Zonk

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This is about the dice game. For the type found on Let's Make A Deal, see Let's Make A Deal

Zonk is a social dice game, similar in scope to Dice 10000, where the goal is to accumulate 10,000 points by rolling dice. This is not a kind or forgiving game, as all players must follow a strict code of conduct or else risk the chance of losing their next turn. It may sound complicated, but once played, Zonk is a rather quick and easy game.

Contents

[edit] Equipment required:

  • 2 or more hardy souls
  • 5 dice (6 sided)
  • pad of paper
  • writing utensil
  • a healthy supply of your intoxicant of choice.
  • the TOOL (lighter, can opener)

[edit] Game play

[edit] Terms used in gameplay

  • Zonk - refers to the loss of a turn by not rolling a scoring die combination
  • Spaz - refers to the loss of a turn by infraction of the Code of Conduct
  • Sh@t, Bloads, Vanna, Power Zonk - refers to a Zonk on a player's first roll
  • Social - it's time to be social... all players must partake of their intoxicant
  • Sweep - referring to the action of collecting the dice from the playing area and rolling them.
  • The Spoils - referring to the intake of your intoxicant of choice.
  • Open - Surpassing the minimum threshold of 350 points in player's first scoring hand.
  • Board - Playing surface
  • Ben-ing, Camping - used to refer to someone who has held onto the TOOL much longer than they need to, disrupting the zen of his/her fellow players.

A Scorekeeper is appointed and each person gives their pseudonym, which the Scorekeeper duly records. Once all names are recorded, and the TOOL is in its place, "game on" is called. From this point onwards players MUST follow the code of conduct. Each player takes a die and rolls it, the highest rolls first and dice control proceeds clockwise amongst the players.

The player sweeps the dice and rolls. The dice are then checked for scoring combinations. If the player rolls Bloads, their turn ends and control of the dice is passed to the next player. If there are any scoring dice, the player may decide to save at least one of them and roll the remaining dice or, once 350 points have been accumulated for that round, the player may choose to stop and bank their current score, and pass control of the dice to the next player.

If the player decides to continue rolling, he/she may choose to save any scoring dice from that roll. Once saved, they are moved off to the side so as not to interfere with the next roll. If at any time during a turn the player has 5 scoring dice, he/she must add his score, sweep the dice, and continue rolling, adding any new points to their existing score for that turn. this new roll is called the second generation of that turn. the third time they are rolled, it is the third generation, and so on. If the roller makes it to the fifth generation and "banks" his/her score then they get to change one of the other players pseudonym. If the roller makes it to the seventh generation and "banks", then the roller gets to make a new rule. Rolling Bloads on any generation ends the player's turn.

Scores are recorded by the scorekeeper once the player announces his/her decision to stop rolling. A player may not make this decision if there are 5 scoring dice on the board.

Play continues until a player scores over 10,000.

[edit] Scoring combinations

dice roll points
1s 100 each
5s 50 each
1 + 1 + 1 1000
2 + 2 + 2 200
3 + 3 + 3 300
4 + 4 + 4 400
5 + 5 + 5 500
6 + 6 + 6 600
any 5 of a kind face value x 1000 (five 4's is 4000)
1 + 2 + 3 + 4 + 5 (a straight) 1000 + sweep
2 + 3 + 4 + 5 + 6 1000 + sweep
"420" (see below) 1000 + turn ends and social

[edit] Code of Conduct

All players must adhere to a strict code of conduct, any voilation of the following code results in an immediate zonk and loss of next turn. If the offending player is the player whom is currently rolling, that player passes control of the dice to the next player. Infractions are cumulative and are immutable.

  1. All players must play with a pseudonym. Each reference to a player by their non-pseudonym name results in an infraction.
  2. The Scorekeeper cannot lie; everyone else is free to talk up a storm.
  3. If it is not your turn, you don't get to intentionally touch the dice, unless its a "run doses".
  4. Game play must stay smooth. Anyone caught stalling during their turn for 2 minutes or more gets a spaz.

