipulate reality itself. He will readily do so out of sheer boredom or just to irritate others (Black Mage refers to him as an "omnipotent jackass," to which he does not object). For example, humanity used to have 36-hour days, but Sarda reduced them to 24 just to make everyone hurry up. He also has a "spellcasting pose" that the Light Warriors have come to recognize. He never stops to think about the consequences of his actions, citing that he wouldn't be the Wizard Who Did It if he did.

Billions of years ago, Sarda planned to be the original creator of the Universe, but found out that White Mage had already set the Universe in motion. Sarda was forced to remain in the vacuum of space for billions of years until the Earth formed. He spent this time formulating a plan to stop White Mage from reaching the beginning of the Universe. Billions of years in the future, the now-mustached Sarda sends White Mage to a pocket dimension immediately upon meeting her - unknown to him, this pocket dimension was the Universe before creation.

[edit] Bahamut

Bahamut, God-King of Dragons, while in 8-bit form.
Bahamut, God-King of Dragons, while in 8-bit form.

First Appearance: Episode 569: What Dragon?

Bahamut is the God-King of Dragons. He offered to give the Light Warriors "the power of self-realization and the power that comes with it" in exchange for the tail of the dreaded Dire Rat. When the Light Warriors brought him such a tail from the Castle of Ordeals, he granted their Class Changes. It later turned out that the reason Bahamut desired a rat tail was that rat tail soup is a potent virility drug, to be concocted by his girlfriend, Matoya.

[edit] Major Enemies

[edit] The Dark Warriors

These are major enemies the Light Warriors have defeated separately in the past who teamed up to take revenge. With the exception of Drizz'l, they are based on enemies from the game; Drizz'l is the son of Astos, who is based on a game character, as well.

Garland

Garland, leader of the Dark Warriors.
Garland, leader of the Dark Warriors.

First Appearance: Episode 052: Meanwhile...[6]

Garland is the first major enemy faced by the Light Warriors. Despite his impressive attempts to become an evil villain, he is a nice and caring person who enjoys cooking. He treated the Light Warriors more like guests rather than prisoners during their imprisonment in his castle and ended up being assisted by his prisoner, Princess Sara. After his first failed encounter with the Light Warriors, he formed the Dark Warriors and began a propaganda campaign against the Light Warriors. After some time as the Dark Warriors' leader, he has shown a more calculating side to him while retaining his friendly personality. He sees the faults of the other Dark Warriors and is able to prevent a mutiny incited by Bikke. Garland is continually wrestling with his fear of Forest Imps (the weakest creatures in the world) and has the ability to summon huge creatures, including a giant squid, a dinosaur and a really big marmoset; his original plan was even to summon Chaos himself.

Bikke the Pirate

"The Claw".
"The Claw".

First Appearance: Episode 208: Look Who's Back[7]

Bikke is a hopelessly incompetent and dim-witted pirate captain and the second member of the Dark Warriors. He is known for his intense body odor and his tendency to speak in a clichéd pirate accent. Bikke managed to let his entire crew almost die from scurvy, due to feeding them nothing but Cheetos, which led directly to his defeat. Although he is a pirate captain, he cannot swim and, despite having two perfectly normal, functional hands, desires to be called "The Claw".

Prince Drizz'l, Clan of the Dark Elves

Drizz'l, Prince of the Dark Elves.
Drizz'l, Prince of the Dark Elves.

First Appearance: Episode 268: Out on a Web[8]

Drizz'l, a Dark Elf and the son of King Astos, is the third member of the Dark Warriors. His name, a parody of the name of Drizzt Do'Urden, roughly translates from Elven into "The Relentless Scourge." Drizz'l is a sword master equal to Fighter and controlled a pack of giant spiders before he was defeated by the Light Warriors in Marsh Cave. His sword skills are severely impacted by the fact that Fighter took away his swords after he was defeated. Drizz'l considers himself the most intelligent of the Dark Warriors, although his inherent Elven arrogance often gets the better of him.

Vilbert von Vampire

Vilbert von Vampire.
Vilbert von Vampire.

First Appearance: Episode 366: Evil Has a Name[9]

Vilbert, the son of Lich, is a vampire and the fourth member of the Dark Warriors. Prior to meeting the Light Warriors, Vilbert lived in the basement of his parents' house, where he indulged in his hobbies: writing clichéd goth poetry, live action role-playing (on a level of fanaticism similar to Red Mage's) and being misunderstood. Like any other vampire, he can only be killed with a wooden stake. In an attempt to kill him, the Light Warriors drove an armoire (the "Armoire of Invincibility") through most of his vital organs. He later recovered and joined the Dark Warriors.

[edit] King Astos of the Dark Elves

First Appearance: Episode 245: Wheels Within Wheels

Astos, originally a boss in the first Final Fantasy game, is the father of Drizz'l. He planned to drive Elfland into a civil war by overthrowing the currently ruling Elven clan, using the alias "Chancellor Usurper of Clan Sahn'ta" to get close to the king and Prince Elf (Thief). He had the king poisoned and put into a coma to this end.

In a stroke of luck, Thief and the Light Warriors overheard Astos dictating his plot to himself. The next day, the Light Warriors confronted Astos. They never got around to an epic battle, however, as Astos was killed by a bad pun from Black Mage. He turned out to carry both Matoya's Crystal Eye and the formula for an antidote for the Elven King.

[edit] The Fiends

The Fiends are evil elemental beings, far stronger than regular monsters. They guard the orbs the four elements are tied to. All three Fiends that have so far appeared in the comic have violently attacked a main character, often making readers believe they died or actually killing them.

In the Final Fantasy video game, the Fiends served as major bosses. They consisted of Lich (Earth), Kary (Fire), Kraken (Water) and Tiamat (Air). Kraken has appeared as an ancient God-like being known also as Ur, while Tiamat has not yet appeared in the comic.

Lich von Vampire, Fiend of Earth

Lich, Fiend of Earth.
Lich, Fiend of Earth.

First Appearance: Episode 380: Introducing...

Lich is an undead, immortal wizard and self-proclaimed "Master Bonecraftsman" who believes all things live to die and that the dead live to serve him.

Lich confronted the Light Warriors after they defeated his son, Vilbert. He killed Black Mage by breaking his spine. Afterwards, he easily stopped multiple attempts by Fighter to kill him, as he had put his soul into the Earth Orb, rendering him immortal. Thief "stole" his soul out of the Earth Orb, the Light Warriors managed to get Lich's soul back into him and Black Mage, who emerged as the ruler of Hell, banished Lich to the underworld. However, Lich revived the minions of Hell, whom Black Mage had incapacitated by removing their spines, and ousted Black Mage from his position. Lich's departing words were a direct quote from Ghostbusters 2. Lich was last seen together with Kary, greeting Kraken as he entered Hell.

Kary, Fiend of Fire

Kary, Fiend of Fire.
Kary, Fiend of Fire.

First Appearance: Episode 466: Trigger Happy

Kary is a fiend who enjoys indiscriminately killing people via combustion, feeling it's the only way to prove she's evil. However, she overdoes it and ends up killing all her minions with little, if any, provocation.

During her battle with the Light Warriors, she killed Black Belt. After Fighter held the six-armed Kary at bay using his newly-crafted Sword-Chucks, Red Mage managed to stuff her into a bag of holding and cast Ice-9, an enormously powerful Ice spell capable of freezing an entire Universe, into it. White Mage then shattered the frozen bag with her hammer, destroying the bag and all its contents, including Thief's collection of more riches than actually exist. Kary was last seen together with Lich, greeting Kraken as he entered Hell.

Ice-9 is a triple play on words, referencing three different things in pop culture: the simplistic spell naming system of the early Final Fantasy games, ninth-level spells in Dungeons and Dragons, and Ice-IX in Kurt Vonnegut's novel Cat's Cradle.

Kraken, Fiend of Water, AKA Ur/Jnn'efur

Kraken, Fiend of Water.
Kraken, Fiend of Water.

First Appearance: Episode 753: Day of the Tentacle

Kraken, the fiend of water, is an ancient being worshiped by the Cultists, known to them as Ur or Jnn'efur that Fighter accidentally summoned.