(In some variants, the 2 minute rule is replaced with a verbal and audible 10-count conducted by 1 or more other players. The 10-count is often cleverly disguised as idle chatter, sometimes even involving the culprit in elaborate conversations! If the 10 is reached, the player gets a spaz. It's called being "spaced out" or "spaced," is duly recorded in the scorebook, and results in lots of ridicule from other players, as it should.)

  1. No camping on the TOOL. Anyone caught using the tool and not returning it to its designated spot gets a spaz.
  2. The scorekeeper is responsible for maintaining smooth gameplay, this includes proper addition of scores, recording of the "game on", "half-time" start/stop and "game over" times.
  3. Be gracious. If the player before you scored, ask them for permission to roll. Don't touch the dice before they put their intoxicant back on the table or specifically instruct you to roll, or you get a spaz.
  4. If someone rolls three 6's, everyone must put their thumb on the table. The last person to do this gets skipped.
  5. A "fake-out" is when someone is tricked into putting their thumb on the table when they're not supposed to. Usually this is done when others put their knuckle on the table instead and you weren't paying attention. That gets a skip.
  6. An "eddy" is when a die rolls off the table. This causes someone to forfeit their turn.
  7. If a person is rolling their last die and it lands a 2 that is called a "run doses" and can be picked up by any player and either rolled or "eddied".
  8. "420" is a special rule that is generally only applied in the smoking version of the game. If you roll any combination of at least three 4's and 2's on your first roll, then you can roll the remaining dice one at a time in an attempt to get all 4's and 2's. If you succeed then the rolling stops, you get 1000 pts and everybody gets to hit the bowl once, except for yourself who hits it twice.

[edit] Role of the Scorekeeper

A Scorekeeper is often appointed because of drinking prowess. It is an honoured, but it has many responsibilities.

  1. The Scorekeeper is responsible for counting correctly, recording names, scores and game on/off (and halftime) times accurately. If a player calls the Scorekeeper on a mistake, the Scorekeeper must spaz himself.
  2. The Scorekeeper is responsible to pay attention to the TOOL, and adequately penalize those "Ben"ing it.
  3. The Scorekeeper is the only person not allowed to lie.
  4. Any and all infractions are to be recorded by the Scorekeeper (including his own). All infractions are cumulative. Please see dirty tricks.
  5. All infractions must be recorded by their proper terminology where the players score should go. Please review the terms used in gameplay.
  6. The scorekeeper is the babysitter. You probably got the position because in real life you're the caring nurturer, and in the game you're assigned the role of the arbiter (or instigator) of most conflict in the game. When in doubt, remember...

[edit] The dice never lie

The Scorekeeper is the boss except when it comes to the dice. On any disputes regarding the dice, the dice decide the player's fate. If invoked by the Scorekeeper, the player in dispute must roll out the rest of his turn, until he either gets five scoring dice (and the resulting sweep) or causes an infraction of the code of conduct. The dice cannot be disputed.

[edit] Flow

During intense moments of concentration, excitement, or intoxication (usually a mixture of all three), players often spiritually connect with a being known to some as "The Flow," to others "Zen," "The Force," "Lady Flow," etc. Call it what you want, but the Flow is to be feared and respected, for it can have enormous influence over your luck during gameplay. Listen carefully to what you hear/feel: if she tells you to "Parlay" that last die (see below), make sure it really is the Flow and not some selfish voice in your own head. After the roll, it will become clear whether the Flow was with you or not. If it was, ride the wave, but ride with caution! If not, make your apologies to the Lady, relax, and open up to the good flow.

[edit] House Rules

These are residence specific rules, subject to change per the host of the gathering. There are additional rules that you can add onto the game. These are dictated by a seventh generation rulemaking or are inherited from whomever taught you to play. But there are also some house rules that become standard and unquestioned.