The being initially appeared as a large chaotic mass of sticky tentacles that engulfed Red Mage [1] just before he could reveal the fiend's weakness. While Thief stole the Orb of Water, Fighter attacked the being until it fell apart and Kraken emerged as a separate tentacled, human-sized entity. Black Mage told Kraken he was the one who summoned him and ordered him to first destroy Fighter and Thief, then carry on with his actual task, bringing about the Apocalypse. However, before Kraken could begin, Red Mage cut him open from the inside and killed him. Kraken was last seen being greeted by Lich and Kary as he entered Hell.

While the fiend is mainly addressed as Ur in the comic, Red Mage does note that Ur is "your basic Krakenoid". Later, Black Mage also used this phrase to describe Ur, prompting Fighter to bounce it around against the inner walls of the Sea Shrine with Black Mage in reference to the video game Arkanoid.

[edit] Minor Characters

[edit] Princess Sara

Princess Sara.
Princess Sara.

First Appearance: Episode 052: Meanwhile...[6]

The Princess of Corneria, daughter of King Steve and Queen Jane and the heir to the Cornerian throne, Princess Sara had already been kidnapped about six times by the time Garland got to her. Her rescue is the first mission that King Steve gives to the Light Warriors. Although she appears to be a respectable princess, Sara hides a calculating and bloodthirsty nature. For this reason, she used her time as Garland's "prisoner" to attempt to coach him into becoming a proper villain.

After the Light Warriors "rescued" her, she has continued to show interest in evil, but has not taken any villainous action. At one point, she turned down an offer to take the fourth position in the then-forming Dark Warriors, declaring them hopeless. The vacant position was eventually occupied by Vilbert von Vampire.

[edit] Steve

Steve.
Steve.

First Appearance: Episode 058: Government At Work[10]

Steve is the father of Princess Sara and former King of Corneria. He recruited the Light Warriors, requesting that they rescue his daughter, Sara, from Garland. Steve was a capricious and entirely delusional despot with only a tenuous grip on reality who, among other things, has devastated his country in an attempt to drill for mana, believed he was running for election against a length of string (ignoring the fact that Corneria is a monarchy) and made a coffee stain his right hand man ("Rodney"). After Sara was "rescued", he started spending his time making excuses to wage war on Elfland. Recently, Steve lost his position as King to Rodney in a game of poker, then to the aforementioned length of string while his "left-hand man", Gary, tried to get it back for him.

[edit] Dr Swordopolis

Dr. Swordopolis.
Dr. Swordopolis.

First Appearance: Episode 083: A Shout Out to All You Web-Heads Out There[11]

Dr. Swordopolis is the very incarnation of all things sword. He appears to Fighter in visions, taking the form of a bespectacled blade and bringing cryptic and oft-ignored advice. He has numerous powers, including spiritual possession and the ability to cut through the fabric of space-time. His origins and motivations are unknown.

[edit] Doctor Malpractice

First Appearance: Episode 084: Maybe he's greedy for a good cause?[12]

Doctor Malpractice was the doctor consulted by King Astos to dispatch of Clan Khee'bler, starting with its king. However, upon discovering his father's "illness," Prince Elf (alias Thief) told Dr. Malpractice that he would secretly leave Elfland and travel the world, stealing treasures and sending them to the doctor to fund research on the disease. The doctor, taking the opportunity to get easy money, agreed and put the funds in his own pocket while, at the same time, receiving money from Chancellor Usurper to keep the king incapacitated. When Thief returned to Elfland, Malpractice's plan went to waste and he fled the Elven lands.

[edit] The Other Warriors

The Other Warriors are a band of adventurers based on Dungeons & Dragons character classes. They travel the world and occasionally meet the Light Warriors on their journey.

Generic Half-Elven Dual-Class Ranger

First Appearance: Episode 435: He's a Fighter, Not a Diplomat

A half-Elven Ranger who is very poetic and adventurous, as well as extremely friendly and trusting, though a bit naïve. He is capable of firing multiple arrows at once with uncanny accuracy. Ranger is a dual-class character, with both classes being Ranger, and has mixed ancestry, making him half-Elven, three-eigths human and one-eigth Orcish.[13]

Berserker Axinhed

First Appearance: Episode 437: Companion

He stands out because of a multiple personality. Half of the time, he is a civilized, gentle Dwarf and a great conversationalist. The other half of the time, he is in a blind rage, swearing and shouting incoherently while mauling whoever happens to stand nearby (usually Thief). In his civilized state, he tends to wear a monocle and often does not remember what he did in his berserk rage.

Cleric

First Appearance: Episode 446: "Stand Up Next to a Mountain..."

A "miracle shopper" who makes deals with the Gods. In order to keep an open market, Cleric prefers not to devote himself to one single God and is, in fact, an atheist. His use of divine intervention is often faulty and unreliable. Cleric made a deal with a Trickster God named Raven to bring Thief back to life; in return, Raven bestowed him with a "healing shiv", which has shown its worth in bringing Thief back from the very brink of death.

Rogue

First Appearance: Episode 446: "Stand Up Next to a Mountain..."

Like Thief, he is constantly scamming people, including his own teammates. However, unlike Thief, who conducts his business through contracts and legal loopholes, Rogue relies on a network of shady contacts, at least one of which is Thief himself.

[edit] The Doom Cultists

First Appearance: Episode 523: The Doom That Came to Ice Cave[14]

The Cultists are a doom cult the Light Warriors have encountered twice so far. They dwell in extremely remote areas and worship ancient beings that are reminiscent of the ones found in H.P. Lovecraft stories. The Cultists induce new members by chopping their heads off and implanting the larva of an "Old One" in the body, where it matures, giving the Cultists the appearance of a humanoid being with long tentacles in the lower half of their faces. The Cultists thus resemble illithids or Mind Flayers, fictional monsters from the roleplaying game Dungeons & Dragons who look similar and procreate in much the same way. The Cultists take pleasure in disturbing paraphilia (especially those that carry taboos). All of the Cultists that were introduced have names that are pronounced similarly to female names, such as Mrr'grt (Margret), L'zlhe (Leslie), Lv'rn (Laverne), or Suh'zahne (Suzanne).

The Light Warriors first encountered the cult in an arctic cave, where they were trapped in another dimension by the cult's object of reverence, a monster resembling a large eye stalk. The group escaped this dimension and slaughtered the cult members.

The second encounter took place in the sunken Sea Shrine, where the reformed cult worshipped Ur, the third Fiend. They were again slaughtered, this time by Black Mage, and the Light Warriors accidentally used their ancient "End of the world formula" to summon Ur by invoking Ur's true name (Jnn'efur [Jennifer]).

[edit] Raven

Raven.
Raven.

First Appearance: Episode 581: Of Tricksters and Thieves

Raven is a totemistic representation of trickery. When Thief was nearly killed by Berserker, Raven tricked Thief into thinking he was dead. At the brink of dying, Thief's soul was in his own personal Hell, in which everything was his and there was nothing left to steal. Thief said that he would do "anything" to get out of the personal Hell he was in; subsequently, Raven got Thief to sign a contract, which Thief failed to read closely. The nature of the contract is still unknown. Raven is friends with Bahamut.

[edit] The Ordeals

First Appearance: Episode 608: Teleporting never screws anyone[15]

In the Castle of Ordeals, the Light Warriors were separated temporarily. During this time, each of them had to do battle with the worst flaw in their personality, each of them being one of the seven deadly sins. Fighter had to contend with the personification of Sloth, while Red Mage had to deal with his Pride. Thief had to fight his Greed; however, due to interference from Fighter, Black Mage ended up fighting it, as well as his own ordeal, Wrath. All the ordeals appeared as unnatural monsters, except for Wrath, who was a doppelgänger of Black Mage, as nothing else was evil enough to represent his sins.

After each of the ordeals were defeated, the Light Warriors were reunited to fight the final ordeal, a giant Zombie Dragon that was defeated when Thief stole some of its vertebrae. Like in Final Fantasy, defeating the Zombie Dragon earned the Light Warriors a Rat's Tail, which they later exchanged for Class Changes.

[edit] The Dark God

The Dark God, Executive Assistant to Chaos.
The Dark God, Executive Assistant to Chaos.