  • If a person is packing a bowl or getting the community their beers, they are safe from being "sixed"
  • Every 1,000 points gained allows the player to partake of The Spoils. This is called a bonus.
  • Defined playing area, the size of which matters only to the host of the gathering. Size is arbitrary, but should be around the size of a small chess board for amateur players.
  • If a player disrespects the dice by dropping, mishandling, fumbling or throwing them off the table, they get a spaz and lose all accumulated bonuses. If a die is dropped off the table and another player catches it, they are awarded a Golden Glove bonus, but they also risk a spaz.

[edit] Specials

(Here are a few rules that we have added in our personal playings)
  • Second hand straight-just as it sounds, same value, but the rolling stops there
  • Twins-if the last two dice rolled are a pair, then that's 200 points + sweep
(these rules were written by the first editer of this article)
  • If a player gets 3 bonuses in a row, it's called a Turkey, and they are encouraged to partake 3 more times (at their leisure).
  • when 5150 and 6900 are reached EXACTLY, the scoring player is encouraged to partake of The Spoils yet again. Scorekeeper notes the occasion.
  • Socials may be awarded when a player's score at the end of the round matches the social score 4200.
  • All Odds or All Evens: if a player is rolling 5 dice and the dice are either all odd numbers or all even numbers, the player may call "All Odd" or "All Even" (depending on the situation) and partake of the spoils. No other privileges obtain from this call; it is simply a reward for the observant. A player can earn multiple bonuses in a turn using this call.
  • Unders: at any time during a turn, subject to the player's whimsy, they may call out "Unders" while rolling and whatever dice were rolled are immediately turned upside down, while the unrolled scoring dice are left alone. The player then scores normally. Being in essence a coin-toss bet, Unders offers no statistical advantages unless the Flow is involved, and therefore should be used cautiously by beginners; advanced players often invoke Unders when they feel a mental nudge from said Flow. It can be rewarding to daring players; it is used especially in "Parlay" (see below).

[edit] Extra scoring rules

[edit] F3000, FH, F8000, L3000:

A special new rule can be added to the game by the following 4 persons: the first player to reach a score of 3000, 5000, and 8000, and the last player to reach 3000. Each new rule is decided upon by the player first reaching these scores, and is of their own choosing. Generally, the group of players has a set of popular rules, and these are invoked first, which increase both a player's chances of scoring and their chance to get some of the Spoils; later rules are usually designed by the winning player to either slow the advance of the other players or to increase chances of his/her own consumption of the intoxicant. Some common rules are described below:

  • Two Pair (mandatory): If a player is rolling either 4 or 5 dice, and rolls two pairs (e.g. two threes and two sixes), the player MUST sweep the dice, while counting all scoring dice and invoking any mandatory or optional side rules. In addition, the player must partake of the intoxicant. Failure to properly invoke this rule results in a spaz. This rule is the most popular, since a player not only gets to score all dice and roll a new turn; they also get a free shot at the Spoils.
Two Pair can, and must, be used evey time it is applicable. This can mean, during the later stages of the game, that a turn can involve several instances of 2-Pair; as a result, players may have to spend some real quality time with the intoxicant and the tools and it is during these times that spazzes and space-outs are most frequent! Pay close attention to the game while it is not your turn!
  • Ziggity (once per turn): Ziggity, with the possible exception of Parlay, is generally the second most popular side rule next to 'Two Pair.' It is a once-per-turn rule that, when called, permits the roller to sweep all the dice and roll again. The roller may not count any scoring dice when Ziggity is called. The rule helps an unlucky roller out of a tough spot, but offers little beyond that.
The circumstances that permit Ziggity to be called are fairly straightforward: Ziggity may be invoked when 5 dice are rolled and almost create a straight; that is, if one die were changed, the roll would become a straight. For example, Ziggity could be called on the following rolls: 1-2-3-4-4; 1-2-3-4-6; 1-1-3-4-5; etc. because if one die were changed, the roll would be a straight. Again, this rule does not add to your score; it just gives you a free "roll-again."
  • Parlay: Parlay is a complicated, advanced rule with variable gain, and should be used with caution, unless a player is feeling strong vibes from Lady Flow. Parlay is essentially an incentive for those bold dice rollers who have rolled in succession until they have 4 scoring dice, and who intend to continue rolling the final die. If a player calls Parlay, the last die can now count not just on 1 or 5, but also on the (non-scoring) number previously displayed.
  • If the final die shows a 1 or 5: the score of the previously-rolled scoring dice is doubled and added to the fifth scoring die. (Example: a player shows 3-3-3-5-6, calls Parlay and rolls a 5. The previous 350 points are doubled to 700, and this is added to the final 50 points for a final score of 750 for the roll.) The player then sweeps the dice and continues the turn.
  • If the final die shows the same as previously displayed: the 4 other dice are scored normally, the dice are swept and the turn is continued normally. (Example: in the previous example, if the player rolled a final 6 instead of a 5, s/he would receive 350 points for the turn and sweep the dice.)
Parlay Odds and Peer Pressure: If a player has already made the rather unwise decision of rolling two remaining unscoring dice (only a 56% chance of scoring), Parlay can be a further incentive to keep rolling even if it is further unwise to do so. Because Parlay essentially increases your chance of continuing your turn from 33% to 50%, it can become an attractive option to the desparately-behind-on-points player, even though it reduces their fate to a coin-toss. On the other hand, a player who is well in the lead is only risking a few hundred points to keep rolling, and may be likely to invoke it for the sheer thrill of the gamble. This makes Parlay fun for both the losing players and the winning players, but for seriously competing players, the benefits should be carefully weighed before Parlay is invoked!
  • SATAN (Munson and Sweep optional):
Every so often, a player finds themselves so far removed from the good graces of Lady Flow that they become desperate for help from the Dark Side. It happens slowly, typically when the last-place player crosses 3000 points, several thousand points behind on the far side of halftime. At that point, the rules start getting crazy, and someone has called the SATAN rule. The losers watch helplessly as the leaders rack up points and shots at the Spoils, and someone starts to notice a lot of people scoring with 3 sixes. Soon the player becomes convinced that they are being made an offer by the Devil to ambush Lady Flow. Sure enough, on his/her next role, they get 3 or more sixes. The poor player ponies up their soul and invokes the SATAN rule. This player has just earned SIX opportunities to partake of the Spoils. The 600 points are scored normally, Lady Flow has been (at least partially) captured, and the player continues as usual (unless the SATAN rule is modified; see below). The SATAN rule can be used by any player. SATAN can even be used by the leading scorer, who may already be in Dreamland, just to spite the other losers. Because he can.
  • If the rule is modified to "SATAN Sweep," the player may sweep the dice immediately and roll again. This would normally be a violation of the rules, but nobody is going to argue with Satan.
  • If the rule is modified to "SATAN Munson," the player will sit out their next turn, allowing them to catch up on the Spoils, while pondering the dark fate of their soul everlasting. Concentration is key at this point, to keep Lady Flow from escaping the clutches of the Dark One. The player should frequently remind the other players who is the boss now.

[edit] Dirty tricks

  1. Try to find out when your friends are playing Zonk. Call one up (usually the one who didn't invite you) and play dumb. Ask them who is playing and who's winning. If they are dumb enough to list off everyone in the game, they're dumb enough to play barmaid while their friends continue following the code of conduct.
  2. When you are not the Scorekeeper, tell other players (incorrectly) that it's their turn to roll.
  3. Pretend to help people keep track of their score, but fool them into thinking they have a different score. If they lose track, they spaz.
  4. Distract people with conversation or stories to get them spaced out.
  5. Say your real name incessantly to implant it into your opponents' heads. Invent clever songs with your name to further the point.