First Appearance: Episode 654: Ominous[16]

One of the Dark Gods Black Mage worships and the one who brought about his class change. The Dark God appears to be involved in some sort of rivalry with Dr. Swordopolis, although the exact implications of this rivalry are still unclear. His official title is "Executive Assistant to Chaos", being one of many middle management deities in the organization of evil. The Dark God is known to work in the 'Ministry of Earthly Affairs'.

The Dark God is unnamed, but due to the fact that his sprite is that of Magus from the game Chrono Trigger, many fans call him by that name. Black Mage himself made up the name "Darko, the Dark God of the Dark" in an attempt to convince his friends that he had really met a Dark God.

[edit] Running gag characters

These are characters that appear as running gags in the comic.

Onion Kid/Rex Crockett[17][18]

First Appearance: Episode 041: It Just Got Weird in Survivor 8-bit Style Part 6[19]

A child who has been traumatized multiple times during the course of the comic. His original family, as well as two foster families, have been killed, usually as an unintended side effect of Black Mage's actions. Black Mage also destroyed a cargo shipment of food and medicine, prompting the orphanage he was attending to kick him out. He himself has been placed on trial for the murder of his foster relatives.

The Real Light Warriors

First Appearance: Episode 087: A Day Late and a Buck Short

A party made up of a Knight, a Ninja, a Red Wizard and a White Wizard, upgraded character classes from Final Fantasy. These four warriors were supposed to be the real Light Warriors of Destiny, but the Light Warriors beat them to it. Since then, they've always been several steps behind the heroes. Much like Onion Kid, they often suffer great pain as a side effect of the Light Warriors' actions.

Akbar

First Appearance: Episode 144: Premature Upgrade?

A shopkeeper and skillful scam artist. Akbar usually offers extremely badly disguised shoddy services. For example, a typical Akbar store would be named Akbar's Discount Amnesia Dust Outlet (not talcum powder).

The Messenger and Elite Royal Guard Hank

First Appearance: Episode 157: Back in Corneria...

Elite Royal Guard Hank was ordered by King Steve to kill an unnamed Cornerian messenger for bearing bad news: however, the king forgot to tell Hank he'd meant the order as a joke. Hank has been hunting the messenger, who occasionally can be seen delivering messages for King Steve, ever since.

Jeff

First Appearance: Episode 315: Lesser of Two Cons

A merchant similar to Akbar. However, Jeff is honest about his services, which, while being just as shoddy as Akbar's, are, in some manner, useful. Jeff sold the Light Warriors a deathtrap, an airship that is unusually honest about its nature. He has a tendency to kick Black Mage whenever he sees him, something that earns him the other Light Warriors' liking.

[edit] References

  1. ^ Episode 024: "She's a White Magic Woman.". 8-Bit Theater.
  2. ^ Episode 074: Guest Appearances By.... 8-Bit Theater.
  3. ^ Episode 622: Now shut up. 8-Bit Theater.
  4. ^ Episode 172: The Inhabitant of the Cave. 8-Bit Theater.
  5. ^ Episode 300: The House Always Wins. 8-Bit Theater.
  6. ^ a b Episode 052: Meanwhile.... 8-Bit Theater.
  7. ^ Episode 208: Look Who's Back. 8-Bit Theater.
  8. ^ Episode 268: Out on a Web. 8-Bit Theater.
  9. ^ Episode 366: Evil Has a Name. 8-Bit Theater.
  10. ^ Episode 058: Government At Work. 8-Bit Theater.
  11. ^ Episode 083: A Shout Out to All You Web-Heads Out There. 8-Bit Theater.
  12. ^ Episode 084: Maybe he's greedy for a good cause?. 8-Bit Theater.
  13. ^ Episode 804: Origin Of The Ranger. 8-Bit Theater.
  14. ^ Episode 523: The Doom That Came to Ice Cave. 8-Bit Theater.
  15. ^ Episode 608: Teleporting never screws anyone. 8-Bit Theater.
  16. ^ Episode 654: Ominous. 8-Bit Theater.
  17. ^ Episode 700.1: Ripped From Today's Headlines. 8-Bit Theater.
  18. ^ Confirmation of Episode 700.1 being canon on the Nuklearpower messageboards. 8-Bit Theater.
  19. ^ Episode 041: It Just Got Weird in Survivor 8-bit Style Part 6. 8-Bit Theater.